Overthinking positive and negative signs

[Smile87]

Hello - thanks for reading and for your responses.

 

I have a crush on my coworker. Sigh! For me, it took awhile for me to notice him, but he's really grabbed my attention and it's honestly so refreshing having him in my life as a coworker and a budding friend.

 

When we first started working together, I felt like he had a crush. He always went out of his way to speak with this childlike grin on his face. At the time I was seeing someone else and brushed it off. Then one day, we went out for lunch and his presence captivated me. I began to watch him and his mannerisms and started to crush back. We've always had a very teasing relationship. He always has to say something sarcastic to me and it's fun because I enjoy things like that. However, now that I'm crushing I'm having doubts on if some of the things that made me think he liked me I was misreading.

 

We exchanged numbers and begain communicating by text. Our conversations are mostly safe and in the beginning they would get flirty, but seemed playful and never crossed the line (use of the word 'bae', hearts and kisses emojis). He always seemed to keep the convo going which I appreciate. However, I ALWAYS initiate despite the fact that he keeps the convo up asking questions and transitioning to different subjects.

 

We went to lunch alone once and he told me he felt nervous because it was his first time "being nice" to me (not sarcastic lol). His body language got really shy. In this convo we discussed some personal things such as our race and religious differences. He told me his mother would be upset if he didn't bring someone of his nationality home...then he told changed it and said never mind, it's his religion that matters most. I made a mental note. Later in a text convo I asked if he ever dated my race before and he said he never had the opportunity but told me about one girl he did like. I took that as a positive sign.

 

A few weeks later, we went on a company trip. We ended up sitting together on the flight playing games and talking. There was flirtatious behavior...winking, etc. During the trip, it got a little touchy feely...holding each other, playing in hair...but no actual move was made.

 

After the trip, I got the guts to invite him to an event I had tickets for. He declined because of his religion and it being a holy month. His response however caught me off guard because it came off rude, he apologized, but I made a mental note to fall back. In doing so, things have gotten weird. We go days without acknowledging each other at work. The glances at work look longingly but he doesn't do anything. Sometimes I'll break the ice and he'll respond positively with a smile and extended chatter. Sometimes texts are exchanged, but it's not the same as before. There are more unanswered texts now.

 

His holy month is ending and he mentioned going back out to lunch. I look forward to things going back to normal with alone time, but I wish I just knew if he liked me. Is it a work friendship that I'm reading too far into, or is he on the fence about me as I am him... And if so how do we move forward.

 

I also haven't mentioned aside from race and religion differences, I am also older than him by three years (he's fresh out of college). These things shouldn't matter, but realistically they can make a person apprehensive.

[Philosoraptor]

Sounds like the attraction is there. He told you his religious reason, then apologized for possibly coming off rude.

 

If you like him then ditch your little mental note to "back off" and just go for it. We don't often get what we want in life without putting in the effort. Waiting is just time lost.

[Smile87]

Thanks for that. I guess I am overthinking and nervous about moving forward.