Years without dating or sex.

[User15]

Hello everyone. New user here. Here's my story that drove me to come here.

 

I first lost my virginity at 18 with a girlfriend I had for a short while during high school and we broke up four months or so after I graduated.

 

I'm 22 now, about halfway to 23, which makes that about 4 1/2 years ago. Over that time I had have not had any sort of intimate relationship with anyone; no girlfriend, no sex, nothing. While I did have a few attempts at dating other girls they never went anywhere. For most of that time it never bothered much me mainly because I never gave it much serious thought. I was too busy focusing on work, school, and having fun doing other things.

 

A few weeks ago however the realization finally struck me. I've been single and celibate (not by choice, it's just how things happened) for that long? Holy ****. It now bothers me alot. I talk to my two best friends and here their stories about love, sex, and relationships and it makes me feel worse about it, like I'm sort of relationship / sex pariah.

 

I guess my questions are: is this really unusual for a guy my age? Is it strange? Is there anyone here around my age that has gone that long without relationships or sex for years at a time?

[neowulf]

Hello everyone. New user here. Here's my story that drove me to come here.

 

I first lost my virginity at 18 with a girlfriend I had for a short while during high school and we broke up four months or so after I graduated.

 

I'm 22 now, about halfway to 23, which makes that about 4 1/2 years ago. Over that time I had have not had any sort of intimate relationship with anyone; no girlfriend, no sex, nothing. While I did have a few attempts at dating other girls they never went anywhere. For most of that time it never bothered much me mainly because I never gave it much serious thought. I was too busy focusing on work, school, and having fun doing other things.

 

A few weeks ago however the realization finally struck me. I've been single and celibate (not by choice, it's just how things happened) for that long? Holy ****. It now bothers me alot. I talk to my two best friends and here their stories about love, sex, and relationships and it makes me feel worse about it, like I'm sort of relationship / sex pariah.

 

I guess my questions are: is this really unusual for a guy my age? Is it strange? Is there anyone here around my age that has gone that long without relationships or sex for years at a time?

 

My advice. Don't go down the rabbit hole of comparing your life and experiences with other people.

 

What's normal for me isn't necessarily normal for you. And vice versa.

 

All this has really pointed out is "Yes, I feel ready to date again". How long you've gone without a date is meaningless. You're not being graded on this stuff.

[Phoe]

I don't think it's unusual. I went from when I was barely 18 until I was almost 24 without a relationship. About 6 years.

[fitnessfan365]

I had two GF's from 19-22, Then didn't date at all until I was 29. For the last five years I dated and had sex pretty regularly. But that was until I met my last GF, Definitely the hottest, sweetest, most loyal woman I ever had. She was the only woman I introduced to my parents too, so it was serious.

 

But in the end, I had to break up with her because we were just too different. So for the last year I abstained from women/sex to take the time I needed to truly get over her. There's a small part of me that will always miss/want her. However, I'm finally at a place now where I won't weigh any new women down with baggage. I think one problem is some people just jump from one relationship to then next without getting over their ex, and it causes problems.

[barcode88]

At least you've lost your V Card lol. That seems to be the biggest sticking point for guys on here who are well into their mid 20s early 30s without any dating experience.

 

I don't think it's bad that you've been out of the game so long, you'll do fine.

 

This year I've started dating again for the first time in 2 years (stopped due to being really busy / life circumstances), and I feel great

[mightycpa]

My advice. Don't go down the rabbit hole of comparing your life and experiences with other people.

 

What's normal for me isn't necessarily normal for you. And vice versa.

 

All this has really pointed out is "Yes, I feel ready to date again". How long you've gone without a date is meaningless. You're not being graded on this stuff.

 

I don't think OP ever said that. He's just marvelling at how different he is.

 

OP, I would only suggest that if one or both of those two best buddies of yours is your hand, then maybe you should consider getting yourself a girlfriend or two. But if you've not been engaging in constant masturbation during these past 5 of the horniest years of your life, I'd have to conclude it isn't a big deal to you.