Wordsofwisdom

[Orchids_07]

I met this guy a few years ago off a dating site. He told me his story that he was in the process of a divorce.. I'm which I verified to be true. Our connection from the beginning was powerful. Long story short, I ended up pregnant, in which I think it was intentional. I went through the pregnancy alone while he went back to his ex whom he did divorce. He finally met his daughter when she was 5 months old. I let him and his family be a part of her life because I thought this would be beneficial to our daughter, because I don't have a family. He has persued me for a year since he has met his daughter and I finally gave in. For 3.5 months now, we have had an emotionally charged affair and his relationship at home has been horrible. This is a woman that he has spent 21 years with, divorced her and since then has been trying to make it work for his kids. Prior to our affair, I bent over backwards trying to make the best life possible for our daughter. He has had a vacation planned for over a year now, more about him than family, and he is taking her along, saying this is basically his last ditch effort to see if he wants her as a partner. I'm understanding of this since the time they have been together.. But more or less, I did give him an ultimatum. She let him know that she's not leaving and that she will be nice but not miserable for the kids and he could go on living his life the way he chose in order to be happy.

I have gave myself completely to this man, the father of my child. I'm so lost on what to do. I told him recently that in order for him to give it an honest try in his relationship that we needed to take a break and he agreed for 3 weeks. I'm so lost right now.. Please help.

[13Hearts]

I have found it's not a good idea to give yourself completely over to anyone, especially a man. Use this three weeks to clean your house and your mind of this cheater, and refocus your energies and efforts on YOU and your daughter.

 

You say you have no family but you do: You and her. Take the cheater trash out and make it an awesome family, the two of you!!

 

Keep reading and posting here. Many will be along soon to provide more support ❤❤❤

[Poppy47]

Do you have a legal agreement with the father of your child?

 

Does he pay child support? I not get legal advice.

 

Please get yourself out of this affair with him. To me, he sounds emotionally unstable and probably using both you and his wife to prop him up.

 

Keep your relationship with him all about the child. Strictly parental business.

 

Concentrate on the child and give her all you have. She deserves a great start in life. Her father doesn't deserve it.

 

Poppy.

[Orchids_07]

Thank you very much ladies. You're so right, I do have a family, her and I. I knew better than to start down this road from him, because our connection was so strong prior to our daughter and I fought it off so long. There is noway I can be this ow for years. I've barely made it 3.5 months. I'm sure that he is thinking that I'm not strong enough to pull away from him once these 15 days, but the joke is on him. I'd rather hurt then than continue what I have gone through. It's not fair to me or my daughter, we do deserve the world.. And I plan on giving her just that, with or without him. I guess time will tell, I just have to remain strong and not give into him any longer if he does decide to stay. No, we don't have a court order, but he does pay child support.

[Orchids_07]

So tonight, I receive a text from him. Telling me that he had made it safely and to say he hoped his daughter was okay and sent a picture. I kept my reply short and to the point and he then responded ttyl?. I thought we had agreed that we were taking a break and that the 15th is quickly approaching. I must say.. This man had no idea what affection was until we started. He was like a little school boy when I grabbed his hand or gave him a kiss in front of our daughter. For example we went out to dinner one night and I hadn't seen him for a couple days and I just had this urge to touch him.. So I held his hand across the table. I could tell that it was making him nervous so I released it. ( we were out of town where no one knew us) and when we went out to the car, I made the statement that I noticed he was uncomfortable and he replied.. Everyone knew we were there together. I let him know it wasn't nothing to do with that, it was just because I wanted to touch him. And I added that if he wanted our waitress, more power to him.. Lol. Now he freely grabs me and our daughter up and kisses us whenever he gets the chance. Please help.. I'm so lost.