ActionJackson Posted January 29, 2011 Share Posted January 29, 2011 So, you've had a first date and there's no way you want to see this person again. At the moment of goodbye, what else to you say to conclude the date? Do you say i'd like to see you again even though you don't mean it, just to avoid the awkwardness? I'd like to hear some ways on how to end a not-so-good first date so you don't have to hurt the other person's feelings but yet, you don't end up telling a fib because it's just the easiest thing to do. What do you honestly do, not what you think you should honestly do? Link to post Share on other sites
Isolde Posted January 29, 2011 Share Posted January 29, 2011 Some people have suggested a second date, even if they never ended up contacting me again. I think a better approach is to just say that you had a nice time and "take care" and all that. There are ways of being kind without giving false hope. But, also, no need to say directly that you're not interested, unless you're asked out by the other person, in which case it's best to say you're not feeling it. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 There's no one-size-fits-all answer. How do we know that the other person didn't think you were a dud too? I think it's just a thing where you try not to volunteer anything you don't want to back up. You'll probably wind up fibbing a little no matter what if you want to try to be kind and not hurt someone's feelings--like saying "I had a nice time" when the truth is you wanted to bolt hours ago. Try to exit with as little fibbing as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
depplover_1980 Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 It was nice to meet you, i'll be in touch? Link to post Share on other sites
daphne Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 I'm a girl. I just say it was nice to meet you, I had a good time (if I did.) I leave the ball in their court if they want to contact me. On my last date, the guy surprised me by asking me out and I was like a deer caught in the headlights. I wasn't interested, and I got the impression that through his lousy dating skills and mortician like personality, he wasn't either. Not the case and I ended up half heartedly just saying "Ok" to his suggestion of dinner next week. He called me out on it by text and I admitted I wasn't interested in pursuing anything romantic with him. He asked me out again anyway, because he thinks I didn't give him a chance. Per Depp's suggestion, I may block him too. Link to post Share on other sites
depplover_1980 Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 I'm a girl. I just say it was nice to meet you, I had a good time (if I did.) I leave the ball in their court if they want to contact me. On my last date, the guy surprised me by asking me out and I was like a deer caught in the headlights. I wasn't interested, and I got the impression that through his lousy dating skills and mortician like personality, he wasn't either. Not the case and I ended up half heartedly just saying "Ok" to his suggestion of dinner next week. He called me out on it by text and I admitted I wasn't interested in pursuing anything romantic with him. He asked me out again anyway, because he thinks I didn't give him a chance. Per Depp's suggestion, I may block him too. Ah just block them all, i've given myself the nickname The Blockanator because that is the button I click on the most. Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyDude Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 See how REHEARSED dating is which makes it mentally draining. Girls saying they had a good time when they know damm well they didn't. Thiat is the main reason people hate dating because it's so rehearsed and annoying Link to post Share on other sites
Duckduckgoose Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 "Thanks for (dinner and a movie) I really enjoyed it" If they call you up for another date, just respond "No thanks, I enjoyed myself that first time but I'm just not feeling another date. Thank you though." From a female's perspective. For a guy I guess it would be easy. Just drop her off a block from her house, don't walk her to the door or say goodnight. Speed off, really squeal them tires. Or use the super aggressive approach... Get all up in her personal space, try to get inside, and really lay on the "I want sexy nao!" vibe. You might get shot or pepper-sprayed, but she won't be in your life anymore. Or she might like it like that... this is a risky one. Link to post Share on other sites
lululucy Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 The last bad first date I had, he undid his seatbelt when we pulled up out front. I did the same, put my purse on my lap and said "Thanks for dinner, it was delicious. I'll, er.. see ya." I'm preeetty sure he got the drift. Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyDude Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 The last bad first date I had, he undid his seatbelt when we pulled up out front. I did the same, put my purse on my lap and said "Thanks for dinner, it was delicious. I'll, er.. see ya." I'm preeetty sure he got the drift. And that's exactly why I don't go to dinner on first dates because of the possibly of it not working out Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 "Well it was nice meeting you." That is all Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 From a female's perspective. For a guy I guess it would be easy. Just drop her off a block from her house, don't walk her to the door or say goodnight. Speed off, really squeal them tires. Or use the super aggressive approach... Get all up in her personal space, try to get inside, and really lay on the "I want sexy nao!" vibe. You might get shot or pepper-sprayed, but she won't be in your life anymore. Or she might like it like that... this is a risky one. Haha, this is so true! Link to post Share on other sites
