Jesse101 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 This absolutely sucks... I cant stop thinking about what I should do. Iv been seeing this girl for about 2.5 weeks.. we get along great, we have went out multiple times and have a lot of fun.. but I don't think it will work out.. this took a lot and it hurt like hell to admit it to myself.. here's why.. we both work together and I came in as the new guy while she's been there for a year and already has good friendships with everyone she always talks and jokes around with the guys but she wont talk to me.. and when she does its like... stale and just dumb.. it pisses me off to be honest.. even when I hung out with her and people from work.. she talked to them but not me.. at all. its like wtf we are dating and your not talking to me..... its a completely different story when we are alone.. we talk a lot and like I said have fun.. but its like night and f*cking day... I kissed her twice and still she doesn't show any emotion toward me.. honestly I just don't think I can deal with that behavior.. i don't blame her or anything I still like her and all but I think I should just back off and let her come to me because im the one always texting and initiating convos. it hurts so bad because I love this girl I want things to work out so bad but I just don't think it will.. I though she could be the one I was looking for all this time.. i don't know if I should let it fall off or fight for it.. the thing is is that its all me.. she doesn't think any of this and thinks we are great.. iv brought up things like if she's even happy that we met and does she want to be in a relationship.. she said yes but doesn't want to rush anything.. i just cant take the behavior.. iv thought about capping the whole thing for my sanity but i want it to work out SO BAD.. Im lost in this and I hate it. Link to post Share on other sites
kassy Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 Two and a half weeks.... Let's get things in perspective! She is probably just unsure of how to deal with having a new boyfriend at work. Just give her some time to get her head around it. And stop with all the drama. You have no idea what she's thinking so don't assume. Also, cut back on the pressure! Are you happy you met me and do you even want to be in this relationship... It's two and a half weeks!!! She is just getting to see how the relationship might go. How about you forget about all of this and just try focusing on having fun with her and doing things that are exciting together as well as some down time together. Don't be so impatient. Give things time and go show her dating you will be fun not drama. There is no need at this point to end it, just don't be so melodramatic! Link to post Share on other sites
lilmissjava Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 Never dip your pen into the office ink. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 If her actions confuse you, ask her about it in a non confrontational way Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 two and a half weeks.... Let's get things in perspective! There is no need at this point to end it, just don't be so melodramatic! repeated for truth! Link to post Share on other sites
TunaInTheBrine Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 This absolutely sucks... I cant stop thinking about what I should do. Iv been seeing this girl for about 2.5 weeks.. we get along great, we have went out multiple times and have a lot of fun.. but I don't think it will work out.. this took a lot and it hurt like hell to admit it to myself.. here's why.. we both work together and I came in as the new guy while she's been there for a year and already has good friendships with everyone she always talks and jokes around with the guys but she wont talk to me.. and when she does its like... stale and just dumb.. it pisses me off to be honest.. even when I hung out with her and people from work.. she talked to them but not me.. at all. its like wtf we are dating and your not talking to me..... its a completely different story when we are alone.. we talk a lot and like I said have fun.. but its like night and f*cking day... I kissed her twice and still she doesn't show any emotion toward me.. honestly I just don't think I can deal with that behavior.. i don't blame her or anything I still like her and all but I think I should just back off and let her come to me because im the one always texting and initiating convos. it hurts so bad because I love this girl I want things to work out so bad but I just don't think it will.. I though she could be the one I was looking for all this time.. i don't know if I should let it fall off or fight for it.. the thing is is that its all me.. she doesn't think any of this and thinks we are great.. iv brought up things like if she's even happy that we met and does she want to be in a relationship.. she said yes but doesn't want to rush anything.. i just cant take the behavior.. iv thought about capping the whole thing for my sanity but i want it to work out SO BAD.. Im lost in this and I hate it. Obsession sucks. You could try and put up with it, but my guess is that is not going to be fair to you. You seem more the communicative type, and probably need a woman who is also similar. I don't think you'll be happy with this one, even if she comes around. Link to post Share on other sites
TunaInTheBrine Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 Never dip your pen into the office ink. Ha! I just said this to someone recently too. Even when an office romance does work, it gets real awkward when there is tension in the relationship, when you can no longer vent to your colleagues about your girlfriend since she is actually part of the company, etc... it's just not a good idea. A different and smarter approach is to treat romantic interests at the office like a period of hulling where you're planting seeds of interest but never acting on them, and then pursue hard as soon as they leave the company 1 Link to post Share on other sites
StBreton Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 You could just club her over the head and drag her to your man cave:laugh: Seriously OP...as others have said, it's just 2.5 weeks. This girl might want to keep things quiet between the 2 of you till things look like they will be really long term so as not to upset the office dynamic. Also, fishing off the company pier is frowned down upon in many work environments and as she has worked at this place for a year, she knows the environment and is playing it cool...she's a smart girl and doesn't want to jeopardize her standing or job. I recommend you act maturely and play it cool as well...you don't want to jeopardize your job do you? Or this relationship? Now put that club of yours away for safe keeping:) Link to post Share on other sites
TunaCat Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 Seriously, it's only been 2.5 weeks. Relax dude. Also she may not want people in the workplace to know you two are dating. If you aren't okay with that, you need to realize that the two of you (if this relationship continues) need to discuss what's acceptable at work. Also check your employee handbook to see what the policy is on dating in the workplace. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jesse101 Posted December 1, 2015 Author Share Posted December 1, 2015 Obsession sucks. You could try and put up with it, but my guess is that is not going to be fair to you. You seem more the communicative type, and probably need a woman who is also similar. I don't think you'll be happy with this one, even if she comes around. But we do communicate and talk a lot.. Just not when we are around other people. That's the problems everyone knows it.l I guess since it's so early and she's closer to them since she known them longer but idk. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 I guess since it's so early and she's closer to them since she known them longer but idk. But you DO know! You know that you are not acting rationally. Everyone here is advising you to chill. What you are doing is reflecting your desires on her - wanting her to be as demonstrative as you are. Take a step back and get to know her better. After such a short time, you are just beginning to learn who she is; by herself, with you, and in the confines of being within groups. Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 But we do communicate and talk a lot.. Just not when we are around other people. That's the problems everyone knows it.l I guess since it's so early and she's closer to them since she known them longer but idk. I dont know her but I ll speak on her behalf so please understand its only my point of view. When I liked people or were attracted to them I would always retreat a little. I became a little shy because I liked them and dodnt know how to react when I was with them. It doens tmean I was indifferent to you but was worried what you would think or give you a reason to dump me. Over time I became to let go of my inhibitions and began to me more open and being me. Just give it time. Link to post Share on other sites
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