Is he interested only in friendship or something else?

[PrincessKiara]

Hello! I'm a 17 year old girl raised in the States. I live in Mexico now. I have never had a boyfriend or even kissed a guy. Nor had I ever been truly in love or had anything more than physical crushes on cute guys...Until now.

 

For over two years I have been dreaming of studying the university in {a European country}, and to that end I have been studying the language. I went on Livemocha to take classes, hit a snag and messaged like 30 different natives, asking for help. Only ONE ever replied...a 27-year-old guy who I'll call Johnny, and who is always eager to help anyone who wants to learn his language or English. (His English is TOP NOTCH, I can hardly tell he isn't a native unless I hear his accent...kind of hard to do when typing. He is also learning Japanese and knows a bit of Spanish...I am fluent in both English and Spanish, and know a tiny, tiny bit of Italian...now I can speak some of his language tolerably well, but when this happened one year ago, I couldn't really do more than chew out a couple of disjointed phrases.)

 

I messaged him WITH my parents' permission, and Skyped with him so he could crit my pronunciation. Due to the time difference with his country (8h), he couldn't talk (his webcam wasn't working anyway at the moment, but he was able to use earphones to hear what I said and crit me.) We hit it off and the one-time chat spilled over into e-mail and eventually WhatsApp and Facebook. It got to where sometimes we'd literally spent all day talking. We'd start at around 9AM my time (I would sneak off messages on FB every now and again when my teachers weren't looking) and he would leave at around 4:30PM when I left violin class and he went to bed (it was 12:30AM where he lives then). We usually got along very well...twice we had arguments over politics and religion where I unwittingly said something that insulted him in a stupid way, but we were cool after I apologized. He always treated me with the utmost respect even while teasing me....for example he knows I don't like swearing so he doesn't do it with me. And he was always eager to help with my language learning, or with anything else I might need. (We collaborated briefly on a project to create a videogame, but as only he knew anything useful about programming, we filed that away in the 'to do later' folder. He studied computer science, which is what I'm going to study.)

 

We share many interests. We both love animals, technology and helping people (even if I'm terrible at explaining stuff in a coherent way). And we love to mess around and joke. I thought he was just being friendly and thought I was interesting (and okay, I loved the attention because, being the class nerd, I got no attention from anybody else except my parents and they also had my sisters to look after), but my classmates kept teasing me about talking to 'the boyfriend' (I've never had one--he knows that. He also knows that I had this huge crush on a singer from his country at the time I met him...he has never mentioned it though till now. More on that later.). About this time I began to realize that, hey, I liked him! And my dad (unrelated reasons) began to tighten the reins. He's never liked Johnny's country and now he kept saying Johnny was an idiot and an insect and it was inappropriate for us to talk. Eventually he blocked FB and took my phone to keep me from talking to him. I created a secret account just for him and snuck on to continue talking when I could.

 

My mom, who has seen our chats, told me he seemed like a nice guy but she had to listen to my dad. I only trusted my grandma then, she helped me. And then he began to get tired of me--taking longer to reply to chats, etc. So, following Grandma's advice, I stopped seeking him out. Boy did that do the trick! It took a while, but once he realized I wasn't talking to him any more, he began to seek me out on his own, and to ask me to come online more often. I was overjoyed, but determined to keep him interested (though I still didn't think he liked me liked me...) I kept myself scarce, still talking but being the first to log off, not responding right away, etc. And it became harder and harder for me...but I stuck to my purpose. And then his birthday rolled around...terrified he would refuse, but eager to give him something, I asked for a PO address (so as to not scare him). He told me he wouldn't be scared, we had known each other for a full year and he had sent postcards to people he'd known for less time than that (he knows about my dad's hatred of Romanians and him in particular). And he gave me his home address, of his own volition, mind you. That's also how I learned his last name.

 

Using some of my own small savings, I managed to sneak off to the post office and mailed him a package containing some traditional Mexican candy, a rubber-band bracelet with the colors of his country's flag (he's very nationalist) and a card with a picture of a beach, that I spent 3 whole days painting. I felt guilty for not telling my mom and later fessed up. She was disappointed that I'd lied to her (I'd told her it was for a Canadian friend of mine), but said she's suspected it all along from the way I was acting. She said that was begging. I said no because he didn't know I liked him, and anyway I give gifts to all of my friends on their birthdays; but she stuck to her assessment.

