How important is dress on first date?

[Fitguyinfl]

I always thought it's important to dress your best. Don't go overboard, but don't look like your taking a stroll to the grocery store either. Women, how important is a man's appearance during the first date? If he's dressed well and handsomely, does that make for a better date?

[angel.eyes]

Important!

 

I'm guessing if your date showed up in baggy sweats and an old t-shirt, there would be little attraction and probably no second date. How you dress and the first impression you leave is no different from her perspective.

[PegNosePete]

Duh. Nobody wants to date a slob.

In the immortal words of ZZ Top, every girl crazy bout a sharp dressed man.

[PogoStick]

How is this a serious question? You should be dressed appropriately for the occasion.

 

I actually went on a first date yesterday. I took her hiking in 95 degree weather. Hell no I wasn't wearing a suit. I wore basketball shorts and a sleeveless shirt. She must have been fine with my outfit since she asked me to get a drink after the hike was finished.

[Diezel]

It depends on the venue.

 

But I'd dress as if it were a job interview depending on where it is.

As a previous poster said, if you are going on a hike, you dress for that, but if you are meeting at a bar, you aren't going to show up wearing socks and sandals.

[d0nnivain]

Neat & clean are non negotiable. Appropriate for the venue is a plus. I'm flattered if I think he stepped it up a notch for me.

 

 

It's not about the cost of the outfit. I don't need it to be ripped from the pages of GQ.

[RonaldS]

I usually wear jeans and a t-shirt and if somebody doesn't like it, then eff them.

 

But that's because I'm not dropping $$$ on a first date. Go and grab a couple drinks, maybe do coffee....no 5* crap on a first date. So, no reason to dress up.

Edited July 22, 2014 by RonaldS

[Elle1975]

I always thought it's important to dress your best. Don't go overboard, but don't look like your taking a stroll to the grocery store either. Women, how important is a man's appearance during the first date? If he's dressed well and handsomely, does that make for a better date?

 

Jeans, nice shirt, shaved.

[d0nnivain]

I usually wear jeans and a t-shirt and if somebody doesn't like it, then eff them.

 

But that's because I'm not dropping $$$ on a first date. Go and grab a couple drinks, maybe do coffee....no 5* crap on a first date. So, no reason to dress up.

 

 

Everybody has to find people they are compatible with. So if that's working for you, great.

 

 

If it's not, would you be willing to put on at least a golf shirt with a collar or even a denim button down in cooler weather? I'm not asking for jacket & tie (although that's my preference --n.b. the men I dated would already have that attire on because they wore it to work & I would not expect that they changed for drinks with me after work) but some little bit of effort. This woman you aren't spending money on, still probably agonized about what to wear for you so a t-shirt might not be getting the job done.

 

 

Just offering you different perspective on how the t-shirt could be perceived.

[deathandtaxes]

As a guy, I always take note of what the lady wears on a first date. It shows how much time and effort and thought they put into it. I try to do the same thing. Groomed. Dressed for the venue. If I look like I just got out of bed or haven't showered in a day, what impression am I trying to send? First impressions carry a lot of weight.

[RonaldS]

Everybody has to find people they are compatible with. So if that's working for you, great.

 

 

If it's not, would you be willing to put on at least a golf shirt with a collar or even a denim button down in cooler weather? I'm not asking for jacket & tie (although that's my preference --n.b. the men I dated would already have that attire on because they wore it to work & I would not expect that they changed for drinks with me after work) but some little bit of effort. This woman you aren't spending money on, still probably agonized about what to wear for you so a t-shirt might not be getting the job done.

 

 

Just offering you different perspective on how the t-shirt could be perceived.

 

I wouldn't be willing to put on a denim button-down in any kind of weather under any circumstance, haha. If it's 10 degrees with a 40mph wind, I'm rolling out shirtless before I kick denim.

 

1st dates are just that...1st dates. It's a getting to know you thing, and it's not financially realistic to drop $$$ on 1st dates. I live in a city where even cheap dates are expensive. 1st dates are almost always low-key. As such, attire is low key, and any woman I go out with is aware of this as well.

 

My take on it is this: I'm confident in who I am and what I have to offer. I don't need to bedazzle somebody with my wardrobe. Same thing with cologne. However, I don't compromise, even on 1st dates, on footwear or hair. Those are pretty critical. But if I'm banking on my clothes to make the impression that I need to make, then I'm already screwed.

 

Now, if I like somebody and want to keep seeing them, then yes....I will take them to someplace really nice and wear the appropriate clothes. I think my fashion sense is in the 95th percentile, and I am fortunate enough to have the body to make it really work. But I am generally pretty casual and organic, so I lean in that direction most of the time.

 

I cannot think of one time that I showed up someplace and a woman even hinted at displeasure in my attire.

