I'm trying to trust my GF but I can't

[khalildz34]

Hello,

I'm in a relationship with a girl since 6 months. A month ago, I knew she was cheating on me with her ex-BF she didn't admit the truth that time but after that she did. I decide to break up with her after that, but I couldn't do that, after 2 days I met and I told her that I'm willing to forgive you.

We had a great time after that, sometimes I feel I trust her, sometimes it burns inside me because I'm afraid she will cheat on me again.

Now, I'm trying hard to trust her, I really don't know what I should do!

[d0nnivain]

You should break up with her.

 

 

You can't trust her because she is not trustworthy. She cheated on you. You found out. You didn't even mention that she was sorry or if she promised not to do it again.

 

 

You should be worried she will cheat on you again because she will. Don't wait around until she hurts you again.

 

 

Be a man not a doormat. Stick up for yourself & walk away

[khalildz34]

You should break up with her.

 

 

You can't trust her because she is not trustworthy. She cheated on you. You found out. You didn't even mention that she was sorry or if she promised not to do it again.

 

 

You should be worried she will cheat on you again because she will. Don't wait around until she hurts you again.

 

 

Be a man not a doormat. Stick up for yourself & walk away

 

Yes she said she is sorry and she will never do that again ... etc

[d0nnivain]

But you don't believe her. Look back at your first post. You said you forgave her. Then later you say she apologized.

 

 

I don't get a trustworthy vibe here. Cut your losses.

[Tressugar]

W/o trust there's no relationship. Ask yourself why are you wasting hers and yours (valuable) time.

[Simple Logic]

Hello,

I'm in a relationship with a girl since 6 months. A month ago, I knew she was cheating on me with her ex-BF she didn't admit the truth that time but after that she did. I decide to break up with her after that, but I couldn't do that, after 2 days I met and I told her that I'm willing to forgive you.

We had a great time after that, sometimes I feel I trust her, sometimes it burns inside me because I'm afraid she will cheat on me again.

Now, I'm trying hard to trust her, I really don't know what I should do!

 

You should break it off because you lied to her. You said yu forgave her and you honestly cannot.

[1fish2fish]

So far she's only given you words.

 

What has she done to earn your trust?

[aliveagain]

Hello,

I'm in a relationship with a girl since 6 months. A month ago, I knew she was cheating on me with her ex-BF she didn't admit the truth that time but after that she did. I decide to break up with her after that, but I couldn't do that, after 2 days I met and I told her that I'm willing to forgive you.

We had a great time after that, sometimes I feel I trust her, sometimes it burns inside me because I'm afraid she will cheat on me again.

Now, I'm trying hard to trust her, I really don't know what I should do!

 

Friend, a girlfriend who cheats on you just 5 months into your relationship is poor marriage material. She failed her audition for a more permanent position in your life. From what you have written she has done nothing to earn a second chance and this is why your gut is burning, your heart is in conflict with your brain, your brain knows the truth but your not listening.

 

Seriously, if she can't be faithful 5 months into your relationship how do you expect her to be faithful for the rest of your life? Just my opinion but I think if the right other man comes along your going to be left holding the bag and in a world of hurt. Get tested for all STD's, your health is at risk with this one.

[smackie9]

Two words....dump her.

[ExpatInItaly]

This one's dead in the water.

 

If she's cheating with her ex of all people at just 5 months, then she's not invested in you, OP.

 

Get rid of her before she does it again.

[Space Ritual]

Hello,

I'm in a relationship with a girl since 6 months. A month ago, I knew she was cheating on me with her ex-BF she didn't admit the truth that time but after that she did. I decide to break up with her after that, but I couldn't do that, after 2 days I met and I told her that I'm willing to forgive you.

We had a great time after that, sometimes I feel I trust her, sometimes it burns inside me because I'm afraid she will cheat on me again.

Now, I'm trying hard to trust her, I really don't know what I should do!

 

Simple...

 

respect yourself more than you do right now. You are giving off a signal o her and anyone in your future it is ok to be treated like crap by people.

 

Be nobody's Plan B or Fallback. If you don't respect yourself enough to refuse to accept crumbs, why should anyone feed you a steak?

[TunaInTheBrine]

Hello,

I'm in a relationship with a girl since 6 months. A month ago, I knew she was cheating on me with her ex-BF she didn't admit the truth that time but after that she did. I decide to break up with her after that, but I couldn't do that, after 2 days I met and I told her that I'm willing to forgive you.

We had a great time after that, sometimes I feel I trust her, sometimes it burns inside me because I'm afraid she will cheat on me again.

Now, I'm trying hard to trust her, I really don't know what I should do!

 

Infidelity is such a complicated issue, and although many people will say to just break things off once it happens, I do believe that's not always the best answer. Sometimes infidelity can make a couple stronger, while other times it can spell the beginning of the end (or just the plain ol' end).