 

I continued speaking to him clandestinely. Then about a month ago my family moved away from the capital. Just before that, I met on Howrse (an online horse-raising sim game) another man from the same country, this one 24 years old and obviously not so well-educated as Johnny. I'll call him Fred. I added him on Facebook because he was to help me with my learning, but he immediately began to dedicate songs to me and tell me how beautiful I am and that he wants to make me happy and hear me speak his language. I didn't block him because overall he didn't say anything indecent, and aside from the flattery seemed like a nice sort of guy. But he immediately began to hit Like on all my photos and to comment on them. I know Johnny picked up on that as he (who rarely comments) did so on a photo Fred had commented on previously...that, and I stupidly told him about the other guy's dedicating a song to me on our first meeting. I still talk to this guy, but he keeps wanting to talk ALL the time (the time difference is a mercy or I wouldn't be able to get any homework done!), saying I'm the best, "I like very much your eyes" (his English isn't very good) and such things. And sometimes it seems to me that Johnny is jealous. Other times he seems to want me to be with Fred. What gives?

 

Also the other day he showed me Otilia's song "Bilionera" after asking me if I'm a "bilionera" and saying he didn't know what that meant. I can't help but feel that this is somehow significant--but how?

 

I know I've grown up a lot over this past year. My family say I have begun to behave in a more mature manner, and I have begun using makeup and "adult" dresses for the first time (never anything too revealing, just nice clothing generally.) And although Johnny and I never got to see each other on Skype as that one time his webcam didn't work, I have been dying to see him for the longest time. I've seen pictures...now I want to see him for real, and try to read his body language, see if he likes me back. So about a week ago my dad told me he was leaving on a trip, and I knew this was the perfect opportunity. My mom said yes, she would let me Skype with Johnny. So I asked him if he wanted to, and he said yes, he wanted to hear "MAR MARITIMO" again (a stupid chant my little sisters kept repeating the first time we Skyped and which mortified me at the time, though he apparently loved it.) and we would decide on the time. Then my mom flipped back, and I had to tell him that. He seemed to me a bit disappointed. Later she said yes AGAIN...but that was AFTER he and I had this problem.

 

He began to tease me about Fred. Before his manner was different, his teasing less personal and more respectful (not that he's disrespectful now, exactly, but he's a lot bolder than he used to be). Now he kept teasing me saying why didn't I like Fred and that I should be his girlfriend and why did I hate poor Fred and (when I told him that if I ever have a relationship I want something based on love and not on liking) he said "If you ever have a relationship? Of course you will! Can't you see Fred wants you? " And I said "well I don't want him, he's a nice guy but doesn't seem to me the caring, permanent type". And then I was about to...*GASP*...tease him back about who he liked. I went so far as to say "What about you?", then caught myself and changed my mind, parrying the question when he said "What about me, what do you mean?" He got annoyed saying something like "why do girls always expect me to guess what you mean when I can't and if I can't then I am a persona non grata" and when I apologized he was like "ok, whatever I'm going to bed bye". I was devastated. The next day I waited fruitlessly for our chatting "ritual" (he pokes both my FB accounts multiple times, I respond to his pokes, then he asks me why I'm just poking and not talking to him, and we start chatting). This is the second time I've had such a problem with him where he got mad over something I said and stopped talking...last time was a whole week of agony; he later claimed he'd seen the messages I sent and forgot to reply...this time to make matters worse I accidentally sent him a message meant for someone else, he saw it but didn't reply. I messaged him the next day and he did reply rather quickly though, but still a bit dry and short in his replies. I then told him about my mother's change of opinion. He said "well you said you couldn't so I made other plans, I'm out with friends and then I'm going to the gym" and I was like "OK then maybe next time, enjoy your outing, bye!"

 

The next day though he poked me again on both my accounts. Like nothing was wrong. I'm not angry at him, not exactly (I'd love to slap him and then hug him, ) but I've been holding off on replying, waiting for him to message me first..My last chance for about a year to Skype with him will be early this Friday, so I'm hoping he'll message me before that...he obviously wants to talk as his poking is a sign of it, and before our problem he seemed quite eager to Skype..now though I thought he seemed a bit out of sorts still.