Edited July 22, 2014 by RonaldS

[d0nnivain]

Ronald S

 

 

You proved my point. It's working for you.

 

 

FWIW -- I too live in one of those places where the cheap stuff is still expensive.

 

 

The denim shirt was an example. A plain button down of any material also fits my suggestion.

 

 

My point still stands for other people -- if what you have been doing isn't getting you the results you want, try changing something little: a collared shirt vs a t-shirt. Not drastic. You still get to be yourself, just your best self.

[smackie9]

I don't see why it's such a negative thing to want to at least look respectable for a date. IMO it says a lot about a person. I feel they are making some effort, which I find flattering.

 

I can't see a man accepting a woman that shows up in her sweats, baggy hoodie and dirty flip flops, nail polish chipped, wearing very little makeup, saying accept me as I am or FU.

 

 

BTW most women find the smell of "clean" (soap, fabric softener, clothing washed in Tide) is scent enough, no need to use $$$ after shave.

[isisisweeping]

I don't care at all, but I'm a casual person.

[Gaeta]

All my first meetings are in coffee shops.

 

At this time of the year I put on a nice summer dress that advantages my figure and nice feminine shoes. I keep make up to a minimum.

 

As for the man I am meeting Jeans are excellent, cargo pants or shorts, but I would like to see him in a sport shirt or in a polo shirt. No t-shirt.

 

If you come to meet me in an over washed t-shirt it means when it was time for you to make a good impression on me you made no efforts.

[Fondue]

I had my fair share of OLD meetups and I've always preferred when girls showed up clothing they typically wear in their day-to-day lives, but be neat and purrtied up a bit. Just a noticeable touch that makes me that you put the effort in.

 

Like, if you're typically a jeans and T kind of girl, I would love to see you in your favorite pairs of jean/T that you know make you look great!

 

That's how I approached it when I met women. I usually dress well fitted jeans or dress pants and single colored well fit t-shirt or long sleeve shirts. All my shirts are just T or long-sleeve espirit in all different colors. That's it. So I wear my typical get up, but I put on my nice shoes, style my hair fashionably, and buzz my facial hair to that sexy 5o'clock shadow look. So nothing too out of the ordinary for me, I just touch myself up a bit.

 

So basically, dress like you would any other day you're meeting up with a friend, just brighten it up. If you come to meet me for a walk in the park and ice cream in your "sexiest" outfit and 5inch heels, I'd be very skeptical of you. THat's just not appropriate for a first meetup in my book. Neither is showing up in pajama pants and that same hoodie you wore since you were in 5th grade.

[soccerrprp]

Short of arriving like a total slob or flip-flops, etc. it's really dependent on the individuals. Looking back, I don't recall any of the women I've dated all decked out. But that's b/c I prefer that they be comfortable, but presentable. I figure if they look yummy, w/o having to be decked out then wowsa. Most women I've dated come in their tight jeans and a nice shirt/blouse, smelling and looking fresh, good...nothing more required.

 

I dated a woman having torn jeans, unshaven, but I did take a shower and smelled good...ended up marrying her. Everyone tolerates more or less. I say that "business" casual is a safe way to go if there are doubts.

[Ninjainpajamas]

I prefer to wear my crotch-less pants on dates.

[GemmaUK]

You don't need to dress 'up' for a first meet/date..

 

However, it's apparently more important to a woman what the man wears than it is to a man what the woman wears.

 

This can be a suit to shorts...it depends on her and her style preferences.

[bu2002]

I find a women with a good sense of style very attractive, so to me, yes it's important. Of course, dress appropriate for the venue. I always make an effort to make sure I'm neat and clean.

[Versacehottie]

For guys and girls, clothes convey who you are and where you are going in life and how you take care of yourself. They can be shorthand for a lot of the things about yourself on the 1st date (good or bad). And no doubt your date is doing the same with you about whatever you choose to wear. Mostly it's good to see if we are in realm of same type of people. Which is not to be snobby about it at all. For example, if two people show up to a date in casual, broken-in and slightly dated clothes--but they are both dressed like that, well they probably place a low level of importance on those things and have similar values in those areas and areas which extend from there. That's a good thing. I see couples like this all the time. In my case, I do care and a good level of effort from him and getting it decently right shows me we are heading in same direction and have similar values with regards to these things. He doesn't have to get it perfect--almost all (all?!!) my bfs have wanted my style help a certain point into the relationship.

 

So if you are trying to attract a stylish girl, then probably safe to assume she will be looking for a certain level of stylish-ness in you too. Basically be your best self, keeping the venue in mind. Be yourself though. If you are not into presenting yourself (via clothes and grooming) in an overly attentive way, fair enough--in fact, it can be a good thing to weed out girls that care about that to just come as you are, putting little attention to it. Maybe you find that a superficial way to be. I think the best matches will be people who hold relatively similar views on what the answer to this question is and look like the come from the same realm.