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Female coworker has been hanging out a lot and I think she likes me, but has a b/f


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Old 5th April 2014, 10:54 AM   #1
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Female coworker has been hanging out a lot and I think she likes me, but has a b/f

Sorry if this is long

So I am 19 and work overnights at a grocery store in Florida since October 2013. Anyways this 22 year old girl and her boyfriend work in the backroom together. They are planning on moving into an apartment at the beginning of May.

Anyways about 2.5 weeks ago she friended me on facebook and immediately asked if I wanted to hang out on our day off or something. I hadn't really talked to or worked with her much before that, but I said yes and we met up at some pizza buffet. Nothing fancy or anything. We both go home after that and she immediately texts me saying thank you for the good night. I soon will realize she does stuff like this a lot.

Few days later at work her boyfriend is off work and she goes out on her breaks and lunch with me and smokes. Than like an hour after we get off work he texts me saying thanks for sharing. I said no problem anytime. Then she starts asking me stuff like "why are you so nice to me" and "how can you possibly still be single" We end up hanging out later that day, she comes over and we watch a movie, and she is very cuddly, to put it mildly, which I didn't mind.
Then the next day at work I decide to go home on my lunch break and she texts me "what are you doing for lunch" and I tell her I went home and shes like "oh I really wanted to hang with you and my b/f in the breakroom" After that every single day we work together I hang out with them in the breakroom for lunch. I thought it would be awkward being with her and her b/f. Her b/f is quiet, and she told me she tells him she hangs out with me and says hes cool with it. I noticed when were together at work shes usually closer to her b/f and doesn't talk much, we usually just all sit quietly in the breakroom and what not. And one day I didn't work she text me saying "wish you were here I like having someone to socialize with. My b/f doesn't talk much"

Anyways she has worked there since December 2012 and according to her boyfriend's facebook they've been together in a relationship since May 2013. Since she friended me on facebook about two and a half weeks ago we have hung out 5 times, one of them she stayed overnight and what not, and each and every time we hung out, it was her who asked. Not me.

There was a week where we had different days off and I wasn't going to see her for 4 days. And only 2 days later she texts me saying shes thinking of skipping her band practice to come hang out with me, telling me she can't wait 2 more days to see me again. She cuddles with me some more and after she left that night she text me saying "sorry if my cuddling was awkward, I really like being close to you hopefully that isn't weird." I told her I thought it was sweet and what not.

Just 2 days ago when she slept over, we went to a movie. I asked if she wanted to hear me sing. Something I never do for anyone. I think stupid tbh when I sing. But she thought it was cute, and she started singing with me and what not. It's the fact I can act do embarassing things around her like sing and feel comfortable and have her think it's cute goes to show that I like her.

I do have feelings for her. I told her when she was asking me why I was so nice to her, I said I am usually shy and not very outgoing and she said like "bah they're losers for ignoring you, they don't know what they're missing" And honestly I feel deep down she likes me or else she wouldn't be asking me to hang out couple times every week. I don't think she wouldn't of even friended me on facebook and asked me to initially hang out if she weren't attracted to me especially since before that we hadn't really talked or anything. Not to mention she is the one who started this, and every time we have hung out she was the one that asked me. Just out of the blue one day added me on facebook and started to become very into me.

And honestly time will tell, but I really do like her and hoping deep down she will break up with her b/f or her b/f will randomly break up with her. I don't know how he feels about her hanging with me or if she truly is telling him she is hanging with me. Nor do I know how he feels about me sitting by them all the time on breaks and lunches and her smiling at me everytime we walk by each other. And the thing is they're moving into an apartment together at the beginning of May. Girls confuse me.

Girls are so confusing. I respect her b/f and he seems like a nice guy, but Deep down I do really like her and hope somehow she seperates with her b/f. I want to be more than just friends but I don't know what to do and am just confused how shes appearing to be into me when she has a b/f. I'm not the person thats going to try to break them up (I wouldn't even know how to begin to do something like that) I see them walk in together at work and I get jealous deep down.

Last edited by DeliciousPizza; 5th April 2014 at 11:04 AM..
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Old 5th April 2014, 11:11 AM   #2
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Messing around with someone you know is not single isn't cool. You need to man up and either tell her, or her boyfriend about it. Guess what, she's doing this with you behind her current boyfriend's back... she'll do it to you too. Would you rather be the guy that your girl friend is cheating on? Don't worry, you'll get your chance if you pursue this one.

Last edited by marcjb; 5th April 2014 at 11:15 AM..
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Old 5th April 2014, 11:19 AM   #3
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I'm not the one messing with her, shes the one who befriended me and asks me to hang out with her.
She isn't doing this behind her boyfriend's back. He knows I hang out with her and we all hang out together at work on our lunch break and what not. And the fact she talks about it at work in the breakroom with her b/f right there hanging out with me.
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Old 5th April 2014, 11:25 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeliciousPizza View Post
I'm not the one messing with her, shes the one who befriended me and asks me to hang out with her.
She isn't doing this behind her boyfriend's back. He knows I hang out with her and we all hang out together at work on our lunch break and what not. And the fact she talks about it at work in the breakroom with her b/f right there hanging out with me.
"I don't know how he feels about her hanging with me or if she is truly telling him she is hanging with me".


Which is it?
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Old 5th April 2014, 11:28 AM   #5
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I know she told him the night we spent the night, but I don't know about all the other times.
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Old 5th April 2014, 11:31 AM   #6
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Realize, if you get your wish, and she breaks up with her boyfriend to be with you, you'll always have to wonder who she's cuddling with behind your back.

Good luck.
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Old 5th April 2014, 11:55 AM   #7
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Talking to her, being her friend on FB, smoking with her, singing & even going to a movie with her are all OK. They are things friends do. Cuddling & having sleep overs are not OK. She's cheating on her BF with you & you are allowing it to happen. Remember if she cheats with you she will cheat on you. Be careful.

Plus since you all work together, what do you think is going to happen when her BF wakes up & figures out that you have been messing around with his GF? It will be ugly. It wouldn't chock me if he tried to punch you.

You need to be the mature man. Put your foot down. Tell her in no uncertain terms that you like her but that until she officially ends her relationship with her BF you are not willing to be the OM. Then distance yourself from her outside of work.
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Old 5th April 2014, 2:54 PM   #8
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Wouldn't you always wonder who she was cuddling and having sleepovers with if she actually did start dating you? I don't think this behaviour is appropriate of her. Also, how do you know her boyfriend knows she spent the night with you? Did she tell you that, or..?
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