 

Do you think he likes me, too? What might he possibly think of me? Why the sudden change of behavior? He never used to call me "smart girl" or "silly girl" but now he does both, quite frequently. He also teased me when I mentioned my new physics teacher is cute. I told him it was just an observation and I didn't really care because I wouldn't let anything distract me from my goal of getting a scholarship to go to his country next year. He asked if I would care if my teacher were the singer I like and I said no because he has no moral values. Johnny said "don't generalize" and I said "I'm not, I've read practically every Web site there is on him" and he was like, "And is he a ladies' man?" I said, "yes that's the least I could say of him" and he said, "The bad boy of {his country}? But don't all girls like bad boys? " and I said "no, I don't". But why all these sudden questions? And if it is, as my mom says, jealousy, then why in God's name would he want to urge me to be Fred's girlfriend!? I asked him why he couldn't drop the subject of Fred and he said "because I'm trying to annoy you with him, are you annoyed yet?" so that was what set off the whole thing... I ADORE him but I can't tell him, I don't want him to lose interest...

 

Also at my new school...EVERYONE is saying how pretty I am, I'm included in social circles from which I was excluded at my old one, people take me seriously and say I look like a porcelain doll, etc. I've never considered myself pretty, although since beginning to like Johnny I've taken an interest in fixing up my appearance a bit. It is rather disconcerting, all this attention...no one ever paid any to me before, and these changes in my appearance are not very recent so it can't be that. The guys help me carry my stuff like ALL the time, the girls want to chat...and while I enjoy my new status and try to be nice to everyone I can't for the life of me figure out why. And now the changes in Johnny's attitude...

 

I told him about one of my ex-classmates messaging me asking for pics of me in a bikini (!) and he said, "don't worry, I have never asked a girl for pictures in a bikini and I never will so you are safe with me. I'm not a creep." I said "I don't think you are, or I wouldn't talk to you!" and he said, "I know you know that you silly bikini-less girl. :P" (he knows I never wear things so revealing).

 

Sorry for such a loooooong post, I felt you needed to have all the info to know better...PLEASE help me, I don't know what to do, and I love him soooooo much! What should I do? And how can I tell if he likes me or WHY he is doing that, since he obviously won't give me a straight answer?

 

Thank you so so sooooo much :')

~PK.

 

P.S. When I told him about Fred he heard his real name and said, "How old is that guy 100? :D" and proceeded to explain why modern men from his country don't call themselves that even if that is their name. Then he said "next time don't ask questions to a noob, ask me, the best in my branch :P"...weird.. It seemed to me he was jealous, but is it possible? When I first saw him I thought him terribly homely, but now...I don't care, and he doesn't seem homely any more...And his "ragequits"...he didn't do that before. I can't help but feel that they are staged, for some reason.

 

So I guess my questions are:

a) What should I do? From multiple FB comments posted by himself and his friends I know he is single.

b) Does he like me? Why all the sudden teasing about other guys?

c) Does he know I love him?

d) What should I do about the other guy? I need his help (I'll also help him with his English) and he seems like a nice guy, but I don't want to lead anyone on...

e) Should I respond to his pokes, or should I go completely dark until he messages me first?

f) Come Friday, if he messages me and wants to do it, I will Skype with him, with my mom within earshot and out of sight. She said she'll talk to him first to try to gauge his intentions. Is that a good idea? He seemed very eager to Skype...but that was before this whole thing...

 

Thanks again

Edited October 15, 2014 by PrincessKiara

[HeavenOrHell]

Far too long to read, sorry.

[PrincessKiara]

Ah, okay, sorry :$ I'll post a condensed version here:

 

I met this "Johnny" guy, who studied the same career I want, is 28 (11 years older than I) and speaks several languages, on a language learning site almost one and a half years ago, because I am going to study the university in his country and no other native speakers replied. With my parents' permission we chatted...supposedly a one-time thing just to help me learn, but we clicked and eventually moved off that site and onto e-mail, then WhatsApp and Facebook where we would sometimes chat all day despite the time difference. We had a couple disagreements over misunderstandings when discussing politics, history and religion, but overall we got along very well. We rarely, if ever, spoke of love, though he knew I had a crush on a singer from his country.

 

About 5 months ago my dad, who dislikes Johnny's country, told me I couldn't talk to him anymore because it was 'inappropriate' (despite the innocent talk and my own mom's approval of him) and blocked Facebook, taking my phone as well. I went to my grandma for advice (my mom said she didn't agree with dad but had to support him) and decided to open a secret account as a Japanese boy and sneak on to talk to him. I explained the situation to him. We talked more infrequently after that due to my inability to access FB often. When I met him I thought him quite homely, but his personality is so charming...now when I look at him I just melt inside. I've had physical crushes before, of course, but this is different, deeper. I like and trust him.

