findmyway Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 My heart hurts, my soul hurts, my mind won't stop turning....... The thoughts go from missing MM so badly, to guilt, to wondering how I will ever be able to trust anyone else, to feelings of why do I even deserve anyone else.. and then there is the thought of will i really ever be able to move on before I know for sure if now separated MM will go back home or not?? I am finding it so difficult to move forward from all of this. Just when I think I am getting stronger I get flooded with a day full of emotions. Link to post Share on other sites
Jess-Belle Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Ah, the roller coaster... When I blasted my own A with a MM to smithereens by telling his wife, even though I didn't want him anymore, it still hurt like hell. I obsessed about him for days. After going through that, as well as my own affairs and the betrayal I was dealt, I can empathize with the thoughts and emotions you're dealing with. Kind of feels like someone dropped a bomb on your sanity doesn't it. Even though our stories may have some big differences, I suppose we are united in a way in the pain and consequences. It's a shame anyone has to go through it, but it is a powerful learning tool as well. Yes, it is possible to recover from this... You will find that you can be a hell of a lot stronger than you ever gave yourself credit for. Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Its called "withdrawl". Affairs are very, very addictive. You're going through the emotional "withdrawl" symptoms right now. They DO fade, and it does get easier with time and effort on your part. On the good days, go out and enjoy yourself. On the bad days, do something to change your focus from MM to something else, something POSITIVE in your life. Rely on your support systems (family, friends, etc...) to help you deal with the depression. Go see a doctor and get treated for that depression if you need to. And hang in there! People DO recover from this...all the time! Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 (edited) My heart hurts, my soul hurts, my mind won't stop turning....... The thoughts go from missing MM so badly, to guilt, to wondering how I will ever be able to trust anyone else, to feelings of why do I even deserve anyone else.. and then there is the thought of will i really ever be able to move on before I know for sure if now separated MM will go back home or not?? I am finding it so difficult to move forward from all of this. Just when I think I am getting stronger I get flooded with a day full of emotions. Try finding a man that is not committed!! Then you wont have to worry about him going back home. I am not saying that you wont have issues, but they will be of another kind. I'm still legally married to some loser that left me for OW... so I had no choice when it came to being in this situation because they both put me there AND I MOVED ON, with his kids, money, business, car, LIFE- I HAVE KEPT IT ALL!!! AND SHE INHERITED MY HEADACHES!!!! BETTER HER THAN ME! AND LIFE IS GREAT!!! Life is short and you only get to live it once!!! I sat in a dark room crying for years... WHAT A WASTE! Why waste time waiting for someone that is not even yours???!!!! Go out, meet people, make friends, distract yourself and stop crying over spilled milk. I wont even say "better said than done". I have gone through hell and back and I was the W- that had her FAMILY at stake and all my years that I invested in my marriage, yet I LIVED AND SO WILL YOU. GET OVER IT!!!!!!!!!! Put some lipstick on and bounce! Edited March 7, 2008 by MimiMe Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 release the fury of CAPS LOCK Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 release the fury of CAPS LOCK and I am sure that you understand what CAPS LOCK mean in net lingo. Just like if I was speaking in front of you, you'll know what it meant. But look at your username... lil flying hearts for you! Link to post Share on other sites
Jess-Belle Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 I don't know why but listening to sad love songs really helps me in these situations. Especially if they're by some really tragic figure. My personal favorite is The Cure. You just know that man knows heartbreak forwards and backwards, and the way he expresses it through music is beautiful. Somehow, it makes me feel less alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author findmyway Posted March 7, 2008 Author Share Posted March 7, 2008 I am with you on that one Jess Belle. My ipod is loaded with sad songs that supposedly make me feel "better". Although, it would probably be better for me to listen to nice cheery songs... at this point, those just piss me off!!! Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 release the fury of CAPS LOCK Or loan some CAPS to John who's keyboard doesn't seem to have a "shift" key? Link to post Share on other sites
