Passion8 Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Hi. I need advice. My girlfriend broke up with me after going through my computer and discovering that I had been in communication with my ex-wife. I had lied to her about my communications. It has been about a month. It was an awful break-up and she said some really awful things to me. She mostly blocked my phone, text, etc. I made the classic mistake of pleading and telling her how much I loved her and wanted her back. She either ignored me or emailed me telling me all the ways I was awful. After a last particularly mean call about a week ago, I stopped all communication with her. Today, she emailed me saying that because we meant so much to each other for such a long time and now now that the dust has (mostly) settled, she has been wondering if it would be good for us to have a conversation to clear the air, get closure, whatever. (almost her exact words). I want her back and I don't want to play games, but I do not know if responding to her email (calling, etc) helps. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 My favorite phrase in life is "people dig their own graves". You sure did it here my friend. But I think a real response can't be had until you provide more information, otherwise we don't know enough to really begin to help and offer something than our own jaded responses based solely on our own experiences. 1. How long were you and the ex-wife married? 2. Any kids with ex-wife? 3. How long between split and then dating ex g/f 4. How long you and ex g/f together 5. Why did you contact ex-wife? 6. Why did you lie? 7. What did ex g/f say? (can be general) 8. What's ex g/f history? 9. What's your other situations - work, career, money, family, etc Link to post Share on other sites
LostOnes05 Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Don't respond to the email. She has your number let her call you. Sure, you screwed up. But hearing someone out doesn't take much. I stopped communicating with women via text or email during arguments. You guys are both mature adults and should be able to speak on the phone to sort things out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Passion8 Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 Yes, I certainly dug my own grave. I am not denying that. Here are the answers to your questions. I should note that there is a 20 year difference in age between me and my ex gf (47/m - 27/f) My favorite phrase in life is "people dig their own graves". You sure did it here my friend. But I think a real response can't be had until you provide more information, otherwise we don't know enough to really begin to help and offer something than our own jaded responses based solely on our own experiences. 1. How long were you and the ex-wife married? 15 years 2. Any kids with ex-wife? yes, 2 3. How long between split and then dating ex g/f 8 months 4. How long you and ex g/f together 6 months 5. Why did you contact ex-wife? She was reaching out and wanted to get back together and while I did not want to, it was nice having her keep asking. So, being candid, I kept her dangling. I didn't really know this was my motivation until after my gf broke it off. 6. Why did you lie? I knew that my gf was really concerned that I would get back with my ex-wife and so I lied. Stupid, self-destructive - but I lied. 7. What did ex g/f say? (can be general) In this latest email, that she blocked me for a month because she needed time. Now that the dust is settled, she would like to have a call to "get closure, move on or whatever.." Because we meant so much to each other, she thinks a call would be helpful to both of us. 8. What's ex g/f history? A series of abusive boyfriends... 9. What's your other situations - work, career, money, family, etc Link to post Share on other sites
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