jjlove Posted December 29, 2007 Share Posted December 29, 2007 Hey you guys, I am absolutely new at this,... Let me get to the point... I am a married 24 yr old woman, I have daughter with my husband... We have been together for 7 1/2 years. We have definatley been through our ups and downs, He cheated on me with his sex girlfriend for the 1st 2 1/2 yrs of our relationship, It became a competition of me getting him, I took him back had a kid moved in together and got married, I hardly trust him, which in it self is horrible, but i do love him... recently on Myspace I got into contact with an old fling (before my husband) I live in NY he lives in Kansas he also is in a relationship and has 2 small children (both under 2) he is in the airforce, great looking, and he completes me... He is everything my husband is not, I have had premature thoughts about leaving my husband to be with him, but its so premature I dont know what to do... I love my husband, Unfortunately my OM is not at all happy in his relationship, she is in the process of looking for a new place to live(becasue she wants to) i admitted my feelings to him and he reciprocated, It scares me that I married the wrong guy, but I see myself being with the OM, but dont know that I can leave my life with my husband... Please somebody give me some advice... I mean i can't move to Kansas but I really feel that I could fall In love with him and that it could work... Please help... Link to post Share on other sites
imstunned Posted December 29, 2007 Share Posted December 29, 2007 from reading your post your life sounds compliacted enough already - getting involved with another man while still married wil only make it more complicated and messier, and hurt people. I'm sure the posters of LS will have some great advice for you. a Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted December 30, 2007 Share Posted December 30, 2007 Either fix your marriage because you owe to your child to make it work, to give it your best, or end it. Divorce, have shared custody and co-parent together. To go and cheat is just pure selfishness and a bad choice. Link to post Share on other sites
PoshPrincess Posted December 30, 2007 Share Posted December 30, 2007 I don't think anyone on here is going to advise you to cheat, no matter how bad your M may be. There is no good reason for cheating whatsoever. If you are unhappy in your M then you need to make a decision to end things. I agree that your life already sounds extremely complicated. To involve yourself extra-maritally (or otherwise) with a man who is still in a committed (albeit unhappy) M himself would be insane and would just complicate your life further. I think the best thing for you to do is to take a step back from the friendship with your ex - by all means explain to him that you are doing so and why - and sort out your M. Decide whether you want to stay with your H or whether you should leave. You need to do this for yourself, not because you feel there is someone else out there for you. If you still think your M has a chance (and I feel you do as you say you are not sure if you could leave the life you have with your H) then get some counselling (independent or otherwise) and do everything you can to make things work. You owe this to yourselves and your child. It doesn't sound like there's a lot of trust in your M and it doesn't sound like your H was committed from the start so maybe your best bet would be to cut your losses and run. Only you can decide. Once you have sorted your own life out you will then be mentally ready to enter into another R, with a SINGLE GUY. Best of luck x Link to post Share on other sites
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