Women who hit a certain age and are desperate to get married

[AD1980]

I know of about 4 females in the last few months i know whos boyfriends broke up with them after about 6 months because theyre already discussing and pushing marriage

 

All these women are anywhere from late 20's to early 30's,i undertsand women have bioligical clocks and everything and theres a stigma to women who are single past a certian age but youre gonna scare guys off by trying to rush things too much

 

The guy is gonna think if you bring up marriage that early are you in live with him or just in love and desperate toget married to anyone...

[LittleTiger]

I had 3 guys want to marry me before I was 30. I said no to all of them. I eventually got married at 35.

 

Not all women are desperate to get married.

[D-Jam]

I know of about 4 females in the last few months i know whos boyfriends broke up with them after about 6 months because theyre already discussing and pushing marriage

 

All these women are anywhere from late 20's to early 30's,i undertsand women have bioligical clocks and everything and theres a stigma to women who are single past a certian age but youre gonna scare guys off by trying to rush things too much

 

The guy is gonna think if you bring up marriage that early are you in live with him or just in love and desperate toget married to anyone...

 

I think 6 months is a bit too much of a rush. I know some women who get all freaked out at the idea of dating for a few years before popping the question.

 

My heart goes out to women who want kids, but took time out of their lives to get educated and build a career, but I also know some simply ended up in their late 20s/early 30s and in this "desperation" mode because they wasted too much time on the wrong guys.

 

My only advice to these women is to make it clear early on you're looking for marriage and family, but accept that most men won't just run down the aisle after a short time.

 

My advice to the men is to not feel pressured, but if you want kids in your life, and this woman seems like a real catch, then negotiate and plan things out. Maybe she'll put off engagement for a year or put off kids for a year or two if you really like her but want to slow things down.

 

If you're not wanting to marry anytime soon, then make sure these women know...so they can move on.

[EasyHeart]

I had 3 guys want to marry me before I was 30. I said no to all of them. I eventually got married at 35.

 

Not all women are desperate to get married.

Nowhere in his post did he say "all". In fact, he said "4".

[bac]

I know of about 4 females in the last few months i know whos boyfriends broke up with them after about 6 months because theyre already discussing and pushing marriage

 

All these women are anywhere from late 20's to early 30's,i undertsand women have bioligical clocks and everything and theres a stigma to women who are single past a certian age but youre gonna scare guys off by trying to rush things too much

 

The guy is gonna think if you bring up marriage that early are you in live with him or just in love and desperate toget married to anyone...

 

 

Both genders do not want to wait too long to meet their biological needs.

Men, how long do you date before the first sex to satisfy your sexual drive?

From what I know, most of you would not wait longer than about 5-6 dates.

You also do scare girls off by trying to rush things too much.

The girl is gonna think if you bring up sex that early you are only after sex.

[LittleTiger]

Nowhere in his post did he say "all". In fact, he said "4".

 

He said 4 in the last few months.

 

The implication is there AND, if I'm not mistaken, he has mentioned this apparent desperation before in other posts.

 

Just making a point that's all.

[phineas]

The last 4 women I've met that are pushing 40 ALL want kids or another kid before they get too old.

 

I'll be 39 in a few months. They know this & keep trying to find out in a round about way if i'd like more kids. Apparently 90% of the single men out there in the 40 range are all fat slobs. Of the 10% still in shape 7% are total players. That puts me in the top 3%. Yay me.

 

I was divorced last month (but separated 1.5yrs) & I've got 2 boys a 2 & 4 yr old. This does not stop them from looking at me like a piece of horse flesh trying to determine if I got good genes. I'm surprised they havn't checked my teeth yet.

 

Yeah, my "stuff" is good for a while & i'm in decent shape. I also kinda wanted to try for a little girl with my wife, but I suspected her of cheating & was right so no way I was going to bring another child into that situation.

 

I also fear having a kid with someone who just wants a sperm donor with a job then i'm raising 3 kids from broken homes.

I get the feeling these women want to go from zero to knocked up in a yr.

[LittleTiger]

It's really strange hearing guys talk like this because I've never come across a woman who would marry just to have children - I mean it isn't even necessary. Millions of children these days are born out of wedlock or are brought up by single, never married or divorced, parents.

