mbee Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 I've been on 3 dates with this guy for the last month due to BOTH of our busy schedules. Each date goes on for a very long time (the last one being 16 hours). We do connect really well and have amazing emotional/physical attraction. There hasn't been any sex, but lots of passionate making out and cuddling. Our last date was over a week ago, and he texted and called me a couple of times since then which is good. He warned me that the next month was going to be very busy for him and said that he may not be able to see me for some time. He's going on holiday for a week, hosting his family who is taking a holiday to see him, and so on. I also have a really busy schedule and this week alone, I would only have maybe 2 days to see him if he decided to meet up. I've noticed the texts and calls died down once his family came to visit half way around the world. This is normal since I knew he'd be busy hosting them and he hasn't seen them in over a year, and is very close to his family. I haven't heard from him in almost 5 days. I was also gone this entire weekend and my phone was dead for 2 days. I rarely initiate texts since I like the guy to make more of an effort, but realized he might like a text asking how his weekend was and how his family is doing. It had also been 4 days since I heard from him, so figured I need to swallow my pride a bit and show my interest. Anyway I sent him a brief text asking how he was. He usually replies in 1-2 hours, but this time he hasn't replied at all. It's been almost 12 hours so there is a good chance he'll still reply but the last 5 days have made me realize that this guy might not be nearly as responsive/available as he's been beforehand which does affect my attraction towards him and my opinion of if there is potential there. If that's the case, what do you suggest? I'm still dating other guys and have another date tomorrow night actually, but I'm the type where after a time I just mentally give up and become not interested in a guy if we don't interact enough in the beginning stages of dates. However, I know his situation is unique and I also know that I'm a very busy woman as well, so perhaps it may be best to just assume that if things continue with this guy, that it won't be for another several weeks, and that I should maybe give him a chance once things calm down for him? Again, I'm mainly asking since normally I'd just give up on the guy, move on and not look back. Link to post Share on other sites
WonderWoman911 Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 His behaviors don't seem normal. First I would hope that he's alright. You haven't heard from him in 5 days? That's really strange and not good to go so long from not hearing from him. How about you call give him a call. I'm also thinking about when you mention his "family", what comes to my mind is a wife, or an ex-wife, or a girlfriend, children, etc. I could be wrong, it's just a thought. But why is it that once his family came, the calls and texts died down. That would have me wondering. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SunnySide0418 Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 It doesn't make sense that he can't at least shoot you a quick text to stay in touch just because he's on vaca or has family visiting. Something else is going on. If he was that interested he would want to touch base. Good thing you're dating others. This treatment would turn me off. You deserve better! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Pinkdisney Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 Could just be right guy, wrong time, but relationships need to move forward to survive, not stall after a 3rd date with no text or talking. Sounds like he is making an excuse. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lovexocoach Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 Give him the benefit of the doubt. He had the decency to warn you of his upcoming busy schedule. You have no idea what's happening in his life right now. And keep in mind, you're not in a relationship. You're in the getting to know him stage. If he resurfaces, pick things up from there and see what happens. If he doesn't resurface then you haven't invested much into it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mbee Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 Thanks all! I just saw your replies so my apologies for not responding. He did text me back and initiated a few texts since then. He also apologized for being not as available as he normally is (I made no mention of my disappointment, he brought it up himself), and explained his schedule. He said he'll make time to see me this week since his Mom will be staying with another family member for awhile and he'll have more privacy and more time to spend with me. His behaviors were not suspicious before his family came, but anything can happen. And yes, went on another great date with a different guy last Wednesday who is also trying to schedule dates in. Keeping my options open in the meantime. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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