Financially unstable.

[Spoonss]

I have a great girlfriend who ive been seeing for 5 months now. I take her out on dates and we hang out alot, she even supports me with me choosing to not drink and she even comes and waits with me when I go to a Therapy session once a month to deal with some ****ty things in my past. But all that aside I recently am just building myself back up from nothing I am in my mid 20's and had to move in with my rents a year ago because I couldnt support myself. Long story short I just dont want my living situation to **** up an amazing relationship. She sais its not a problem and that we'll figure it out. But to be honest it does put a strain on the relationship to always have to go to her place. I just needed to vent, its been stressing me out. Thanks for whoever took the time to read this.

[ClickToRead]

Hi there,

If she is being supportive of your therapy and your housing situation stick with her. I know you said it was a strain on your relationship to always go to her place...is she upset over this, or are you? There are so many people that have had to build themselves back up in recent years, so I wouldn't stress too much about it.

Do you think the strain is because you do not have money to go out and do things with her? I dated someone who had money constraints in the past. Try looking up inexpensive things to do in your area.

[barcode88]

OP it sounds like your GF really loves you, most wouldn't be OK with that situation so early in a relationship.

 

You need to take serious action to get into a good job, and make your own living arrangements. Don't take her for granted or she won't stick around forever.

 

Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do today.

[PogoStick]

You shouldn't bring it up all the time, but definitely discuss it with her. She sounds great so far. Therapy is a good sign (for both of you) and it's cool that she participates and is supportive. Tell her it's important to hear her support on this issue. And of course, since you are so bothered, what is your plan to improve your situation? What steps are you taking now?

[Hawaii51]

you probably shouldn't worry about a problem until there is one, otherwise you're going to create one, and right now you're wasting thoughts and energy on imaginary problems that have nothing to do with getting you out of the problem you're putting yourself in by worrying so much. I know, right?

[d0nnivain]

If she said it doesn't bother her, take her at her word. What will bother her is you not believing her & constantly seeking reassurance because you are insecure about it.

 

What are you doing to get your act back together? Spend your energy on that so she has concrete reasons to respect you. Stop obsessing when there is no reason to.

[Emilia]

Maybe she likes having you at her place. Guys tend to prefer come back to mine because I live quite centrally in London. I have zero problem with that, my lazy side in fact prefers it

[Spoonss]

Thanks for all the advice! Very helpful. I probably shouldnt stress it too much as you say if shes still here those things probably arnt super important to her And I just need to focus on building my life up again.

 

Answering all your questions

 

-I do currently have a job as of 2 months ago but still takes time to get back on your feet.

-We have talked about this stuff because it was causing me stress so I just told her everything that was going on in my life 3 months into the relationship.

-I was seeing a therapist for about 5 months prior to meeting her

 

Again thanks everyone for the 3rd party insight

[d0nnivain]

You have a therapist. Don't treat your GF like a 2nd amateur therapist.