Hillary H Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) When I was out of town he had a text exchange with someone. I did an online search on the number and it belonged to someone promoting themselves as Helping Hands, personal services, massage. I called the number and a woman's voicemail picked up say her name which was the same name that I had seen online.these texts happened At least twice in the past 3 months. In both cases it was the first days of my out of town trip. It probably has been going on longer, I just haven't had access to the detail on the phone bill until recently. We've been together 14 years. What would you think? What would you do? I'm sad...and scared...i feel yucky inside Edited July 3, 2015 by Hillary H Sorry I think I should have put this under Infidelity? I'm new here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hillary H Posted July 3, 2015 Author Share Posted July 3, 2015 Thanks. Is a "paid for" service a "no big deal" then? Is it kind of understood that most married men do this? I'm baffled. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Although the timing and lack of disclosure is suspicious, how do you know this isn't a non-sexual therapeutic massage? Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Although the timing and lack of disclosure is suspicious, how do you know this isn't a non-sexual therapeutic massage? Mr. Lucky LOL. Suspicious? Seems his 'back' only goes out when his wife's out of town. What an unbelievable coincidence. I think the reply after your initial post was removed, so I don't know who you're replying to when you question if a paid service is no big deal and if it's 'understood' that married men do this. Well, it's 'understood' that sleazy, cheating, opportunist married men do this. Especially when their wives are out of town. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
spanz1 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 do most guys do this? No. Is he horny when you are not home? Yes What can you do about it? 1) how is the sex life when you two are together? are you burning up the house with desire, or is it tepid, and he can not wait for you to leave to get his rocks off? if it is tepid, FIX that. 2) are you communicating with him when you travel? do you video Skype EVERY night you are away? Maybe he is just getting lonely. 3) do you communicate about sex things when together? ask him why he needs to have hand jobs with prostitutes when you are not there. really discuss what the boundaries you have for the marriage are, and really listen to what he says his needs are. 4) maybe there is some compromise. He does not use these massage parlors when you are away, but instead has cyber sex with you via the internet 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I need more info. If it really is only a regular G rated massage place, calm down. If it's a "happy ending" massage place get an STD check immediately then have a very long talk with your guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Thundarr Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 When I was out of town he had a text exchange with someone. I did an online search on the number and it belonged to someone promoting themselves as Helping Hands, personal services, massage. I called the number and a woman's voicemail picked up say her name which was the same name that I had seen online.these texts happened At least twice in the past 3 months. In both cases it was the first days of my out of town trip. It probably has been going on longer, I just haven't had access to the detail on the phone bill until recently. We've been together 14 years. What would you think? What would you do? I'm sad...and scared...i feel yucky inside I'm sorry Hillary, you have to know the kind of services this place provides. Why else is he's sneaking around when you're gone. That's why you have a yucky feeling. Don't let him rationalize this as no big deal and don't let others make you question what's obvious. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I'm with the others here. Communication is key. Link to post Share on other sites
Haydn Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 `Helping hands` is a rather an unfortunate name these days....... I do hope it`s a legit place......... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) Call the place yourself and ask if it is a legitimate massage therapy clinic and if every single one of the practitioners is a lincenced massage therapist. Then ask if they accept your insurance. If if is a legitimate massage therapy office, they will start asking you questions about your condition, what therapy your doctor has ordered and will ask you insurance questions. If the person on the other end of the phone seems befuddled that a woman is calling and seems to have no clue about insurance claims, you are probably talking to a less then reputable establishment. Edited July 3, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Come ON, guys! If the guy was looking for LEGITIMATE massage therapy, he wouldn't be HIDING it from his wife. She'd KNOW all about it and he'd be doing it with her knowledge. If it were legitimate, she'd know about it - just like she knows about his dentist appointments or doctor's appointments and everything else of that nature. Secondly, did everyone miss how she said he ONLY contacts this massage person AFTER she leaves for an out of town trip? Legitimate my ASS. Link to post Share on other sites
Haydn Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Come ON, guys! If the guy was looking for LEGITIMATE massage therapy, he wouldn't be HIDING it from his wife. She'd KNOW all about it and he'd be doing it with her knowledge. If it were legitimate, she'd know about it - just like she knows about his dentist appointments or doctor's appointments and everything else of that nature. Secondly, did everyone miss how she said he ONLY contacts this massage person AFTER she leaves for an out of town trip? Legitimate my ASS. I agree. `Helping hands` Just seems well............. If they were called `No nonsense relaxing healthy massage LTD (With no extra`s, only a small mint` Then maybe. I hope i am wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
newlywedder Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Sounds like they will be "helping" him get off when their "hands". Bring this to his attention ASAP that you want to know what is going on. See if he confesses. I wouldn't convict him of anything yet until you 100% know all the details. Link to post Share on other sites
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