shadowlane2007 Posted May 19, 2013 Share Posted May 19, 2013 This is my second marriage and we are going on eight years...during our first year things were rocky to say the least;a month after we were married i discovered by accident that she was still talking to a couple of old boyfriends, she had left her e-mail open on my pc and the e-mails were right there when i came home, then to top it off My wife and children did not get along and we had minor quarrels over this issue... we made it through that issue and then just into our second year of marriage i logged onto my computer and again her mail was open...what i saw and read floored me!! She was carrying on with three differrent men at the same time so i printed the e-mails and confronted her that weekend and at first she denied everything until i showed her the e-mails...at first she was very apolgetic then she became angry and hostile and eventually we split up...she left while i was at work. Several months went by and i left my job and went out west just looking for a new start, i still checked my e-mail from time to time and then i opened a mail from her and she wanted to talk...one thing led to another and i relocated to where she was and all seemed good for about a year although i had my doubts about some of her behavior like texting in the bathroom and keeping her phone with her day and night we bought a house together and things went downhill from there our time together became very few and far between and she still kept her phone with her at all times,constant text messaging and it was always family according to her but she would hide the phone when i came back into the room and she sleeps with it under her pillow...she works nights and i work days so we only have maybe one night a week that we are actually in the same bed at the same time and she is usually up in a couple of hours to keep her sleep schedule she says. She has gotten so that on those nights we sleep in the same bed she scoots way down in the bed so there can be nocuddling or anything, the tv is is on constantly, the intimacy between us(if that is what you want to call it) is maybe a quickie every 4-6 months and she will not touch me nor initiate at any time...basicly i have to ask and i am tired of that; i feel that i should not have to do this. i feel neglected and un loved...i am nothing more than a room mate to her paying bills and being a babysitter for her Daughters children. I am 50 years old and she is 53...she says it is menopause that causes her to not want intimacy with me and yet she is always making comments like "i think i caught an STD from the toilets at work" or "i am a cougar and i love it!".... My question is this ...am i crazy or is there something to all this???? my children say that i have blinders on because i am too close to the situation and that i love her ...I have a gut feeling that i should have never gone back to her after what happenned in the beginning but i felt that it needed another shot...to see if i was wrong or not. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted May 20, 2013 Share Posted May 20, 2013 This is my second marriage and we are going on eight years...during our first year things were rocky to say the least;a month after we were married i discovered by accident that she was still talking to a couple of old boyfriends, she had left her e-mail open on my pc and the e-mails were right there when i came home, then to top it off My wife and children did not get along and we had minor quarrels over this issue... we made it through that issue and then just into our second year of marriage i logged onto my computer and again her mail was open...what i saw and read floored me!! She was carrying on with three differrent men at the same time so i printed the e-mails and confronted her that weekend and at first she denied everything until i showed her the e-mails...at first she was very apolgetic then she became angry and hostile and eventually we split up...she left while i was at work. Several months went by and i left my job and went out west just looking for a new start, i still checked my e-mail from time to time and then i opened a mail from her and she wanted to talk...one thing led to another and i relocated to where she was and all seemed good for about a year although i had my doubts about some of her behavior like texting in the bathroom and keeping her phone with her day and night we bought a house together and things went downhill from there our time together became very few and far between and she still kept her phone with her at all times,constant text messaging and it was always family according to her but she would hide the phone when i came back into the room and she sleeps with it under her pillow...she works nights and i work days so we only have maybe one night a week that we are actually in the same bed at the same time and she is usually up in a couple of hours to keep her sleep schedule she says. She has gotten so that on those nights we sleep in the same bed she scoots way down in the bed so there can be nocuddling or anything, the tv is is on constantly, the intimacy between us(if that is what you want to call it) is maybe a quickie every 4-6 months and she will not touch me nor initiate at any time...basicly i have to ask and i am tired of that; i feel that i should not have to do this. i feel neglected and un loved...i am nothing more than a room mate to her paying bills and being a babysitter for her Daughters children. I am 50 years old and she is 53...she says it is menopause that causes her to not want intimacy with me and yet she is always making comments like "i think i caught an STD from the toilets at work" or "i am a cougar and i love it!".... My question is this ...am i crazy or is there something to all this???? my children say that i have blinders on because i am too close to the situation and that i love her ...I have a gut feeling that i should have never gone back to her after what happenned in the beginning but i felt that it needed another shot...to see if i was wrong or not. I think it's safe to say you were wrong. No? Link to post Share on other sites
ForeverHopeful1 Posted May 22, 2013 Share Posted May 22, 2013 Hello?!??!! McFly!??!?! You in there? You KNOW the answer. End it. Don't look back. Don't let the sun set tonight before dumping her ass. Do not do this to yourself another day. How much more info do you need? You DO have blinders on. Your children know better than you do. Get out. Run. Fast. Go! Link to post Share on other sites
HonestNeurotic Posted May 22, 2013 Share Posted May 22, 2013 Sounds like you've got a succubus! Hiding phones and computers is always a bad sign. ALWAYS. IMHO - as always Link to post Share on other sites
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