glasshammer Posted January 6, 2004 Share Posted January 6, 2004 I got a big problem, There's a buddy of mine. I've known him for about a year. We've played music together a few times, we're both musicians etc. We get along alright, know him fairly well, but don't hang out much. His girl and My girl are bestfriends, that's how we met. My girl recently broke up with me. Then about a month later his girl broke up with him. So he's been calling me, trying to find someone to talk to. He's pretty broken up over the whole thing. I am too, but my head is clear. Both our girls are seeking to be independent. We've been with our girls a long time, Him more than I. We're all in our mid 20's. So I'm hurt bad, but it's just something that we both got to get over so I've been trying to console the guy and tell him to hang in there and listen to his pain. We both think it's so funny how they both left us. Anyway Here's the problem I have: I recently found out that HIS girl slept with another guy the same week she broke up with him and well let's just say that she had to take the morning after pill because she apparently wasn't careful. But according to MY Buddy, His girl told him that there is no one else and that this whole "needing space" wasn't to see other guys or hook-up with other guys. The sucky thing is that I know this Information and I talk to the guy to try and help him out. He's been calling me, but it's been so hard for me to talk to him, knowing this info. What do you think??? Link to post Share on other sites
Errol Posted January 6, 2004 Share Posted January 6, 2004 I'm not clear on if she is really pregnancy or had just had sex with someone and took the morning after pill. In any event, it is not your responsibility to say anything. If she is pregnant it is up to her to tell the father. Link to post Share on other sites
InLoKo Posted January 6, 2004 Share Posted January 6, 2004 I would try and get confirmation on this gossip, first. If it is 100% true, I would tell him. It might enable him to move on and get over her, rather than clinging on to false hope. You don't actually make it clear if she is pregnant or not. Did the morning-after pill not work then? Link to post Share on other sites
Author glasshammer Posted January 6, 2004 Author Share Posted January 6, 2004 Well she almost was, But took the pill....So I should have clarified it better in the TITLE of this Post. Link to post Share on other sites
InLoKo Posted January 6, 2004 Share Posted January 6, 2004 Bl**dy hell !!!!! There is rather a big difference in the information. In that case, I would keep the information to yourself. Careless talk costs lives. You don't know any of this for certain, so don't spread gossip. Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted January 6, 2004 Share Posted January 6, 2004 Keep your mouth tight shut, unless he asks you point blank. The funny thing is, even IF it is the truth (which you and I cannot be sure of), he may know or guess already and just not have shared it with you, he may not want to know, and he surely will not thank you for passing along this rumor. Next time, just encourage the talebearer to zip it by changing the subject. By the way, whoever passed this story to you is quite capable of passing stories ABOUT you on to third parties - be they true, distorted, or false. Link to post Share on other sites
bryanp Posted January 7, 2004 Share Posted January 7, 2004 Hello, I have a question for you. If the roles were reversed, wouldn't you want your buddy to tell you? You know she immediately slept with another guy and your friend is in the dark thinking this is a temporary situation and was told there is nobody else. What kind of a friend would withhold this information from another friend? I don't get it. Link to post Share on other sites
InLoKo Posted January 7, 2004 Share Posted January 7, 2004 Originally posted by bryanp Hello, I have a question for you. If the roles were reversed, wouldn't you want your buddy to tell you? You know she immediately slept with another guy and your friend is in the dark thinking this is a temporary situation and was told there is nobody else. What kind of a friend would withhold this information from another friend? I don't get it. Assuming it was true, yes I would want to know, which is why I originally advised the poster to say something (when I thought the ex g/f was pregnant). If she was pregnant, it would be far better that his friend tell him, as he would soon find out as soon as he saw her. In this instance, she isn't pregnant and there has quite clearly been some gossiping going on, so in that case, he shouldn't tell his friend. Malice appears to be involved somewhere. Link to post Share on other sites
wideawake Posted January 7, 2004 Share Posted January 7, 2004 Originally posted by bryanp Hello, I have a question for you. If the roles were reversed, wouldn't you want your buddy to tell you? You know she immediately slept with another guy and your friend is in the dark thinking this is a temporary situation and was told there is nobody else. What kind of a friend would withhold this information from another friend? I don't get it. Just a quick thanks bryanp - I've been very impressed with every single one of your posts. Many thanks for your contributions. I couldn't agree more with the quoted statement. Link to post Share on other sites
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