jamesmark Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 I’ve gone out with this girl for a month and a half. When I communicate via text, I want responses at least within few hours when it’s a question. Other times when it’s kisg reg convo I don’t mind. So day before we are supposed to go a theme park together and I asked where she wanted to meet in the afternoon around 1. She doesn’t respond at all until the morning and I know she’s on her phone because she uploaded a stuff on Snapchat. This made me upset. She did this couple times recently. Should I talk to her about this? Will I come off as needy or is it right to let her know how I feel about this? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 People have to stop thinking they are entitled to an immediately returned text. To me, text is an unobtrusive way of communicating that says get back to me when you can, at your leisure. If you need immediacy, pick up the phone & call. Use the voice feature. Also understand that not everybody is glued to their phone or can conform to your schedule. If I'm busy at work, sleeping or having fun, my phone is not in my hand & I might not see your message for 6 -10 hours. Granted, she was doing other OL activities so you have some reason to believe she saw your texts & was ignoring you; don't mention that when you speak to her. It looks like stalking. If it bugs you that much, talk to her but ask her preferred method for being contacted. Also say what you said to us that general chat does not have a time limit but when you ask a Q you'd prefer a quicker reply. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 I agree with d0nnivain. If I don't care when someone answers me, I text. If I want a timely response, I call. Not only is text best for being unobtrusive, there's always the issue of occasional texts which get temporarily or permanently lost in cyberspace. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 100% agree with Donnivain and Basil. Call her if you want a quicker response. You knew you were meeting at 1 and it would have been in an area close to the venue so a reply in the morning is appropriate IMO and it would give me time to have checked out what is in the area so that I could suggest somewhere. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 Well, you were only asking WHERE to meet, at 1PM, correct? Not if you were going at all, which was already established? Also, she could have been snapchatting from her iPad and not checking her phone for texts?? (Devil's advocate : ) I do find it annoying that someone can't respond right away when confirming plans, though....if the text was seen. Link to post Share on other sites
OnlyHonesty Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 Some here say a person is not entitled to an immediate response...but they fail to mention that when a girl is really interested, she is more likely to respond very quickly. A long response time indicates low interest. If she was really into this guy, couldn't wait to meet him again, and wanted him....that text would be answered in seconds I bet... 5 Link to post Share on other sites
act00 Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 I agree not to mention you see her online through snapchat, etc. I think it would be reasonable to ask about her communication style and what she prefers. In my experience, this topic comes up pretty fast with people that I've met, and it comes up organically, just as a normal course of conversation. I will tell them I'm a texter, as I'm talking to people all day long. He has told me he's a caller. That's fine. I have clarified that I can't text while at work, so forgive any long delays. I try not to text too much in the beginning even though I really want to, as it's not something I will maintain long-term, and a sudden drop in communication causes ripples. In any case, I think it would be okay to mention to her that when you asked where to meet, you expected a response much sooner, and ask what her style is, typically. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted December 16, 2017 Share Posted December 16, 2017 IMO, she is doing it on purpose.. she has prioritized you or dates to that type of communication and is waiting for your reaction. If you react with desperation or call her out she got her answer.. Just sit back and play the game... If she isn't doing it on purpose to gauge your reaction then she is just rude and isn't dateable anyhow and that will come up soon if you continue to date. Link to post Share on other sites
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