fellH Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 Recently dated a girl from a class I have with her, shes 22 and I am 25, for about 3 weeks, for about 2 months we were always staring at each other and smiling, not short eye contact either, was long and I could tell something was going on between the two of us, I ended up asking her out to a date of mini golf and dinner, went great, she said she had an amazing time, and we ended up going back to her place watching a movie and making out. The second date was just as good if not better, I asked her out to a garden park and on a picnic, really got to talk about a lot of things and flirt with each other. she told me that she liked the way i made her feel and how i was acting like the man in the relationship and treating her like a women and taking the initiative. She ended up inviting me to dinner with her family that night and even called out of work to prolong the date, I was ok with it and had a great time and got along with them all very well. After dinner we went to see a movie, she put her head on my shoulder and everything, then I took her home and we made out for a bit and said goodbye for the night. Between dates i didn't contact her too much, nothing that would make me seem clingy. 5 days later in class she seemed to be acting strange, I asked her if she would like to go out the next night (Friday) to have dinner and hang out at a get together my friends were throwing, all who really wanted to meet her. The next day she texted me at work and we talked for a little bit, she ended up backing out of dinner because she didn't feel well. we also had a trip for class the next day that she was gonna meet me at my place and we would drive up state for it together that she ended up backing out of. I casually asked her if this was legitimate or if she was trying to tell me that she didn't want to see me anymore. She responded saying a old flame had reached out to her and she was confused (most likely when he found out we were dating.) But that she was really sick, I thanked her for being honest and told her I would talk to her in person at the event the next day. After the event i walked her to her car and asked her what was going on, she seemed nervous and was kind of doing a nervous laugh about the fact we were talking. she told me that some feeling she thought were gone, were not, and she was confused and scared of entering a relationship and seemed very uncertain if she was ready or not. without her asking, I ended up telling her that she needed to take time for herself and figure out what would be best for her, that we would put things on hold and she had my number when she was ready. we had talked about being honest with each other, and she legitimatly seemed very lost and confused. I have started no contact and want to give her time to figure out whats best for her. Did i handle this right, and if so when i see her in class for the next three weeks how should I act around her? Also if I don't hear from her, is there a period when its acceptable to to contact her since I initiated the NC and am the one who suggested her taking space for herself. or should i just let it go? I dont want her to think I gave up on her, her last relationship lasted 2 years and ended with her getting hurt. But i also want to be more than a friend thanks to anyone who has advice or comments Link to post Share on other sites
proseandpassion Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 Let her go for now. Sounds like she still has serious feelings for this old flame and you can't compete with someone she's already in love with. She'll return to you when she is emotionally open again and then you can begin anew. Otherwise, try to move on in your life and see other people. Link to post Share on other sites
Author fellH Posted August 1, 2012 Author Share Posted August 1, 2012 So even though I initiated the whole thing without her asking the best thing for the both of us would be just to ignore her for good, and maybe one day I will hear from her? And not wait a month or so and see how she's doing? Link to post Share on other sites
Chocolat Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 I ended up telling her that she needed to take time for herself and figure out what would be best for her, that we would put things on hold and she had my number when she was ready. Ball is in her court. Sounds as though the ex who treated her poorly is back on the scene and she has gotten back together with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author fellH Posted August 2, 2012 Author Share Posted August 2, 2012 Guess NC it is then and we will see what happens Link to post Share on other sites
Chunky Posted August 4, 2012 Share Posted August 4, 2012 Have you heard anything yet? Link to post Share on other sites
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