It's been 4 months now...

[AnalogueAnimal]

I've been in a relationship with a girl for a while now. Lately, I am starting to lose interest in her and we have fights often and I don't think it's my fault. The fights are mostly due to her refusing to skype. When we first started being friends, we had agreed upon skyping or calling to each other once in every few days.

 

It's been 4 months now and she still hasn't video chatted with me. Every time, she would give an excuse and today, she finally told me she doesn't like talking to someone on phone or skyping. I told her It makes me feel close to her when we video chat and I tried make her understand from my perspective but she got mad at me for starting a fight again. All we do is text and I want to talk to her at least once in a few days but she didn't even try to understand me. Am I forcing her and pressuring her to skype with me? Sure, she hates the concept of Skyping but I was hoping she would at least make an effort for me.

 

I'm starting to wonder if her and I will last any longer. I don't know if I'm being needy here. I tried to explain but it didn't work..What else can I do? Or should I just ignore it?

[badpenny]

... Am I forcing her and pressuring her to skype with me? Sure, she hates the concept of Skyping but I was hoping she would at least make an effort for me.

I hate skyping. I positively loathe it, and will not do it.

I have loads of freinds who skype, and relatives in Italy, who d likewise.

I refuse.

I'd much rather talk to people IRL, and use other means of communication at other times. But skype is just not my bag.

I understand if others want to do it, but nobody's ever tried to coerce me, fore me, cajole me, or oblige me to use it, and everyone I know, who has skype, respects my decision.

They don't seek a 'why'. They're just happy to go along with it.

So we write, use FB, text (occasionally) and even actually - gasp!! - talk on the 'phone.

 

I'm starting to wonder if her SHE and I will last any longer. I don't know if I'm being needy here. I tried to explain but it didn't work..What else can I do? Or should I just ignore it?

 

I'll be honest with you:

If you can't keep your strong feelings for her, alive, without skyping, then even if you were to skype, you'd be going off her.

This doesn't sound like a particularly strong and earnest relationship at all, to begin with.

 

My father and mother met while my dad was on holiday in Italy. She was 17, he was 28. He was British, and lived in England.

 

They corresponded by letter - and that alone - for three years. In fact, my Italian grandmother (being a R.Catholic puritan and prejudiced against anyone foreign and/or from a different religion - remember, this was in the early 50's) withheld many of the letters my father sent, and intercepted the flowers he arranged to send to her, for birthdays and special occasions.

 

In spite of these obstacles and difficulties, they kept their relationship alive, and eventually married when my mother turned 21. That marriage lasted for 57 years, until my dad died.

 

Now think of your GF.

If you had those difficulties and obstacles, would you still pursue her and move heaven and earth to be with her?

 

Doesn't sound like it to me.

If you need skype to keep this alive (or at least, if that's what you THINK you need) then you need to question the whole situation and be honest with yourself: Do you need to keep seeing her and speaking to her, to continue this relationship?

Or is this on dodgy ground already?

[joony]

I have to admite,thats strange.. usualy girls are those who initiate skype and all. Im six months so far..and we are talking every single day,every second on skype.. did you even seen how does girl look like? Maybe she is ashame of her look or something.

[d0nnivain]

Just end it. With the distance, phone & skype are all there is. If you don't have that, what do you have . . . a few e-mails? Hardly enough

 

If you aren't getting your needs met, get out.

[fred123]

I hate skyping. I positively loathe it, and will not do it.

I have loads of freinds who skype, and relatives in Italy, who d likewise.

I refuse.

I'd much rather talk to people IRL, and use other means of communication at other times. But skype is just not my bag.

I understand if others want to do it, but nobody's ever tried to coerce me, fore me, cajole me, or oblige me to use it, and everyone I know, who has skype, respects my decision.

They don't seek a 'why'. They're just happy to go along with it.

So we write, use FB, text (occasionally) and even actually - gasp!! - talk on the 'phone.

 

 

 

I'll be honest with you:

If you can't keep your strong feelings for her, alive, without skyping, then even if you were to skype, you'd be going off her.

This doesn't sound like a particularly strong and earnest relationship at all, to begin with.

 

My father and mother met while my dad was on holiday in Italy. She was 17, he was 28. He was British, and lived in England.

 

They corresponded by letter - and that alone - for three years. In fact, my Italian grandmother (being a R.Catholic puritan and prejudiced against anyone foreign and/or from a different religion - remember, this was in the early 50's) withheld many of the letters my father sent, and intercepted the flowers he arranged to send to her, for birthdays and special occasions.

 

In spite of these obstacles and difficulties, they kept their relationship alive, and eventually married when my mother turned 21. That marriage lasted for 57 years, until my dad died.

 

Now think of your GF.

If you had those difficulties and obstacles, would you still pursue her and move heaven and earth to be with her?

 

Doesn't sound like it to me.

If you need skype to keep this alive (or at least, if that's what you THINK you need) then you need to question the whole situation and be honest with yourself: Do you need to keep seeing her and speaking to her, to continue this relationship?

Or is this on dodgy ground already?

 

Do you even read OPs post?! He said she doesnt like to skype or talk on the phone and clearly she cant meet in real life as its LDR. So smarty pants why dont you come up with other ideas or keep rationalising on her behalf. Rubbish

[TMichaels]

OP, have you and this girl ever met in real life or has your relationship always been strictly over the Internet?

 

 

Best,

TMichaels