 

Then his birthday rolled around. I mailed him a small present--just some candy from my country, a bracelet with his country's flag colors and a handpainted card with a picture of a beach. I asked for a PO box address so as not to scare him, but he gave me his house address of his own volition. When I told my mom later she said that would make me appear an easy woman. I said no because he didn't know I liked him, and I give gifts to all my friends on their birthdays--also he knew I've never had a bf before. She stuck to her assessment.

 

After a while he began to seem to lose interest. I followed Mom's and Grandma's advice to play hard-to-get, and it worked; he began messaging me asking where I'd gone and saying I should talk more often to him. I was overjoyed, but kept up the act, being the first to log off, waiting until he messaged me to chat, etc. And now I've changed schools and for some reason I'm suddenly popular...plus there's another guy from Johnny's country who I know over the Internet ("Fred") and who is trying his best to impress me, Like-ing all my pictures, etc. And Johnny has been teasing me continually about him, even though I've told him I don't like Fred. He'll ask me why not, say things like "Can't you see Fred wants you?" and saying that if I don't want to be Fred's gf it means I hate him ("Poor Fred you hate his guts"), and so forth. He also teased me about this singer (and did the same, "encouraging" me to like him), and about a teacher at my new school who I think is cute. All this teasing confused me and I forgot myself so far as to begin to ask him (teasingly as well) if he likes anyone! I caught myself in time but he wanted me to tell him what I had been going to say. I parried the question ("What about you?" "What about me what?" "What about what?" "What you were going to say" "No, I don't wanna" "But I wanna") and he got annoyed saying I couldn't expect him to guess what I meant. I apologized but he left (it was 3AM or so where he is.) The next day, total silence. But I messaged him later and he replied the next day saying he was very busy and had made other plans (my dad left on a trip so my mom said I could talk to him on Skype, changed her mind, and then changed it again.) The day after that, he poked me on FB as he does when he wants to talk. I waited until today to poke him back, but he hasn't used his FB all day. And the day after tomorrow might be my LAST chance to Skype with him before my father comes home and I can't anymore, so depending on his response I will ask if he wants to crit my pronunciation of his language. Before this, he seemed surprisingly eager to Skype (and he knows I wouldn't do anything indecent, nor would he ask.)

 

What's with him? Why the sudden change, and the teasing about other guys? And calling me 'smart girl' or 'silly girl'...and asking when I'm going to his country...(still a year away at least) He's always been very respectful and never used to tease me like this (like the other day he asked if I was a bilionera, a made-up word referring to Otilia's song of the same title). It doesn't really bother me, except he didn't use to be like this. Does he like me? Does he know I like him? What is up with him? I adore him but can't tell him, I don't want him to think I'm easy...or to lose any interest he may have...He is still as eager to help as he ever was, still as sweet and funny as before. But there's something I can't quite put my finger on... I am so tired of guessing and games. I just want to tell him outright and see what he says, but I know all that about guys making the first move, so I guess I'll just have to wait...How could I speak to him without making it obvious I love him but making it clear I'd like better communication to avoid problems in the future? Should I ask him point-blank about his changes in attitude? Or, if we do Skype (or even if we don't), is there anything I can say/do to indirectly be able to tell what he thinks of me?

 

Please help! :'( I'm so confused, men are so weird

Thank you in advance!

~PK.

Edited October 16, 2014 by PrincessKiara

[emi]

Ah, okay, sorry :$ I'll post a condensed version here:

 

I met this "Johnny" guy, who studied the same career I want, is 28 (11 years older than I) and speaks several languages, on a language learning site almost one and a half years ago, because I am going to study the university in his country and no other native speakers replied. With my parents' permission we chatted...supposedly a one-time thing just to help me learn, but we clicked and eventually moved off that site and onto e-mail, then WhatsApp and Facebook where we would sometimes chat all day despite the time difference. We had a couple disagreements over misunderstandings when discussing politics, history and religion, but overall we got along very well. We rarely, if ever, spoke of love, though he knew I had a crush on a singer from his country.

