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Honestly, how do you flirt?


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Hi there,

 

As I'm sure, I probably could of just googled this question and found answers out the whazoo, but for some reason I get the feeling that this forum has a lot of younger people in my age cohort who may be able to help & relate with my situation.

 

As a 17 yr old male Amercian high schoold student, I will for one state that I have never been in a relationship before. Growing up, I've never really understood the whole 'strategy' behind flirting. For me, my perception has always seen flirting as an attempt to make a girl 'get to know you'. Only problem for me is: One, I don't know how. And two, the method I've typically seen kids use at my school usually consists of the guys pushing a girls desks pushing, flicking pencils, being a class clown, telling dumb jokes, getting ripped, or just straightup being a dick. And extraordinarily enough... it works for them. Hell, I've used a flip phone for 90% of my life and the whole idea of texting (which seems to be the real thing now) even seems foreign to me.

 

So I guess in summary, what would be my first best step in learning how to flirt at my highschool? I just honestly am lost and feel completely misdireceted anytime I ask any of my peers for their intution on the matter.

 

Thanks!

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Nobody is a good flirt in HS. So don't beat yourself up.

 

 

Flirting for a guy is about communication. Pay attention when the girl talks to you. Smile. Look in her eyes. Use light touches on G rated body parts: the arm, the small of her back etc. Brush hair out of her face.

 

 

If you really want to see what it looks like, watch some rom coms on LifeTime & the Hallmark channel. Do not do exactly what they do because they are on TV & it's not real.

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Clarence_Boddicker

Flirting is easy. Find something genuine to compliment her about. Don't do it about their body, other then their hair or maybe a tattoo. Be respectful of boundaries & walk away if she gives you the leave signal. Don't have expectations.

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Are there any like.. 'guides' or methods that I can read to practice my flirting skills, because despite the fact that you have written a synopsis of it, I don't honestly feel like I have a guideline to follow in the right direction.

 

To narrow it down, what should be the 'DOs' and 'DO Nots' to flirting?

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I'll tell you now there is no guide or how too. You could go search the web, read books, watch videos. But at the end of the day it will all come down to you and how you act. For one you have to understand all girls aren't alike, and what will work on one might not work on another, two you have to realize you're your self so what might work for me might not work for you! You can't ask a pretty boy who girls are naturally attracted too "how does he do it?" Because his method might not fit you. Like me for example in HS to get a female my flirting was just I was just naturally funny , so I used that to my advantage to flirt and joke with it. I would usually start off as their friends and worked my way up. But that flirting might won't work for you.

 

 

Now I would say the cliche "just be you" line but then I would be lying, and it wouldn't help get what you want. So I'll tell you, What's most important when it comes to flirting and talking to girls is just being confident in your self. Now trust me it's easier said then done and it took me a while to gain it, but the moment you do get it you will feel like you can caught any girl and even if they do reject you your answer will be " well **** her anyway that's her lost". Oh and realize that rejection doesn't hurt but helps you. Look at it like this 1. That's one less girl you have to waste time on when there are more you could be talking too

2. It's a great learning experience and you only get better through trial and error 3. You might get rejected 9/10 but once you do catch that 1 you're feeling so much more happier. Well good luck bro

Edited by Itwasntme
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Girls love to talk, so if I see a girl I like I'll walk up to her say "Hey how are you what's your name?".

 

I'll start talking about random things really.

 

If she's giving me good conversation (i.e talking a lot and then asking me questions) I can be sure she's somewhat interested.

 

I'll then drop a few cheesy jokes and hopefully she'll touch me or whatever...

 

 

This is where you escalate. You touch her back, move closer and touch her hands. If all goes well you can go in for a kiss.

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Learningtowalkagain

Flirting starts with a smile. Always have a smile on your face when you're talking to a girl. Be confident (easier said then done). Use witty banter. If she says something try to respond with a funny quip but don't over do it. Pay attention to her body language, women read body language a million times better than guys.

 

If you want specific lines there's a bunch on the net if you do some research. Really it's about the interaction.

 

There's a bartender I'm interested in. She works the outdoor part of the bar. The other night she said something about the humidity. I told her her hair was all frizzy. She comes back 10 minutes later with her hair pulled back and gave me a smirk. I broke her stones about it the rest of the night. Got her number.

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