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Epiphany from a Stranger (MM)


Back2WhatUKnow

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Back2WhatUKnow

So I had a random talk with a stranger. Who is a customer from my job. Basically he was an older guy who use to come in with a younger female. They always looked happy together. Well for a few weeks he was alone. My coworkers all gossiped that he was married and the lady was an OW. So this random MM opened his world to me today. He told me how he is still married for 15 yrs..has 2 kids..preteen ages and was in an A for 4 yrs with his OW. He broke it off a month ago for the final time because he said the OW went nuts. Contacted his W would show up at their house and stalk them, scared his kids. So he got a RO and is living at home with his W.

 

Our stories were similiar besides the crazy OW stuff and the kids are younger. But it was therapeutic for me to ask this random stranger. Why didnt he leave at one point? He told me he lived seperate with the OW for a bit. But his kids was the reason he held on. He said "it is hard to be in 2 places at one time and my child asked me why does daddy have to be with some random girl." He said he would look in the mirror and say he couldnt keep up with the OW. He felt he was getting older.

 

He said he drew up the D papers several times but would pull back because his W wanted to work on it. This gave me alot of insight. He said Deep down he couldnt leave, he knew he wasnt living his life right. He said "You cant make number 2 (ow) a priority or number 1." I felt my voice crack as I asked this random guy questions of his status and how he feels about the OW.

 

I then felt the truth...I know when I cutted off my own A and staying NC is the best option I have ever made. The truth of realizing they don't move on and if they do..you wont be a priority. Every circumstance is different but man that was just the advice i needed to hear.

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