 

About 5 months ago my dad, who dislikes Johnny's country, told me I couldn't talk to him anymore because it was 'inappropriate' (despite the innocent talk and my own mom's approval of him) and blocked Facebook, taking my phone as well. I went to my grandma for advice (my mom said she didn't agree with dad but had to support him) and decided to open a secret account as a Japanese boy and sneak on to talk to him. I explained the situation to him. We talked more infrequently after that due to my inability to access FB often. When I met him I thought him quite homely, but his personality is so charming...now when I look at him I just melt inside. I've had physical crushes before, of course, but this is different, deeper. I like and trust him.

 

Then his birthday rolled around. I mailed him a small present--just some candy from my country, a bracelet with his country's flag colors and a handpainted card with a picture of a beach. I asked for a PO box address so as not to scare him, but he gave me his house address of his own volition. When I told my mom later she said that would make me appear an easy woman. I said no because he didn't know I liked him, and I give gifts to all my friends on their birthdays--also he knew I've never had a bf before. She stuck to her assessment.

 

After a while he began to seem to lose interest. I followed Mom's and Grandma's advice to play hard-to-get, and it worked; he began messaging me asking where I'd gone and saying I should talk more often to him. I was overjoyed, but kept up the act, being the first to log off, waiting until he messaged me to chat, etc. And now I've changed schools and for some reason I'm suddenly popular...plus there's another guy from Johnny's country who I know over the Internet ("Fred") and who is trying his best to impress me, Like-ing all my pictures, etc. And Johnny has been teasing me continually about him, even though I've told him I don't like Fred. He'll ask me why not, say things like "Can't you see Fred wants you?" and saying that if I don't want to be Fred's gf it means I hate him ("Poor Fred you hate his guts"), and so forth. He also teased me about this singer (and did the same, "encouraging" me to like him), and about a teacher at my new school who I think is cute. All this teasing confused me and I forgot myself so far as to begin to ask him (teasingly as well) if he likes anyone! I caught myself in time but he wanted me to tell him what I had been going to say. I parried the question ("What about you?" "What about me what?" "What about what?" "What you were going to say" "No, I don't wanna" "But I wanna") and he got annoyed saying I couldn't expect him to guess what I meant. I apologized but he left (it was 3AM or so where he is.) The next day, total silence. But I messaged him later and he replied the next day saying he was very busy and had made other plans (my dad left on a trip so my mom said I could talk to him on Skype, changed her mind, and then changed it again.) The day after that, he poked me on FB as he does when he wants to talk. I waited until today to poke him back, but he hasn't used his FB all day. And the day after tomorrow might be my LAST chance to Skype with him before my father comes home and I can't anymore, so depending on his response I will ask if he wants to crit my pronunciation of his language. Before this, he seemed surprisingly eager to Skype (and he knows I wouldn't do anything indecent, nor would he ask.)

 

What's with him? Why the sudden change, and the teasing about other guys? And calling me 'smart girl' or 'silly girl'...and asking when I'm going to his country...(still a year away at least) He's always been very respectful and never used to tease me like this (like the other day he asked if I was a bilionera, a made-up word referring to Otilia's song of the same title). It doesn't really bother me, except he didn't use to be like this. Does he like me? Does he know I like him? What is up with him? I adore him but can't tell him, I don't want him to think I'm easy...or to lose any interest he may have...He is still as eager to help as he ever was, still as sweet and funny as before. But there's something I can't quite put my finger on... I am so tired of guessing and games. I just want to tell him outright and see what he says, but I know all that about guys making the first move, so I guess I'll just have to wait...How could I speak to him without making it obvious I love him but making it clear I'd like better communication to avoid problems in the future? Should I ask him point-blank about his changes in attitude? Or, if we do Skype (or even if we don't), is there anything I can say/do to indirectly be able to tell what he thinks of me?

 

Please help! :'( I'm so confused, men are so weird

Thank you in advance!

~PK.

 

 

You sound really young and you are young indeed(17 years old). Im not so older than you but i know its bad to consider a LDR especially with a much older guy. And whats worse is he keep beating around the bush. Screw him. You wont get any decent relationship outcome from this. If you like the country, go for ít. Just not for him. Personally, if a guy keep making you guessing whether he likes you or not, he probably doesnt. Dont fantasize something you dont know unless you see ít with your own eyes.

[TMichaels]

All of this may have started out innocently enough, but I am sure he's figured out you now have feelings for him. Let's hope he's a decent person (though the teasing you about another boy's interest or your interest in others is rather immature) and the reason why he distanced himself from you is that he realizes the inappropriateness of the situation.

