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Do men having affairs think about their mistress when at home?


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Old 30th April 2011, 3:21 PM   #1
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Question Do men having affairs think about their mistress when at home?

I am writing an article on affairs and I am researching if men who have fabulous sex with a woman outside their marriage (their affair) ever think of (yearn for) the "mistress" when they are at home with their wife? Do the thoughts get in the way with your relationship with your wife?
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Old 30th April 2011, 3:26 PM   #2
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My MM (soon to be divorced) said he did think of me the two times they did it. He will always watch movies and think of me and get teary eyed. Just from what he has told me.
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Old 30th April 2011, 7:44 PM   #3
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In my experience, yes they think often of their affair partner and whether it impacts on the marriage depends a lot on the state of the marriage and the intensity of the affair.
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Old 2nd May 2011, 12:27 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by kristismiles View Post
He tells you about sex with his wife and how he thinks of you during it? Oh my my my how absolutely precious.
This got me soooooo tickled!
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Old 3rd May 2011, 11:01 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tajmahal View Post
I am writing an article on affairs and I am researching if men who have fabulous sex with a woman outside their marriage (their affair) ever think of (yearn for) the "mistress" when they are at home with their wife? Do the thoughts get in the way with your relationship with your wife?
I have never had an affair but i imagine if i did... no i would not think of her outside of our trysts.i could, literally, bend my secretary over my desk at 10am and I would have already forgotten of her by lunch
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Old 4th May 2011, 1:10 AM   #6
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/sarc/Yes all the time it was a curse upon our marrige/sarc

Seriously......

I can't pick his brain. No one has that capability. I could only hope she was as good as me on my worst day...
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Old 4th May 2011, 3:56 PM   #7
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/sarc/Yes all the time it was a curse upon our marrige/sarc

Seriously......

I can't pick his brain. No one has that capability. I could only hope she was as good as me on my worst day...
love this..my H's affair were not about sex..since we had it all the time, even during his A..according to him she just laid on her back ..I doubt he was thinking of her..hey i can tell myself that if I want lol!!
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Old 4th May 2011, 4:04 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tajmahal View Post
I am writing an article on affairs and I am researching if men who have fabulous sex with a woman outside their marriage (their affair) ever think of (yearn for) the "mistress" when they are at home with their wife? Do the thoughts get in the way with your relationship with your wife?
Given that he was constantly emailing and texting me while at home, clearly he was thinking of me. As for that getting in the way of his marital relationship - they didn't have one, to speak of. If they were ever at home at the same time, she'd be sitting knitting watching TV in one room and he'd be with the kids, watching movies or playing video games with them, in another.
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Old 4th May 2011, 4:06 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by whammy View Post
I have never had an affair but i imagine if i did... no i would not think of her outside of our trysts.i could, literally, bend my secretary over my desk at 10am and I would have already forgotten of her by lunch

lol.......
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Old 4th May 2011, 4:10 PM   #10
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I don't think that this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by HalfAlive22 View Post
she just laid on her back
equates with this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tajmahal View Post
if men who have fabulous sex with a woman outside their marriage (their affair)
but I guess some people's standards are lower
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Old 4th May 2011, 4:11 PM   #11
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Because most affair partners dont get much face time together...I would think that the bulk of the affair IS thinking about AP.

But...my exH would be hard pressed to even tell you the names of his OW.
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Old 4th May 2011, 4:20 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by OWoman View Post
I don't think that this:



equates with this:



but I guess some people's standards are lower
knowing the other women he was with, wich I do..yes his standards were much lower...Idk..lol
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Old 4th May 2011, 6:07 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tajmahal View Post
I am writing an article on affairs and I am researching if men who have fabulous sex with a woman outside their marriage (their affair) ever think of (yearn for) the "mistress" when they are at home with their wife? Do the thoughts get in the way with your relationship with your wife?
well this is your 2nd "I'm writing an article about" something to do with affairs.

but to answer the question, "Do men having affairs think about their mistress when at home?'

my answer is: who give a flying #$%&?
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Old 6th May 2011, 10:19 PM   #14
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I had sex with H once during A. I could not fail to think of xMOM, as he was in my thoughts constantly. I still have trouble not thinking of him after 1 year NC.

I did recount to xMOM this experience. I thought he was aware how sick of myself I was at this sex with one man thinking of another.

But then a few months later, upon reconciling with his W, he told me he thought of me while having sex with her. I think he thought that was sweet. I did not think that.

It was hard to be me when I was thrown under a bus. But I would not be in his W's shoes for anything. Which is ironic really.
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Old 6th May 2011, 10:31 PM   #15
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Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by kristismiles View Post
He tells you about sex with his wife and how he thinks of you during it? Oh my my my how absolutely precious.
Lol!! I have to agree on this one. I would be d**m right insulted if a guy told me this. What a POS.
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