I'm not sure if I went too far texting a girl I've hung out with

[letmein]

So this girl and I have hung out several times, usually late into the night. One time when we were hanging out she told me she imagined us having sex in this risky place. It was her "fantasy". We haven't talked too much about it since then. Starting today however, we won't see each other for a month (both of us are taking vacations that overlap each others. Mine starting today, hers next week). So yesterday, I texted her to see if she wanted to hang out late last night. She agreed but got stuck at work so she couldn't make it.

 

So I texted her to have a good time on vacation and that next time I see her we're definitely fulfilling her fantasy. She hasn't texted me anything back. She's never been a big texter, but she's usually at least answered my texts in some way.

 

So I don't know if I should text her something back. Her silence is starting to make me feel a little creepy about the last text. I don't want to be the psycho sending multiple texts, but maybe something like making a joke about what I said or defusing my advances a bit? We usually only text when we want to meet up and hang out so I probably won't text/hear from her again for at least a month. I don't want her to have a bad taste in her mouth from what I said or be creeped out by me texting that for the whole month. Advice?

 

TL;DR - Won't see a girl for a month. Texted her we're definitely fulfilling her sexual fantasy next time we meet up. She hasn't texted back. Should I text her again or leave it alone for a month?

[Erik30]

If you never had sex with her, she might be a bit creeped out by that text. Especially if you never made a move before, and you aren't even dating. It could have been just a thing she once said when she was drunk, now you made it real.

 

I would wait at least a week for her to reply, then just wish her a nice holiday. Act like that last text never happened if she didn't reply.

 

I guess at least she knows your intentions now... are you two actually dating or was it just "hanging out?"

[phineas]

i'm just going to take a stab here and say you hung out with this woman, never made a move and out of the blue she says this?

 

If so i got bad news for you.

she is used to men hitting on her asap.

you did not so she felt you were either scared of women or not attracted to her so she chit-tested you to see what you would do.

 

i'm assuming you did nothing.

women who say things like this expect a real man to call her bluff and say "ok, let's go" then disregard when the woman waffles because real men don't waste their time on dic-teases.

 

then if she does want you she will chase and you will close the deal.

 

it's happened to me a dozen times.

 

but you did it over text.

kind of un-manly i'm guessing according to her.

She probably has done this to a bunch of guys to get them chasing her.

 

If it were me i'd not text her again and if you don't hear from her so be it.

you think you went to far?

She went too far first by bringing it up.

 

but let's be real here, do you really want to associate with a woman who dangles a sex carrot in front of you for your attention?

Edited July 1, 2017 by phineas

[SevenCity]

i'm just going to take a stab here and say you hung out with this woman, never made a move and out of the blue she says this?

 

If so i got bad news for you.

she is used to men hitting on her asap.

you did not so she felt you were either scared of women or not attracted to her so she chit-tested you to see what you would do.

 

i'm assuming you did nothing.

women who say things like this expect a real man to call her bluff and say "ok, let's go" then disregard when the woman waffles because real men don't waste their time on dic-teases.

 

then if she does want you she will chase and you will close the deal.

 

it's happened to me a dozen times.

 

but you did it over text.

kind of un-manly i'm guessing according to her.

She probably has done this to a bunch of guys to get them chasing her.

 

If it were me i'd not text her again and if you don't hear from her so be it.

you think you went to far?

She went too far first by bringing it up.

 

but let's be real here, do you really want to associate with a woman who dangles a sex carrot in front of you for your attention?

 

This is spot on. Worst thing you can do is backpedal. It will make you come off as insincere, or worse, a lesser man who does not go for what he wants.

 

Let it sit and don't bring it up again. If she reaches out great - make it happen. If she doesn't reply then you can text her when she's back and leave it at that.

 

Women hate guys who talk and won't take action. It's the same reason why guys who get dumped and promise they will change get nowhere.

 

At also illustrates how women live in the moment. She may have meant it at the time but the moods change. Same when they say I love you, same when they say they'll never leave you.

 

Learn to live in the moment as well. Don't talk, take action.