p011yp0ck3t Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 I'm going to apologize in advice for how lengthy this is but I would really appreciate any advice, thoughts, opinions, about my situation.. Okay so here’s my situation… I was seeing this guy for a little over a month. He’s 25, I’m 20. He’s done with college, he works 3 jobs and he’s a rapper, he’s signed to a label and chasing his dream…. At first he kept pursuing me, and I said no due to a friend of mine who had a crush on him…. Anyways… He took me out on a date to dinner and the movies and it went really well. He took me out a couple more times after that and then he came over a couple of times…. Things went well, except he acted distant for awhile and I pointed that out to him and he said we would talk before he left for California. So we did and he toon me out on a date again and we talked and everything was fine. He texted me a couple of times while he was away and then he told me he would call me… And he never did so I pointed that it to him in a playful way and he called me and we were fine. He texted me on the Saturday before he came back and he said that he would see me when he came back and whatever. So I texted him when he came back on Monday saying “I miss you.” He never responded… I waited a couple of days and said “hey, idk if you’re busy or not but I need to talk to you about some stuff when you have the chance.” He told me he was working a double and asked if everything was ok and I said just call/text me when you’re done working. I never heard from him, I caved one night and asked him if he was still interested and he said this to me a day later This is what he said to me “…I love hanging out with you, don’t get me wrong but I just don’t want to lead us on to something serious.. It’s just bad timing.. I gotta be a little selfish and focus on me if that’s makes sense” I replied “Thanks for letting me know. I like hanging out with you too and now I realize I need to be a little selfish and focus on me too…have a good weekend.” So it's been 8 days since this conversation wth him... And last Saturday night he texted me saying "Funny with friends talking about girls with pretty eyes and I thought about you" I waited 2 days to answer and on Monday this was our convo... Me: Hey sorry I'm just getting back to you, been super busy but that's so sweet of you! Hope everything's been going well Him: Everything has thanks for asking Hows things with you?? Hopefully no more hospital trips Me: That's good! And everything's good but I have to go to a specialist but I'll be fine lol I'm just a little baby that's all lmfao Him:Stop no you're not! You're tough that's what you're ?? Me: Ooh you think so ? I'm about as tough as a dandelion.. Or maybe a daisy, I like daises lol ? Him: Lol ur cute Me:Lol ur cute too.. & thank you!! Him: Maybe I can see you soon.. Me: Maybe you can... Him: Hope so Me:I guess we'll have to see, I'm going to bed Him: Good night!! I then found out through my best friend he was seeing this girl from my work...she's older than me... My best friend sent me this "So you know how Ryan texted you Saturday night? At like 10pm... Well he saw Jenna that night. And begged for her to give him another shot. He pinned her to the corner and was like "please give me a shot. I really like you. You called it off too quickly" and Jenna showed me a picture. After California, he bought her home gifts from his trip. Saw her like two times. And she was going too see him three times but she blew him off to hang out with someone else." I don't know how I feel about it anymore. Right now he's in Miami, I was thinking if he doesn't try to hang out with me a couple of days after he's been back I thought of seeing if he could meet me up for lunch/dinner... This is what I am planning on saying to him... In person "Jay.. i need to ask you about something. I was totally on board when you told me you weren't interested in having a relationship right now because you wanted to focus on your career. I understood and completely backed off because I would never want to get in the way of someone following their dreams. Especially you because I know how important music is to you. And what you said seemed so honest and true that it actually made me realize that I should focus on myself for a while too. At the time, I had really started to like you because you seemed like a respectable and honest guy so I respected your decision not to be in a relationship and I really appreciated you telling me. People talk Jay, this island is small... you really think I wouldn't find out? ... The night you told me that I had pretty eyes was the night that you begged for Jenna to come back to you. I was really starting to like you at the time and it seems like you didn't even care about me enough to tell me the truth. Look I know we weren't official or anything and we never talked about where we stood with each other really but what the deal was but I'm not even mad, you lied to me, and that hurts... I just honestly thought you were different. I'm just disappointed in you Ryan. Good luck with everything and I hope you enjoy the rest of your day/night..." I would leave my money for the bill... Get up and then leave Any advice? Suggestions or thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 I'm going to apologize in advice for how lengthy this is but I would really appreciate any advice, thoughts, opinions, about my situation.. Okay so here’s my situation… I was seeing this guy for a little over a month. He’s 25, I’m 20. He’s done with college, he works 3 jobs and he’s a rapper, he’s signed to a label and chasing his dream…. At first he kept pursuing me, and I said no due to a friend of mine who had a crush on him…. Anyways… He took me out on a date to dinner and the movies and it went really well. He took me out a couple more times after that and then he came over a couple of times…. Things went well, except he acted distant for awhile and I pointed that out to him and he said we would talk before he left for California. So we did and he toon me out on a date again and we talked and everything was fine. He texted me a couple of times while he was away and then he told me he would call me… And he never did so I pointed that it to him in a playful way and he called me and we were fine. He texted me on the Saturday before he came back and he said that he would see me when he came back and whatever. So I texted him when he came back on Monday saying “I miss you.” He never responded… I waited a couple of days and said “hey, idk if you’re busy or not but I need to talk to you about some stuff when you have the chance.” He told me he was working a double and asked if everything was ok and I said just call/text me when you’re done working. I never heard from him, I caved one night and asked him if he was still interested and he said this to me a day later This is what he said to me “…I love hanging out