DrSimple Posted July 24, 2014 Share Posted July 24, 2014 (edited) I've been using OLD over the past year as well as in the past, it has allowed me to meet some interesting people and gain valuable experience but it has not as of yet paid off in a relationship. I think that may be changing though. I am the type who is comfortable being single, but wants to be in a relationship so I haven't been in a rush to jump in to one with just any gal. My job is very demanding so I pick and choose who to contact based on their profile and haven't been multi-dating, so I run a quality game rather than a quantity one. Two weeks ago I contacted a new woman, 23 (I am 28 as of tomorrow), over OLD with a short and thoughtful message. Received back a page reply, responded in kind, then on the third message back her way asked to meet up for coffee. I wasn't quite sure what to think about the extra-long messages, generally an indicator of high interest I was more than happy to have some meaningful conversation to build a little rapport first. That being said it was just the first thing that felt a little "different". Met up for coffee in the morning (it was the only time we could really fit in) and had some great conversation where we really clicked. Lot's of laughing, stories, and tangents. Good chemistry, yet at the end of the date she clearly was showing via body language she wasn't comfortable with a kiss so I gave her a hug. This is the second thing that I felt was a little "different" as normally having found good chemistry on the first date women are a little more receptive to a kiss. Yet I didn't let it bother me, everyone is different. There was a week between the first and second date, we usually texted back and forth a few times in the evening each day. Kept it light and fun, stayed away from "20 Questions" as I would rather have conversation in person. This is the next thing that was a little "different", normally texting is very limited in the early stages of dating from my experience. No one want's to appear more interested, so it is a game of chicken. I normally keep contact minimal, but was happy to keep things flowing given her showing initiative to keep a flow in the texting. The second date is where it came together and I understood why things seemed just a little off compared to my experiences in the past. We went for a walk down on the waterfront, had a nice breeze and more great conversation. Built up the comfort level with some light touches then held her hand as we walked, she was very comfortable with it. Sat down at a bench with a great view, went in for a kiss slowly and paused slightly before closing with a soft and sensual closed mouth kiss. Pull back a little bit, look her in the eye and give her a little wicked grin and go back in after I see she wants more. After the kiss, she snuggles into me... Then she tells me that I was her first kiss. As in, ever. This kind of blew my mind, as I never thought such a Unicorn existed. I don't particularly covet chaste or promiscuous woman, but being someone's first kiss without any foreknowledge gave me a kind of warm feeling. She said that she had been the type to focus on school, since she is just finishing up she recently started using OLD to get into the dating field. She had met a few guys, but didn't like any of them (described them as Frogs). So here I am sitting with the knowledge that I am the first guy she has let down her guard for, which tells me so many things. Luckily for her though, I do actually genuinely like her so I don't plan to abuse my position. Her inexperience in the dating/relationship world is what I believe accounts for her outlier behaviour, it shows a certain nativity of the world that is dating. So back on track, we continue our walk back and grab a bite at a cozy Italian place. More great chemistry, a bit more of a walk and some light make out as we depart. On this note she doesn't seem to be the person that puts a "price" on her sexuality, but rather genuinely hasn't wanted to pursue dating or a relationship yet. We have a third date set already, it will involve some mini-golf and a picnic on Sunday. Also prefaced it with a "hummus battle" as we both claim to make great home made versions. I am really looking forward to spending time with this woman, she is like a breath of fresh air in a world of smog. Things are simple and straightforward, plus we seem to just click on the conversational level. I don't plan to count my chickens before they hatch, but for now I am looking very optimistically at the situation. I have enough experience in the dating world to know that this feels quite a bit different, much closer to the experiences I have had with previous budding relationships rather then failed dating prospects. Just thought I would share on this unique situation, my own run in with a Unicorn. Edited July 24, 2014 by DrSimple 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 24, 2014 Share Posted July 24, 2014 Slow down cowboy You have plenty of dating experience but she doesn't. Chances are she is going to start growing wings and will want to use them at some point. Enjoy the moment and keep one foot on the ground. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author DrSimple Posted July 24, 2014 Author Share Posted July 24, 2014 (edited) Slow down cowboy You have plenty of dating experience but she doesn't. Chances are she is going to start growing wings and will want to use them at some point. Enjoy the moment and keep one foot on the ground. Yes indeed. I will enjoy the moment for what it is, I have long since learned not to over invest early as you tend to end up getting burned. To be fair though I was a late bloomer myself, I have plenty of dating experience but have kept the number of sexual partners to a minimum (single digits). I am hardly a "grizzled veteran" of the dating world, just someone who knows how to read people and learn from his experiences. Edited July 24, 2014 by DrSimple Link to post Share on other sites
Author DrSimple Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 *** UPDATE *** It has been a little over 5 weeks since we first met. Been out together about twice each week. Things progressed each time we met, we have had "sex" but I have not yet taken her literal virginity but that is coming soon... Mostly due to the fact we haven't had the opportunity for the right moment to make it special (I want to make it special for her). We are officially boyfriend and girlfriend, and we already said our "I love you"s. The date after our one month, I was feeling it and I was sure she did too and decided not to wait, did it spontaneously. It is quite soon by many standards, but it felt right for me at the time. She has met some of my family, and I some of hers. We talk on the phone almost even evening. This feels so natural, it is hard to put into words. It isn't an infatuation... I have been hit hard by that before but this is more wholesome. We love each others company, it doesn't matter what we do we can spend hours talking about nothing. Affection is plentiful from both sides. This is the most "right" I have felt about a relationship in my entire life, it is a little scary in a good way. My career is starting to take off, I have a blooming romance with an amazing woman, and I continue to make progress in bettering myself physically and mentally. I can honestly say this is the happiest I have been in my entire life. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 That's wonderful! Don't know why she waited so long to kiss, but as long as she likes it now she's tried it, bravo. Hope you two are happy for a very long time! Link to post Share on other sites
Author DrSimple Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 That's wonderful! Don't know why she waited so long to kiss, but as long as she likes it now she's tried it, bravo. Hope you two are happy for a very long time! Conservative (non-religious) family brainwashing. She conformed to the expectations that were put on her. In the past couple of years she has shed her shell and started to learn "who she is". I went through something similar in "finding myself" (different circumstances though) as well so I can really relate. Sometimes underneath that pile of ash you find some hidden embers that can light up a blazing flame, I think I found some embers. Link to post Share on other sites
ChessPieceFace Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 My condolences in advance for the day in which you too are labeled a "frog." To elaborate - her describing men that way shows that she is just another woman who treats men as the enemy, belittles them, has no compassion for them and doesn't treat them like people. Again, my condolences in advance. Link to post Share on other sites
Author DrSimple Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 My condolences in advance for the day in which you too are labeled a "frog." To elaborate - her describing men that way shows that she is just another woman who treats men as the enemy, belittles them, has no compassion for them and doesn't treat them like people. Again, my condolences in advance. I didn't know that you could psychoanalyze someone so well on the internet through a mere single passing expression they used... Bravo! Keep on trolling my friend. Link to post Share on other sites
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