 

Most of the women I know in their 30s aren't even that keen to get married, especially if they don't have children. They're women who are independent and have their own homes and careers. One or two of them want a man in their life for all the obvious reasons, but marriage and children are not a priority on that wish list.

 

If people are really getting married just so that they're not left on the shelf or because they're in a hurry to start a family, then it's no wonder the divorce rate is so high.

[Crazy Magnet]

Kids are a priority for me at 30, but not marriage. Everything I need to reproduce I can order off the internet. Next time you see one of these four ladies remind them of that.

 

There will always be people with different ideas of when it's ok to bring up marriage. Based on the HUGE percentage of my friends who got engaged around the one year mark, I'd say for them 6 months wasn't too early. For men and women who want to wait several years first, then yes 6 months is a bit of a rush.

[Woggle]

This same women will be divorced in ten years. I hate to say it but women these days want the big princess day but have not the slightest clue on building a life together with a man. They want to follow their friends and have the big day but the commitment goes down after that.

[that girl]

How does even this thread turn into woman bashing?

 

I also know some simply ended up in their late 20s/early 30s and in this "desperation" mode because they wasted too much time on the wrong guys.

They can sleep around when they're young, but then when they decide it's time to get married, they think they can just pick some guy and snap their fingers, and he'll be doing backflips at joy for the chance to get married.

The thing is, the wrong guys don't necessarily wear signs. The women I know who hit their late 20s and were desperate to marry were mostly the ones who'd had a very long term relationship with a nice guy who had no interest in marrying them (or getting married at all). But they didn't admit it until marriage had been brought up numerous times after years. It makes them much more wary of the next guy.

 

I hate to say it but women these days want the big princess day but have not the slightest clue on building a life together with a man. They want to follow their friends and have the big day but the commitment goes down after that.

Honestly, I don't know one wedding obsessed girl. I know several who are really keen on marriage, but they're all really serious about finding a guy who they get along with who shares there feelings about marriage, kids, etc. I don't doubt there are wedding obsessed women out there, but if I haven't met them I can't believe they are the norm.

 

Based on the HUGE percentage of my friends who got engaged around the one year mark, I'd say for them 6 months wasn't too early.

I think married people in their twenties and early thirties are split between two groups- the ones who have been together since they were fairly young and eventually got around to marriage and the ones who were both ready when they met and got engaged at the year or year and a half mark.

 

I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to figure out if the person you are seeing sees marriage in the near future around the six month mark. Pushing for an engagement at the six month mark is crazy, but if a guy freaks out at the idea of marriage odds are he is very far from ready and the relationship won't work.

[AD1980]

This same women will be divorced in ten years. I hate to say it but women these days want the big princess day but have not the slightest clue on building a life together with a man. They want to follow their friends and have the big day but the commitment goes down after that.

 

Yeah i sometimes feel the actual act of marriage and having their day is more important to some women then the man they marry

 

Women are conditoned from a little girl that their wedding day is special and if they dont have that day theryre a failure so they sometimes get married just to get married

[AverageJoe]

I think the odds of a women getting married past the age of 35 or 40 drops by the day. Because anybody worth having can get someone younger and hotter. If they dont have kids, they are especially desperate because the potential of that last egg dropping is right around the corner.

[make me believe]

This same women will be divorced in ten years. I hate to say it but women these days want the big princess day but have not the slightest clue on building a life together with a man. They want to follow their friends and have the big day but the commitment goes down after that.

 

I totally agree. I have a friend who is completely obsessed with getting married and she's only 24! She's in a crappy relationship (she is constantly crying about her BF & saying how unhappy she is with him), but she is trying SO hard to get him to propose to her. All she cares about is getting married & having a big fancy wedding ASAP. She started considering herself "too old" to not be married when she graduated college at 22.

 

But there are actually some guys like this, too. I have a male friend who got married at 23 just because he felt like that's what he was "supposed" to do at that age. Interestingly, when I announced my engagement recently, he was the first (and only) person to make sarcastic remarks to me about marriage & what a dumb idea it was.

[Woggle]

To me marriage just caps off an already great relationship. Getting married without building an already good relationship is like building a house without a foundation.

[that girl]

I think the odds of a women getting married past the age of 35 or 40 drops by the day. Because anybody worth having can get someone younger and hotter. If they dont have kids, they are especially desperate because the potential of that last egg dropping is right around the corner.

