SJ69 Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 My current girlfriend and I have been together almost 9mos now and it started rocky. She was talking to a couple guys and I was speaking to a couple girls and just not very relationship like things. But then we cleared up and are much better now. However, her mom was uneasy of the relationship at first and was being informed from my girlfriends sister that her and I got into a physical argument once, which wasn't anything but pushing but granted happened nonetheless, and now she chooses not the respect the relationship and holds my girlfriend back from doing things with me or coincidentally has something to get into the way of our plans. What do I do? I accept both of our pasts was wrong but this is now obstructing my relationship that is going greatly and causing a big problem to me. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 How old are you? Any physical altercation is going to raise red flags with your GF's family. Going forward if you want to win the mom's trust you have to be extra gracious & deferential. Talk to the mom. Apologize to her. Win her trust so she lets her daughter do more things with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 How old are you? Any physical altercation is going to raise red flags with your GF's family. Going forward if you want to win the mom's trust you have to be extra gracious & deferential. Talk to the mom. Apologize to her. Win her trust so she lets her daughter do more things with you. If you push my daughter there is NO amount of graciousness and apologies that will win my trust again. OP: She will never accept you. In her eyes you will ALWAYS be the loser that pushed her daughter. She will always look down on you. That's how it is and you cannot change it. Every time your girlfriend complains about something her mother will destroy you in front of her eyes. You better start new with a new girlfriend and this time get a grip over yourself when you're mad. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
giblesp Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 My current girlfriend and I have been together almost 9mos now and it started rocky. She was talking to a couple guys and I was speaking to a couple girls and just not very relationship like things. But then we cleared up and are much better now. However, her mom was uneasy of the relationship at first and was being informed from my girlfriends sister that her and I got into a physical argument once, which wasn't anything but pushing but granted happened nonetheless, and now she chooses not the respect the relationship and holds my girlfriend back from doing things with me or coincidentally has something to get into the way of our plans. What do I do? I accept both of our pasts was wrong but this is now obstructing my relationship that is going greatly and causing a big problem to me. Don't go pushing your girlfriend. If she pushes you walk away, when you've both calmed down make a golden rule that there will be no physical violence in the relationship.(If a girlfriend was to get physically violent, I'd end it on the spot.) If both of you cant stick to that, the relationship must end. Link to post Share on other sites
giblesp Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 I dont know who pushed who first, but a man who starts a physical fight with a woman deserves to get beaten up. We're physically stronger, and with that comes responsibility. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 I wouldn't let my daughter date someone who had a physical altercation with...in fact it would be my instinct to protect her. I agree with Gaeta, there isn't enough sucking up that would make me change my mind. Healthy relationships don't start of rocky or have ups and downs. IMO you both still have some growing up to do. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 If your GF was my daughter I would do everything I could to make sure that your relationship ended. Sorry, you might be a really great guy. But as a father I just can't take that chance Once you get physically violent with a parents daughter - that's it. The end. Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 There's nothing to make a family member more defensive then physical and/or verbally abusive altercations. You could be and might be a sweet guy, but no matter what happened or why - you could even have just pushed her because she was up in your space and all crazy - the mom will probably never trust you or it would take years. Seriously, if the girl is that interested in you and if the altercation was her fault, she'd make it a point to ignore her mom and just do it. If she doesn't, then she's either too attached to her(which wouldn't be good for lots of reasons) or she's not that into you. I agree with the other posters - a golden haired boy will still come out the devil - even if the daughter was insane. I saw that with the relationship I just ended. No physical altercations, but the parents had so long ago given up on the woman that even a saint would not have been enough for them. She screamed and even tore up her own kitchen once - but I never hit her - no matter what you have to be the "man" and never hit a woman. Unless she's got a knife or she's attacking someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
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