tigressA Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 I just say "It was nice meeting you, take care." Sometimes they get the hint, sometimes not. When they don't, I tell them point-blank I'm not interested in going out again. Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyDude Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 I just say "It was nice meeting you, take care." Sometimes they get the hint, sometimes not. When they don't, I tell them point-blank I'm not interested in going out again. That's why women should pay for their own meals on Date 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 That's why women should pay for their own meals on Date 1 I agree ................. Link to post Share on other sites
paleblue Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 you just smile, give em a hug, say talk to you later, and walk away. Link to post Share on other sites
oaks Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 At the moment of goodbye, what else to you say to conclude the date? Do you say i'd like to see you again even though you don't mean it, just to avoid the awkwardness? Only say things that are true or that you intend to be true. If you had a nice time (even though you don't want to see him/her again) then say so. If it was "nice to meet you" then say that. Perhaps thank your date for taking the time to meet you (or for choosing the activity, or for paying if they did). Don't say you'll be in touch unless you really mean it, although even there you aren't promising that they'll like what you have to say when you to get in touch. I don't see any reason to ask for or agree to another date if you don't want one. Link to post Share on other sites
Knittress Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 That's why women should pay for their own meals on Date 1 Eh... I've been in college for something like the last decade and can only afford to go out to eat every couple of weeks. I think of it as a special event that I reserve for good friends. If some guy asked me out on a date and then expected me to foot my own bill, I'd be forced to turn down spending time with my friends later, and be BEYOND pissed. You ask, you pay. I assume if you're asking you can afford it. Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted January 30, 2011 Share Posted January 30, 2011 Eh... I've been in college for something like the last decade and can only afford to go out to eat every couple of weeks. I think of it as a special event that I reserve for good friends. If some guy asked me out on a date and then expected me to foot my own bill, I'd be forced to turn down spending time with my friends later, and be BEYOND pissed. You ask, you pay. I assume if you're asking you can afford it. See this is where I see a problem. If you are going on a date - you are not going for him. A date can be the beginning of a relationship. Which surprisingly both of you may be in. A date is a mutual thing. It is a nice gesture for a guy to pay but why do women see if as you are doing him a favor for going out with him? What, is he paying you for your time? Hmm,they do say prostitution is the oldest form of work, since this concept seems to be so stuck in people heads. Link to post Share on other sites
zengirl Posted January 31, 2011 Share Posted January 31, 2011 (edited) So, you've had a first date and there's no way you want to see this person again. At the moment of goodbye, what else to you say to conclude the date? Do you say i'd like to see you again even though you don't mean it, just to avoid the awkwardness? I'd like to hear some ways on how to end a not-so-good first date so you don't have to hurt the other person's feelings but yet, you don't end up telling a fib because it's just the easiest thing to do. What do you honestly do, not what you think you should honestly do? The lie is the worst. Never say you'll call, or stay in touch, or do something that you won't. That's bad form, in my opinion. I say, "Thanks for the date. It was nice meeting/seeing you." If the guy expresses interest to call again at the end of the date or calls again, I tell him the truth (not interested). I think it'd be harder for a guy. I'd prefer a guy just flat-out tell me, "I'm not going to call" (I always ask the guy to call, if I want him to, so that's a great opportunity, but not all girls do this), but a lot of girls would be outraged. So, you don't have to say you WON'T call, but never say you will if you won't. It's just mean. And don't kiss! That's why women should pay for their own meals on Date 1 If I don't dig the guy, I always do. I always go dutch if I know I don't want to see someone again. And right before I break up with someone. Edited January 31, 2011 by zengirl Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyDude Posted January 31, 2011 Share Posted January 31, 2011 See this is where I see a problem. If you are going on a date - you are not going for him. A date can be the beginning of a relationship. Which surprisingly both of you may be in. A date is a mutual thing. It is a nice gesture for a guy to pay but why do women see if as you are doing him a favor for going out with him? What, is he paying you for your time? Hmm,they do say prostitution is the oldest form of work, since this concept seems to be so stuck in people heads. THat's why I just have women come to my apt the first time since they have that mindset Link to post Share on other sites
BobSacamento Posted January 31, 2011 Share Posted January 31, 2011 I usually say something like "Well, this was nice and I have your number (email). Have a good night." Link to post Share on other sites
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