Dating - Making the Move

[JohnJaz30]

Hello. Here's the situation.

I met a girl (around 27 yo) about 8-9 months ago at a business gathering. We were all having coffee and talked about business and exchanged phone numbers.

At that time, I wanted to ask her out but I was having some personal issues which I wanted to sort out first. Now, all things are sorted out and I feel that I am ready. I believe that she is still single and I want to ask her out. Note that I haven't been in touch with her since back then. I'm 32 and I haven't been on the dating scene for over 2 years now.

 

How do I make contact with her again without sounding desperate? Should I text her and ask her if she would like to join me for coffee sometime; and then ask her out in person? Should I ring her instead? Given that I've already met her once, should I ask her out directly on the phone ? What's the best approach?

Thanks in advance for any advice.

John

[d0nnivain]

27 year olds that you meet at business functions are grown women, not girls.

 

Give that 3/4 of a year has passed & she has no reason to know that you didn't ask her out then because you had personal problems that needed to be resolved, she will off course think it's very odd that you are popping up out of the blue all these months later. Although you have always thought of her she may have no clue who you are. All that negativity aside, just go for it. Call her. Remind her who you are. Ask her for coffee but don't get your hopes up: she may very well have met somebody new & no longer be available. If you don't act all mealy & weird, she'll just think you have confidence.

 

Do not text her. She is a professional work colleague. Texting as an opening gambit does not project professionalism, confidence or maturity.

 

Whatever your personal problem was do not discuss it with her or give any explanation about where you have been all this time. If it was so big that it took all this time to work through & so personal that you didn't tell her then, there is no point in vomiting such intimacies early on now. If it's still bothering you, confess after your first dating anniversary; then it will be a "funny" story. Now it will just look weak & lame (unless it was something like you were waiting for your divorce to be finalized)

[Cookiesandough]

No wait, just be like "hey it's x from xxx. We met..."

Edited August 17, 2017 by Cookiesandough

[JohnJaz30]

27 year olds that you meet at business functions are grown women, not girls.

 

Give that 3/4 of a year has passed & she has no reason to know that you didn't ask her out then because you had personal problems that needed to be resolved, she will off course think it's very odd that you are popping up out of the blue all these months later. Although you have always thought of her she may have no clue who you are. All that negativity aside, just go for it. Call her. Remind her who you are. Ask her for coffee but don't get your hopes up: she may very well have met somebody new & no longer be available. If you don't act all mealy & weird, she'll just think you have confidence.

 

Do not text her. She is a professional work colleague. Texting as an opening gambit does not project professionalism, confidence or maturity.

 

Whatever your personal problem was do not discuss it with her or give any explanation about where you have been all this time. If it was so big that it took all this time to work through & so personal that you didn't tell her then, there is no point in vomiting such intimacies early on now. If it's still bothering you, confess after your first dating anniversary; then it will be a "funny" story. Now it will just look weak & lame (unless it was something like you were waiting for your divorce to be finalized)

 

Thanks a lot for your insights and advice. Much appreciated.