1ofMany Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 I was wondering.... Has anyone here had any experience of an Ex's current partner contacting you? For example, your ex-boyfriends new girl sends you an email out of the blue? And if you have, what was it regarding? I am also curious in finding out if anyone here has had a similar experience but where the roles are reversed and you are the contactor? I'd like to hear experiences from both men and women pls!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Duckduckgoose Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 Not I personally, but when my aunt married her exH his exW contacted her to tell her that he was an abuser. My aunt was in love and didn't listen, thought the exW was jealous, etc. Her exH stayed nice for about 5 years... till she had her kid. THEN the **** hit the fan and he would beat her. She finally left him, but not after enduring a lot of abuse which caused her some mental problems (from being beat in the head literally). So if your current SO's ex contacts you, yes they might be jealous OR they might be trying to warn you. If I was with an abuser I would try to warn the next woman too! Link to post Share on other sites
Kinder-Horror Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 Theres actually another post about this from the contactor's POV. (I think it is titled "want to reach out" or something along those lines). I have been contacted by an ex of a current bf before - a few times. Usually in email or facebook message form and to say that they guy is a complete jerk or a cheater, etc. - They have always been right, but I never listened because well, they are an ex for a reason and you want to believe the best in someone when you enjoy your time with them and everything seems good. Only one time have I been contacted in an extremely polite, civil way - and that was from someone who was actually still his girlfriend and she was contacting me to ask if there was something going on (he had told me they'd split), which there was, and that quickly ended that little fling. But the exgf and I had a completely mature conversation and walked away with a lot of respect for one another. I suppose it all depends on the context of what they are saying to you Link to post Share on other sites
Analeigh Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 Yes. I have been the contactor. A guy I had been seeing for several months - I found out he was still seeing his "ex". So I dumped him. He managed to gaslight me into thinking that it was a mistake, he was trying to be the good guy, they were really over with, blah blah blah. We got back together. 2 months later I still thought something wasn't right, I researched her online from what I knew about her and found her IM. Messaged her to basically say "Hi. We've met in passing. I was just wondering if you are still seeing T*?" Of course, she said yes, many tears and much heartbreak happened on both of our parts. Eventually she went a little crazy and partially blamed it on me. She thought I had stolen her boyfriend...I thought the man I had been dating for 6 months was solidly SINGLE. What a mess. That messed me up for a year or so, and I hear from a mutual friend she hasn't dated anyone since. Link to post Share on other sites
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