I have to confess that even though I hate porn, and have given it up so my husband would give it up, and restore our healthy sex life, I sometimes miss looking at naked pictures myself.
It has nothing to do with my husband....it doesn't really do anything to me sexually...I just like to look. I watched a movie about a porn star (not porn, a MOVIE ABOUT porn) and the main character was just so mesmorizingly beautiful. I wanted to look at a dirty magazine
It isn't because I'm not sexually satisfied, or because I want to look at naked bodies, or anything like that...it's just there's a beauty in things like the women of playboy that I like to look at...they are just so seductively beautiful. There's something about looking at a doctored up picture of beautiful breasts that makes me want to look....kinda like a bug is drawn to light.
I can not break the connection between my husband and porn, connected to my husband neglecting me. So I want it as far out of his life as I can get it. I hate it for what it's done to us....on the same note, however, I do have a slight desire to go out and buy a playboy, AND I'M A WOMAN! So for me, it's not to get aroused...it's more of curiousity. Yeah, looking at people in sexual positions turns me on, and often rather than bother my spouse, I'd masterbate......like if I couldn't wake him up. Also, I like to do it in private too....it's kind of embarassing to sit and LOOK at people doing it.
It's not because there's something wrong with my spouse, it's not because I'm not sexually satisfied...it's sheer curiosity. And yes, it's addictive to the point of the more I see the more I want to see.
I'm trying to understand myself, because even though I despise porn to the point of wishing harm on porn stars, I actually miss it sometimes
Mostly when I'm menstrating.
So if your husband is still treating you well, try to get past the porn thing. If you can't, however, try to talk to him about it.
I couldn't get past it. My husband didn't want to have sex with me, but he was all ready to masterbate to some stranger's body. That hurts. So I got really offended, and hurt, and we fought for about a year, and as of late, he hasn't had any porn that I know of, and he's reverted back to treating me like a princess.
So it's an individual thing. I can't BELIEVE that I still miss porn sometimes. But I'd rather never have it again, then have it in my husband's life.
When I origionally came here with that problem, I wanted answers that I could accept, and no one could give me any. "It's a sexual release," and "It has nothing to do with you." Didn't help me, because I wanted to be his sexual release. But...I don't know. I think your husband looks just out of curiosity. He's not neglecting you, is he?