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was I in the wrong


Dating Dating, courting, or going steady? Things not working out the way you had hoped? Stand up on your soap box and let us know what's going on!

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Old 2nd October 2017, 10:18 AM   #1
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was I in the wrong

Was I wrong. Me and a past GF started talking again very casually couple months ago. Meet up for dinner every couple weeks, Shoot some texts every few days. Past week she texted me she felt like hell, and on the monday I sent flowers saying have a better week. That day I boarded a cruise and shut my phone down. Upon return 4 days later turned phone on and got a message tried to call and thank you but phone was off. Thank you. A day after I got back I texted her and said "got your message, glad you liked them and started your week on a better note. Was on a slow boat to cuba and back. check it out first time for everything. This guy took me for a jaunt. (sent a pic of me riding a horse, she has one an knows i never rode one)

I haven't gotten a response in a day. Text doesn;t necessarily require one. Just debating if I should have mentioned I was leaving town. She has left in this time and didnt tell me. We don't inform each other of what were doing other then if we make plans together so I didn't feel the need. And If I should have texted her back more quickly upon returning as she knows when I got back from other friends facebooks. I didn;t feel a day after was too long. THanks for any input
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Old 2nd October 2017, 10:23 AM   #2
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Is this the ex from your past threads?
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Old 2nd October 2017, 10:59 AM   #3
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no this goes back many years.
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Old 2nd October 2017, 11:09 AM   #4
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I don't know that you are necessarily in the wrong, or owe it to her to tell you where you're going.

But I do know if I was talking to someone and they left the country on a boat without telling me I would probably be a little annoyed.
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Old 2nd October 2017, 11:14 AM   #5
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You have dinner every couple of weeks, texting every couple of days, sending flowers, etc. So what is it that you two doing? is the question you should be asking yourself.......
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Old 2nd October 2017, 11:37 AM   #6
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Depends on what your objective is -- if you're just friends then you are not obligated to tell her anything or how much time you take with responding. If you/both are hoping to rekindle, then it would have been nice to at least be told that you would be out of pocket for 4 days. It signals to her that she or communication wasn't much of importance to you.
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Old 2nd October 2017, 10:04 PM   #7
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You go to dinner every couple of weeks, exchange texts every 2-3 days, sent her flowers, and then shut down completely for four days (I'm guessing more) and wonder why she's upset?

First of all, how do you have dinners every other week and text 2-3 times a week and this vacation never came up?? Honestly, I can't figure out how this never came up...never! How does that happen? This is a major event in your life that's coming up, and it was never even mentioned, not even in passing??

Yeah, I would be seriously miffed. You're vague, hiding things, and not even behaving as a friend, let alone something more. I'm guessing some of your coworkers, some of which you're not close to, knew about this cruise but this person you sent flowers to because she was feeling under the weather didn't?? That's just nuts!

Figure out what you want and treat her as such. You basically brushed her under the rug. If you want to rekindle something with her, letting her in on your life is a good start.

Game playing to the max, sending flowers and bailing...oh and here's a fun pic from my trip I never told you about despite planning it for weeks! Enjoy!

Turn the tables...how would you feel if she exhibited this behavior towards you?
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