with you, don’t get me wrong but I just don’t want to lead us on to something serious.. It’s just bad timing.. I gotta be a little selfish and focus on me if that’s makes sense” I replied “Thanks for letting me know. I like hanging out with you too and now I realize I need to be a little selfish and focus on me too…have a good weekend.” So it's been 8 days since this conversation wth him... And last Saturday night he texted me saying "Funny with friends talking about girls with pretty eyes and I thought about you" I waited 2 days to answer and on Monday this was our convo... Me: Hey sorry I'm just getting back to you, been super busy but that's so sweet of you! Hope everything's been going well Him: Everything has thanks for asking Hows things with you?? Hopefully no more hospital trips Me: That's good! And everything's good but I have to go to a specialist but I'll be fine lol I'm just a little baby that's all lmfao Him:Stop no you're not! You're tough that's what you're ?? Me: Ooh you think so ? I'm about as tough as a dandelion.. Or maybe a daisy, I like daises lol ? Him: Lol ur cute Me:Lol ur cute too.. & thank you!! Him: Maybe I can see you soon.. Me: Maybe you can... Him: Hope so Me:I guess we'll have to see, I'm going to bed Him: Good night!! I then found out through my best friend he was seeing this girl from my work...she's older than me... My best friend sent me this "So you know how Ryan texted you Saturday night? At like 10pm... Well he saw Jenna that night. And begged for her to give him another shot. He pinned her to the corner and was like "please give me a shot. I really like you. You called it off too quickly" and Jenna showed me a picture. After California, he bought her home gifts from his trip. Saw her like two times. And she was going too see him three times but she blew him off to hang out with someone else." I don't know how I feel about it anymore. Right now he's in Miami, I was thinking if he doesn't try to hang out with me a couple of days after he's been back I thought of seeing if he could meet me up for lunch/dinner... This is what I am planning on saying to him... In person "Jay.. i need to ask you about something. I was totally on board when you told me you weren't interested in having a relationship right now because you wanted to focus on your career. I understood and completely backed off because I would never want to get in the way of someone following their dreams. Especially you because I know how important music is to you. And what you said seemed so honest and true that it actually made me realize that I should focus on myself for a while too. At the time, I had really started to like you because you seemed like a respectable and honest guy so I respected your decision not to be in a relationship and I really appreciated you telling me. People talk Jay, this island is small... you really think I wouldn't find out? ... The night you told me that I had pretty eyes was the night that you begged for Jenna to come back to you. I was really starting to like you at the time and it seems like you didn't even care about me enough to tell me the truth. Look I know we weren't official or anything and we never talked about where we stood with each other really but what the deal was but I'm not even mad, you lied to me, and that hurts... I just honestly thought you were different. I'm just disappointed in you Ryan. Good luck with everything and I hope you enjoy the rest of your day/night..." I would leave my money for the bill... Get up and then leave Any advice? Suggestions or thoughts? I was totally on board when you told me you weren't interested in having a relationship right now I understood and completely backed off I know we weren't official we never talked about where we stood with each other You aren't breaking up with this guy. There's nothing to break up from. Don't say anything to him. Do not contact him again and if he contacts you do not respond. He told you you had pretty eyes ., . . that's all! Please don't do anything. You will be making a fool of yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Wow.. I can't believe I actually read that whole thing. Bottom line is that he's a player that likes having multiple women on the hook. You're lucky to have a friend that watches your back like that. Now my advice is that if you do like him more than you're letting on (which I think is the case), it's better to just move on. I mean if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a duck. It's not like you're going to suddenly change him like women seem to think they can do. A guy shows who he is through his actions plain and simple. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author p011yp0ck3t Posted March 27, 2015 Author Share Posted March 27, 2015 Well this is the thing... He lied to me and I want to call him out on it, in a mature way obviously. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Well this is the thing... He lied to me and I want to call him out on it, in a mature way obviously. There's no rule that says you can't. If you want to do it, do it, but don't waste any more time thinking about him beyond that. You're just another girl to him. Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 mature? no, just leave it, you were not even exclusive, mature ppl would already know the score, as it was just a passing phase, sorry, but save your time 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Looks like you have a double thread going. Here's my response from the other one: That monologue would sure be fun to deliver wouldn't it? But let's be honest for a second - that monologue only really works in your imagination and books. It never goes down like that in real life. Plus, the guy doesn't deserve even that much attention from you. The dude is a sweet talking player. You're Plan B or C or D. Don't waste another second of effort on him. You got played a little, but not that much - didn't sound like you slept with him. Just delete and block. If you must respond to him just say "sorry dude, you lost you chance" and that's it. Side Comment: I am always amazed by the people on LS (usually but not always woman) who are SHOCKED and AGAHST to discover that the DJ, rapper, musician, etc turns out to be a player or not to conform to normal dating behavior. Um... hello? I remember one lady on here was upset that the successful DJ she had been on a few dates with wasn't putting in the effort to woo her. For a successful DJ, saying "wanna hang?" basically constitutes major effort. Link to post Share on other sites
wizer Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Well this is the thing... He lied to me and I want to call him out on it, in a mature way obviously. He won't care. Link to post Share on other sites
barcode88 Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play Link to post Share on other sites
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