*Eye roll* Seriously?

 

Not only are you putting a crazy expiration date on women (lots of whom get married after 35), but you're also implying that any guy reading this forum who isn't able to get a woman (nevermind a young hot woman) is worthless.

[Woggle]

I don't agree with that. There are plenty of people who get married later in life for whatever reasons.

[GooseChaser]

I'm 21 and getting into marriageable age, but I am in no hurry to get married. I know that it is a process and takes time. I am in a new relationship, and wouldn't expect a proposal for at least half a year, but more realistically in a few years, or even never (in the case that we broke up). I do want to get married someday, for sure! I do think it's exciting to think about how marriage might not be that far away for me. Five years, maybe? Sometime after I'm out of school? That's not far at all! Of course, that is all only speculation. Who knows! My life's really progressing, and it is very cool!

 

Women do fantasize about the wedding and stuff, but we do seek love as highly important as well.

[AverageJoe]

*Eye roll* Seriously?

 

Not only are you putting a crazy expiration date on women (lots of whom get married after 35), but you're also implying that any guy reading this forum who isn't able to get a woman (nevermind a young hot woman) is worthless.

 

Of course I am serious. I have no desire for a relationship or even marriage. But I can tell you this, if I were to ever change my mind it will be someone younger and hotter. I know many men that would agree with me on that. Others wont because they are a pussy or dont have the balls to even speak that out loud. In fact, most of the women I currently date ARE younger and hotter.

 

Believe this or not there are in fact men out there that are worthless that are not able to get a women. This shouldnt be news to you. There are also men that do have worth and the balance is usually in their favor.

Sure, there are women that get married after that age. Some get married to reprobates or Earl down in the accounting department who has never had a women hit on him in his life. But because that sell by date is rapidly approaching desperation (thread topic) can set in.

Then there are also those rare exceptions where a gal might land that CEO at a later age.

[LittleTiger]

Of course I am serious. I have no desire for a relationship or even marriage. But I can tell you this, if I were to ever change my mind it will be someone younger and hotter. I know many men that would agree with me on that. Others wont because they are a pussy or dont have the balls to even speak that out loud. In fact, most of the women I currently date ARE younger and hotter.

 

Believe this or not there are in fact men out there that are worthless that are not able to get a women. This shouldnt be news to you. There are also men that do have worth and the balance is usually in their favor.

Sure, there are women that get married after that age. Some get married to reprobates or Earl down in the accounting department who has never had a women hit on him in his life. But because that sell by date is rapidly approaching desperation (thread topic) can set in.

Then there are also those rare exceptions where a gal might land that CEO at a later age.

 

Some people have a very warped view of the world!

[Anela]

*edit. I'm too pissed to be posting here at the moment. Especially in light of the comments I've seen since the one that prompted me to post.

 

Those of you who overlook a woman solely because of her age (35 and over?) make me ill. Somebody worth having, wouldn't be looking for the younger and supposedly hotter girls.

Edited October 29, 2010 by Anela

[Alma Mobley]

Speaking only for myself, I was never desperate to get married -- was quite conflicted about it, actually. I ended up getting married at 36, to a very handsome man 10 years younger than I, and now we have a beautiful son. When I was 30, I never would have expected that to happen.

[phineas]

This same women will be divorced in ten years. I hate to say it but women these days want the big princess day but have not the slightest clue on building a life together with a man. They want to follow their friends and have the big day but the commitment goes down after that.

 

Been there, done that, lost the t-shirt in the divorce.

[counterman]

I always wonder why this is so... My friend who is only 20 says she is starting to feel desperate to actually end up with someone and not alone. It's doesn't really matter who she marries just as long as she is, according to her. Another one of my friends says after she graduates, she's going to look to get married.

 

I too view marriage as building a great relationship already, not a contract to keep someone from being alone. Plus, there's always divorce if things do not work out.

[mmk1]

Just another perspective, I'm dating girls in their 40s and think I've noticed something. Once a girl hits 40 and above, sorry for the generalization, IMHO the girl kinda gives up on getting married, still dates some, but cannot make room for a guy after that point because they are all set in their ways.

 

Instead of husbands, they all seem to have dogs that have become the focal point of their lives, leaving good guys out of the picture. That's my experience.