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Finally kissed girl I like, then she friend zoned me. Do I accept defeat?


Unbalanced

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I am going to refer to the girl I like as "O".

 

So I met O in my sophomore year of college while I was in a long distance relationship. During sophomore year I developed a heavy crush on O, but never said anything because I was in a relationship. Anyway, I only saw O when I was either drunk, or in class. So we were either studying together, or drunk together. And during drunk nights we were both really flirty...

 

Anyway, this past weekend I hung out w/ O for the first time since my girlfriend and I had broken up about 2 months ago. We were both drunk, and went to the bars alone after a birthday party. I had the BEST time with her, and in the cab I kissed her. She didn't reject it, but didn't seem to be feeling it either. Before bed, I drunk texted her saying that I like her...

 

The following morning, I was so happy about the night I just had with her, and I wanted to make it clear that even though it was a drunk text, I actually meant what I said... she responded to this saying "I like being friends with you, and I don't see you in any other way"....

 

Here's the deal. I DONT want to just accept that, and here's why...

 

1. She's never hung outside w/ me outside the contexts of the classroom or being drunk, so I know she doesn't know the true me.

 

2. I think she's just saying that to defend herself because she knows how flirty I was with her while I had a girlfriend, and therefore doesn't trust me.

 

3. We get along AND I know the attraction is there. I mean all the flirtiness really took place during drunk contexts, but doesn't drinking just amplify what the truth would've been? I always associated drinking as being a catalyst for bringing out ones true self, no?

 

4. I love her company, drunk or not, i think she's beautiful, and I think there is so much potential if she just gives me a chance, so I don't want to just give up...

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Eddie Edirol

You can keep flirting with her ifyou want, but she doesnt like you, and she doesnt WANT to like you. You most likely wont get past that, but make sure you dont delude yourself into thinking you actually have a connection. Then you can try again, and you wont expect anything.

 

Personally I think youre wasting your time.

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Eh, for now don't do anything.

 

But next time you are with her and drinking. Try to kiss her again and make it count.

 

Her reaction is everything you need.

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Sounds like you're deluding yourself into thinking she's interested.

 

If she was interested she would have said that she likes you too or that she is interested in going on a date.

 

Most likely she does not feel a connection as stated that she sees you as a FRIEND.

 

Alcohol brings people together that would not otherwise be interested in one another. It offers an easy setting for people to flirt or even kiss EVEN when one or both of them isn't interested in the person.

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Mrlonelyone

I say don't give up so easily. However if you can make your next move in person face to face that would be better. Text messaging is no way to conduct a interpersonal relationship.

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I say don't give up so easily. However if you can make your next move in person face to face that would be better. Text messaging is no way to conduct a interpersonal relationship.

 

This isn't sound advice. I would say give up and move on to the next one. Chasing just makes you seem needy, girls don't like needy guys. They want a guy who doesn't "need" them but one that "chose" them. I wouldn't stop flirting with her while you two are drunk though, who knows you could at least get some action from it.

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