Jess-Belle Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 I am with you on that one Jess Belle. My ipod is loaded with sad songs that supposedly make me feel "better". Although, it would probably be better for me to listen to nice cheery songs... at this point, those just piss me off!!! That's a good outlook to take If you really want a good "tragic" one though, listen to The Cure - Pictures of You... oh the times I have listened to that over and over, bawling my eyes out! Sometimes you just need to let it out, and that gets it going for me. I don't know why but sometimes when I am deeply sad, I can't bring myself to cry, I just hold it all in. I feel much better after having a nice fulfilling sob-fest Link to post Share on other sites
Jess-Belle Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Oh, and before I forget... chocolate... lots and lots of chocolate! Link to post Share on other sites
Author findmyway Posted March 7, 2008 Author Share Posted March 7, 2008 Thanks Jess! I have heard that Cure song you were referring too. I will have to download it tonight. Oh yes.... and I will be sure not to forget the chocolate!! Thank God for this site. Definitely helps in these very, very weak moments. Link to post Share on other sites
Jess-Belle Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 Glad we could be of some help Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 7, 2008 Share Posted March 7, 2008 NO! You guys need to listen to empowering songs!!! Happy tunes! None come to mind since my i-pod is dead (besides the #1 man bashing song I WILL SURVIVE!! LOL!... but why listen to wrist-slicing songs when you already feeling sad?!??!?! Link to post Share on other sites
Author findmyway Posted March 7, 2008 Author Share Posted March 7, 2008 I know....it kinda sounds backwards, doesn't it?? But like Jess Belle said earlier, sometimes you just have to have a good cry to get your emotions out and feel alittle better. I feel that way sometimes. Often I can have a good cry, then strengthen up and go out w/family or friends and then listen to the empowering songs. Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Hey... whatevs helps you "find your way"!! Crying is the soul's way to release poison... I think, or at least when it comes to matters of the heart. Link to post Share on other sites
justice Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Evanescence. Going Under is the song you'll want. *nods* Link to post Share on other sites
twice_shy Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 I am finding it so difficult to move forward from all of this. Just when I think I am getting stronger I get flooded with a day full of emotions. You shouldn't be having the attitude that is is difficult to move on. You should be having the attitude of, "why the hell would I want him?". He is a cheater. If he was to divorce his wife and then married you, just wait til the 7 year itch sets in after 3 years and he'll be doing the same. Most leapords can't change their spots. If he did it to her, he can do it to you. Be thankful and see this as an opportunity to get away from a cheater. Link to post Share on other sites
twice_shy Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 NO! You guys need to listen to empowering songs!!! Happy tunes! None come to mind since my i-pod is dead (besides the #1 man bashing song I WILL SURVIVE!! LOL!... but why listen to wrist-slicing songs when you already feeling sad?!??!?! My fav would have to be "Here's a Quarter" by Travis Tritt. Call someone who'll listen And might give a damn Maybe one of your sordid affairs But don't you come round here handin' me none of your lines Here's a quarter, call someone who cares Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 My fav would have to be "Here's a Quarter" by Travis Tritt. Call someone who'll listen And might give a damn Maybe one of your sordid affairs But don't you come round here handin' me none of your lines Here's a quarter, call someone who cares Good one Twice! I'm still sticking to "I will survive" LOL! I was in Mexico at a karaoke bar singing it till 6am! hahahahhaha! Link to post Share on other sites
twice_shy Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 Good one Twice! I'm still sticking to "I will survive" LOL! I was in Mexico at a karaoke bar singing it till 6am! hahahahhaha! I bet you were having the time of your life and just belting that one out. I did the same thing with here's a quarter when a bunch of us guys went out. I didn't request it, but a buddy of mine did and pushed me up on stage. Link to post Share on other sites
MimiMe Posted March 18, 2008 Share Posted March 18, 2008 I bet you were having the time of your life and just belting that one out. I did the same thing with here's a quarter when a bunch of us guys went out. I didn't request it, but a buddy of mine did and pushed me up on stage. LMAO!!! You bet I did! They had to take the mic away from me and force me in a taxi back to my room. It was fun and liberating to curse someone out in 2 languages! Link to post Share on other sites
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