ONSs and FWBs

[Cinnamon]

I have recently ended a LTR and I am not ready for a LTR yet. So, I decided that I would try to do FWBs. It is easy to find men who are looking for FWBs.

But, it is difficult to find a kind of long-term FWBs.

Anyway, I have found guys online, then I gave it a try with sex with those guys. I invited the men to my place (not all together), had sex with them, told them that they were great at sex. They asked me if I wanted them to come some more to my place to have some fun, and, of course, I answered that it was great with me.

In reality, after they left, I felt that they were not good at sex for some random reasons such as mild performance anxiety, or they said smth unpleasant, or had other sexual performance issues which I did not like.

Because of that I did not feel like inviting those men for the second time to have sex as my FWBs. After that, most of them tried to contact me to make some more meetings for sex, but I told them that I was busy and unavailable. I did not do it intentionally, but it turned out that I used those guys for ONSs and did not want them after ONSs anymore.

 

I am curious about if any man was in such situations after ONSs?

Does it hurt their manhood? How do they feel about that?

What do they think about why a girl does not want to have sex with them more than once?

Do they feel any strong negative emotions against the girl?

[bac]

The men are probably upset

[TouchedByViolet]

You have a strange and skewed perspective on your reality and the perspective these men will have.

 

You are having sex with men you hardly know, and it is just that sex, there are no strong feelings associated. The guy is viewing you as an object for pleasure. They have no relation to be upset about. You may hurt their ego a bit because they may think they were not good enough compared to the other guys you are sleeping with, but maybe not. Most girls in FWB and ONS are all over the place when it comes to the guys they sleep with.

 

It would be different if you slept with a guy who you knew already had feelings for you but you just wanted an ONS.

[I'm Batman]

I think you should start charging for sex if you gonna go on a ONS rampage to find best pro in sex. You might collect cool $10,000 by the time you find him and then he will be too poor for you. But at least you will have $10,000 is some STD's.

 

+1

 

Is prostitution legal where she's from? All these ONS and the potential to contract an STD, how can the OP ever find a suitable husband in the future? If you have the looks and the body, why don't you try out to be a porn star? I can't take this thread seriously.

[Cinnamon]

I think you should start charging for sex if you gonna go on a ONS rampage to find best pro in sex. You might collect cool $10,000 by the time you find him and then he will be too poor for you. But at least you will have $10,000 is some STD's.

 

If I start charging for sex, I will put myself in a humiliating and dangerous position and I also give the power to a man.

As for STDs, because I do not charge for sex, I can use my power to set my own rules which are all about my safety.

[txsilkysmoothe]

It's becoming so difficult to know when to take someone seriously on this site!!!

 

The men who had sex with you don't care what you think about them. They probably don't even remember your name. They wanted to come back for more sex, not to be your friend.

[fishtaco]

Good for you. I respect a woman that is in charge of her sex life.

 

FWB's are by default extremely unstable. I'm a guy, and I'm perfectly fine with FWB's, but being a guy, and not a player, I don't have as many opportunities as a woman would. I've been in situations where I wanted more but she didn't or she wanted more but I didn't.

 

FWB's are difficult to manage if you care about the person. Because either way, someone's getting hurt. In that sense, I've heard some FWB veterans that would not associate with the person outside of sex. Basically, not FWB's because they're not even friends. They're just bed buddies.

 

Men want to have sex with you period. Of course they would come back and want seconds. Many men, including me, are capable of having sex (and have fun while at it), with any woman that we do not find completely repulsive. Yup, even if I don't find a woman attractive, I'd have sex her anyway if she's interested. Remember that old joke? Fat chicks are like scooters. They're fun to ride but you don't want your friends to find out. Why not? I'm free on a Tuesday night. Do I play video games or have sex with a chick. I vote for sex with a chick. As long as both sides are consensual and it was fun, I don't see a problem with this.

 

Different men will behave differently. Those without dating "charisma", will react badly when turned down. Not just sex, but let's say you went on a date, no sex. Then he wants a second date, you said no. Very common situation. Some men would shrug and get a date from someone else (the correct behavior), while some men would get mad and call you names. Replace the "dating" with sex, same difference. Capable men would shrug and get sex from someone else. Less capable ones would get mad.

 

It is what it is. Just don't be a hypocrite. If you have sex with a man and then say thanks but no thanks for seconds, don't get mad when a man does the same to you. And don't string a guy along for fun. If you're not going to have sex with him, don't pretend you're going to, and they cut him off the last second. Well, there's nothing to stop you from doing it, there's no behavior police to throw you in jail. But those would be crappy things to do.

 

Other than that, be safe, and have fun, don't worry about the guys. If they can't handle it, they shouldn't be playing with adults.