 

Why is he teasing and making fun of you? Because compared to a 28 y-o person, your crushes, priorities, and way of thinking IS silly and immature. You're 17 -- not 27. You need to understand a 28-year-old guy is light years away from you in terms of where he is in life and his life experiences. Given that, no surprise if his behavior makes no sense to you and your behavior to him is amusingly naïve.

 

Though I'm sure you think your mother and grandma are brilliant since they sided with you, neither one is helping or setting a good example by advising you to play games with boys/men and supporting you in having secret relationships and sneaking around.

 

Quite frankly, your father sounds like the only one in this scenario who recognizes the inappropriateness of you cultivating relationships online with men nearly twice your age. If I were him, I would have taken away your cell phone and Internet privileges, too.

 

What you ought to be doing at your age is socializing, dating, spending time with your friends IN REAL LIFE not online -- especially since you claim that since moving and attending a new school you've become popular.

 

From what you describe, it's not like you're some sort of wallflower that never gets picked to dance or play on the team. Get out there and enjoy your high school years with REAL people your own age who you can experience and get to know in REAL life instead of playing around and justifying relationships with strangers on the Internet who quite often DO NOT have others' -- particularly minors' -- best interests in mind.

 

 

Best,

TMichaels

[PrincessKiara]

YES! It's all fixed now! He messaged me today and I told him up front what had happened (namely that I had been about to say something stupid because I was annoyed at his talking about another guy as if I liked him and should go out with him). He apologized! And now we're back on speaking terms. YAY!

I understand why you think this, but I please ask that you not judge my choice. I care about this man and it is obvious to me, to my family, several (adult) friends and some people I know on the Internet that he also cares about me, if only as a friend. Of course if he asks me for nude pictures or any such thing I will run, but he has promised that he will never do so (after seeing that a classmate of mine did, on FB) and I trust him. My mom knows him and is trying to convince my father to let me speak to him again.

I've decided to stop talking to Fred. If it bothers Johnny (as my mother and several friends say it appears to), I am glad to drop him. I may need help learning his language, but I can find it elsewhere, and I don't want to lead him on to mistaken conclusions anyway. Johnny is the only man I have ever loved (beyond a physical crush that is).

As to "real life" people I know: not one of them catches my eye. Of the two boys in particular at school who like me, both are irresponsible, rude and disrespectful to the teachers. I want an older, more mature guy who likes to learn and won't poke spiteful fun at people or play with animals in a cruel way. Most of the boys at my school are like that, and those that aren't are just too lazy to care. The only one I've found who is actually a nice guy already has a gf, and I don't like him in that way anyway. We are friends though.

I am only asking for advice on how to know what he may think/feel about me, and how to keep him interested if he is. I will run for the hills at the first sign of deviousness, but I have known him for over a year, ever since last July, and he has been a perfect gentleman every step of the way (except for one or two slip-ups like this one). He trusted me enough to give me his home address, without knowing mine (he still doesn't). I'd like to reciprocate that trust.

[Kamila]

You're putting too much work into this pseudo relationship.

Initiate less and let him step up a bit.

[TMichaels]

He trusted me enough to give me his home address, without knowing mine (he still doesn't). I'd like to reciprocate that trust.

 

I fail to see how him giving you his home address is a huge demonstration of his trust. Seriously. What was he risking? That you'd send him an anthrax-laced love note? That you'd send a local gang of hit-men to his door?

 

Conversely, what difference does it make if he has your home address or not? He's playing around with a minor. The fewer personal details he has about you the better, however, he still can end up in lot hot water anyway since he knows you are under-age and continues to connect with you.

 

I'll say it again. I do not understand why your mother and grandmother are encouraging this relationship. You are not an adult, have had no relationship experience, and obviously have formed a romantic online attachment to a guy who is nearly twice your age.

 

Do they really know all the facts? Why are they not more concerned?

 

 

Best,

TMichaels

[PrincessKiara]

@TMichaels: Twice of 17 is 34...which is six years more than his age . And there have been relationships like this that have worked. My grandma knows personally a similar couple who Skyped for years (he was in Mexico, she in Tierra del Fuego), and after four years she went to Mexico to marry him. Later they moved back to Tierra del Fuego together.

 

@Kamila: Thank you! I have been trying to do that, by waiting until he messages me first, being the first to log off chat, taking a while to respond, etc. Is that not enough? What should I do? He's told me he wants to Skype, but he knows not to ask because my father would never allow it so we have to wait until he goes out on a trip.