 

Do you know why she cheated on you? It sounds like she was still in love with her ex-boyfriend from what I can glean in your post. Do you know if she has ever cheated on other boyfriends before? In my experience, a past history of infidelity substantially increases the risk for future infidelity.

 

It's really up to you how to handle all of this, but if nothing else you should try to look after yourself because it sounds like you're not holding up so well. Is she aware that you're feeling this way? I think the right thing for the offender (the person who cheated) to do after an infidelity is to manage the boundaries of the relationship for you so that you don't have to worry about potential future cheating. What I mean by that is that it is now her job to do whatever it takes to reassure you things are fine...whether that means texting you with her location when she's out, allowing you access to her phone, etc... This is the best way in my experience to reestablish trust over time. Otherwise you're going to be alone with the paranoia and trying to manage the relationship, and you're just going to drive yourself nuts. You need her participation to do this together.

 

In sum, consider her past relationship cheating behavior (if any) in how you are evaluating her. Be willing to give her a chance if she is sincere in wanting a relationship with you. Look after yourself and see if you can find a way to communicate with her how you're feeling. The more supportive she is the better the chances things will work out. If she cheats again or you just feel like she's the kind of person that really can't be trusted, then I would ask myself why I'm still in this relationship even if I feel that way.

 

Best of luck.

[Space Ritual]

Infidelity is such a complicated issue, and although many people will say to just break things off once it happens, I do believe that's not always the best answer. Sometimes infidelity can make a couple stronger, while other times it can spell the beginning of the end (or just the plain ol' end).

 

Do you know why she cheated on you? It sounds like she was still in love with her ex-boyfriend from what I can glean in your post. Do you know if she has ever cheated on other boyfriends before? In my experience, a past history of infidelity substantially increases the risk for future infidelity.

 

It's really up to you how to handle all of this, but if nothing else you should try to look after yourself because it sounds like you're not holding up so well. Is she aware that you're feeling this way? I think the right thing for the offender (the person who cheated) to do after an infidelity is to manage the boundaries of the relationship for you so that you don't have to worry about potential future cheating. What I mean by that is that it is now her job to do whatever it takes to reassure you things are fine...whether that means texting you with her location when she's out, allowing you access to her phone, etc... This is the best way in my experience to reestablish trust over time. Otherwise you're going to be alone with the paranoia and trying to manage the relationship, and you're just going to drive yourself nuts. You need her participation to do this together.

 

In sum, consider her past relationship cheating behavior (if any) in how you are evaluating her. Be willing to give her a chance if she is sincere in wanting a relationship with you. Look after yourself and see if you can find a way to communicate with her how you're feeling. The more supportive she is the better the chances things will work out. If she cheats again or you just feel like she's the kind of person that really can't be trusted, then I would ask myself why I'm still in this relationship even if I feel that way.

 

Best of luck.

 

Relationship with a girl 6 months and already pulling this.

 

There is no use in taking other factors into consideration. If it was a Long Term relationship OP was on, I would agree with some of your post. But at such a short duration OP would be best advised to skip to the ending credits and leave the theater.

 

No use in spending too much brainpower mulling over a future with a chick like this. because there is none.

[usa1ah]

I went back and read your previous thread. At least you know who she was with now. You need to walk away from her, she will never treat you with respect or be loyal to you.

 

Also read No More Mr Nice Guy. Read this before doing anything.

[juniorrocha]

Are you ready to go another 2 years barely trusting her IF she doesn't any little thing to keep you worried again?

 

Believe me. It's hell. You'll be confused all the time.

 

It's a 6 months relationship and she's shown you what she's capable of doing.

 

You can find someone who's so much better.

[Origin]

I read your other post but I'm confused on the timeline. In other post you said you've been with her for 2 months and you suspected cheating. Now you're with her 6 months and she cheated on you 1month ago(5months). So thew question is this:

 

Was the incident 2months ago(condoms) a separate incident???

 

Dude sounds like to me(unless you can clarify) that shes been banging her ex since 2 months into your relationship. If that's the case then GET THE F OUTTA there and don't ever look back.

[Friskyone4u]

You asked for advice and you have gotten it.

 

Now either take it or ignore it because this thread can go on for weeks and 90% of what you are told will be the same.

She;s having sex with ex boyfriend 5 months in to your relationship and you are playing the "pick me " game and the answer is you will never be able to trust her.

 

No one posting here knows each other. Isn't it amazing the conclusion seems to be the same???

[sandylee1]

There's far too many decent women out there for you to stick with a cheater, who you have no ties to.

 

You'll always be wondering IF she's cheating on you. She broke your trust and that's not easy to get back.

[aliveagain]

Rent and watch Forest Gump, you are Forest, she is Jenny.