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difficult times ahead


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Hello everyone.

I've been with my partner for 3 years now and I really love him, but over the last year and a half he seems to have lost interest in our sex life. I've tried anything to revive the old flame : lingerie. candle-lit dinners, toys etc... But he never seems to get the message. If I throw myself into his arms he starts wingeing that he's tired or unwell, or he says I'm "nagging".

He told me once he was depressed and that was why he wasn't into sex anymore. The news didn't really come as a surprise as I suspected it_he has a hard time at work and is feeling dissatisfied with his position. The thing is, my bf is about as expressive as a greek marble. He never really discusses his problems or state of mind with me. I suggested he went to see a doctor a while ago and he still hasn't made an appointment.

Needless to say, I feel powerless and unwanted. I am 24, supposedly in the best years of my youth, and I am in a constant state of frustration and sadness. And well, the thought of cheating (just for sex) has crossed my mind several times... Where do I go from there ?

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You said yourself you were in your prime years. You also said he doesn't communicate and he doesn't want to get help. The bottom line, therefore, is to seek a divorce and find someone who has a greater interest in sex and in being an equal partner in all other aspects of your life.

 

If he were to show a willingness to work on the marriage, to seek help for himself, etc., then I would strongly encourage you to hang in their. It seems, from you post, that you are willing to do everything in your power to work on this issue.

 

Frankly, I suspect your husband has some very deep issues that go further than you know. If he can't cope with stress at work and is still wanting to stay with the job at a cost of losing his marriage, he needs to have his marbles biggie sized.

 

Marriage is a partnership but, unfortunately, you really don't have a willing partner here...so why bother with it? What would be the purpose?

 

Don't even think about cheating. Get away from this guy, heal, and pay lots more attention to the next man you select to spend the rest of your life with.

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