xo Posted October 25, 2002 Share Posted October 25, 2002 My girlfriend wants to go and hangout with her ex boyfriend at his house to play some pool. I told her I thought it was pretty strange for her to do this and that I would feel real weird about it. Now she's going to go see him anyway. Is it reasonable for me to be worried about this? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted October 25, 2002 Share Posted October 25, 2002 You are totally free to worry about whatever you want to worry about. However, worry in this instance indicates you are insecure and concerned her ex may steal her back. If that is the case, then there is a serious trust issue in your relationship you want to explore. Beyond that, there is a serious respect issue. For your girlfriend to make an attempt to renew friendship with an ex boyfriend and lover against your wishes shows she has no respect for her relationship with you. If I were you, I would see just what comes out of this pool playing session, since you have no power to stop her from doing what she freely wants to do. If she decides she enjoys his company and wants to continue the friendship on a regular basis, dump her at your earliest opportunity. You don't need a lady who will defy you and care nothing about your feelings. I think it's nice if men and women retain platonic friends on a reasonable basis once a relationship is terminated but past lovers must be abandoned out of respect for the current love interest. This may be a power play for her. Breaking up with her will be a power play for you and show her this is a game you will not participate in. First, see where it goes. If she is very clear on how you feel about this, say no more to her. Just act!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Just A Girl2 Posted October 26, 2002 Share Posted October 26, 2002 How long have you and she been together? How long ago did she and her ex break up? How long had they been together? How long after things ended between them, did she start dating you? All pertinent questions for your situation. Any idea as to why he and she broke up? Did she happen to tell you WHY she would want to go and play pool with her ex? Um, isn't he an "ex" for a reason? Personally, I think it's strange and tacky, that someone would be in a relationship with someone new, and going to hang out with their ex...most especially if the new person (in this case, you) has expressed discomfort with them going. Either she's really stunned or really insensitive to your feelings....to not respect the fact that of course you're not going to feel comfortable with this. When you're in a relationship with someone, if you're mature and respectful, you don't knowingly do things that will make your partner worry/feel uncomfortable/upset. Either she's playing games here...or she's not quite over him....or she's just really stupid. You know her better than anyone. Which do you think it is? Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts