maybintrouble2007 Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 I think my gf of over a yr snooped my cell phone recently, but she hasnt said anything just seems like she is acting alittle strange since the day she had my cell. i did have a couple texts from an ex in it but there is nothing going on with her, but seems like she cant say anything cause she is afraid to bring it up (and i would be upset if she admitted that she did snoop) and i dont want to say anything because it is possible that she didnt. any advice? anyone been in a similar situation (how did you handle it? did you bring it up or did she and how?) Link to post Share on other sites
Blue Eyed Brain Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 By 'snooping' do you mean checking on your recent calls, texts? Or using an application to get information about your phone calls? The same output but different effort put into it.... Don't say anything. If you do she will get defensive and you will have a fight. If she brings it up, then tell her honestly what happened and then tell her that she shouldn't be checking on you. If she's starts to drive you crazy but won't confess, then tell her that you were recently in contact with your ex and keep it short. Then, tell her that "you've realized that you really care for her." That will lighten the load. Link to post Share on other sites
JackJack Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 Most of the time, unless someone is just plain suffering from insecurity issues, there is usually a reason they snoop. If there is nothing to hide, then things should be ok. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 How do you know she snooped your cell phone? When my ex and I were together, my cellphone was always laying around for him to sneak a peek, if he wanted to. When I first bought my PDA, I let him play with it for over an hour, while I left the room. I had nothing to hide. Link to post Share on other sites
reboot Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 I had nothing to hide.Exactly. If you have nothing to hide, why do you care if she looks at it? Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 If she's starts to drive you crazy but won't confess, then tell her that you were recently in contact with your ex and keep it short. Then, tell her that "you've realized that you really care for her." That will lighten the load. I like this advice. Just say something like, hey, did I tell you my ex contacted me a couple weeks ago? Made me realize how special you are to me and how glad I am we're together. ...unless YOU were the one who initiated contact? Link to post Share on other sites
bigheartkindsoul Posted October 29, 2007 Share Posted October 29, 2007 I like this advice. Just say something like, hey, did I tell you my ex contacted me a couple weeks ago? Made me realize how special you are to me and how glad I am we're together. ...unless YOU were the one who initiated contact? Yes I agree, the worst thing IMO is not being upfront and honest that an ex contacted you, makes you look like your trying to hide it. Saying it in the above way would be lovely to hear. Link to post Share on other sites
gonetildecember Posted October 30, 2007 Share Posted October 30, 2007 If you do find that she is acting a bit strange, it is mostly because she did see the messages from the ex or something that bothered her, but no direct proof that you have anything going on with anything else. It is probably bothering her on some level, but she is hesitant to ask or bring it up because that will mean you know that she snooped. If you don't want to accuse her of looking in it (because you don't really know if she did) or if you don't want to just come out and mention the messages from your ex in fear that it makes you look guilty/shady in some way, you can try.. asking her to pass you your phone or get her to check something in it- for example: asking her to check for a message from a friend in your cell, knowing she will see the one from your ex. Because you are in a sense letting her look, she would then feel more confortable to call you on it, and then you can just go with what one of the other posters mentionned... something like.. oh yeah that's old, and i'm happy with you so it doesn't really matter.. something to that affect. That way things are out in the open for both of you. But, IMO if she is looking in your phone it's usually because she has suspicions or thinks something else is going on with someone else... so maybe you should bring it up. Link to post Share on other sites
heatherd1201 Posted October 30, 2007 Share Posted October 30, 2007 what did the texts say? was it something that was meant one way but a nervous girlfriend could take another way?? I must admit, i snooped once. I didnt do it with the intention of snooping. My fiance had called a number i needed the day before so i went to his phone to get it. I saw a girls name that i didnt recognize. This was odd to me because we have a very open relationship and i know about all of his female friends. And dont have a problem with him being friends with any of them. So when I saw her name, i got nervous and kept scrolling down to see if she was in there again.... It really bothered me and because we have an open relationship i knew that if I asked him about it and told him HOW I found it it wouldnt bother him. So I asked him. And as it turned out it was the girl that cuts his hair, and he was making an appointment. Issue solved, moved on. He's also still friends with his ex so if i saw her name in there it wouldnt bug me. But we have no real trust "issues". I would give it a couple days and if shes still acting strange I would say something.....Along the lines of...... " so and so texted me today. Its wierd, shes texting me a few times lately." Then reassure her that you are happy that youre with her and dont have the drama of your last relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
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