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Does being a somewhat loner work for or aganst you in the relationship world


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Old 22nd January 2009, 5:54 PM   #1
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Does being a somewhat loner work for or aganst you in the relationship world

I consider myself a loner. I mean here at college i have a good group of friends but when i go home for summer and such, i never go out and usally always stay to myself. I really dont mind it but does it take away from meeting people? I would like to find someone who is somewhat like what i am..has some friends but likes to keep to themself alot. But it seems if they are a loner..how will you find them or be found yourself?
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Old 22nd January 2009, 5:58 PM   #2
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I'm sure it works against you since you just meet less people with similar interests on a daily basis. My SO is a total loner, in the sense he doesn't hang out with people and hates going out of the house. He would prefer to sit on the computer, play video games, etc than socialize at a bar. But it took him until age 30 to find a woman like him! Don't worry though, you can meet her eventually, it might just take longer.
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Old 22nd January 2009, 6:04 PM   #3
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I'm sure it works against you since you just meet less people with similar interests on a daily basis. My SO is a total loner, in the sense he doesn't hang out with people and hates going out of the house. He would prefer to sit on the computer, play video games, etc than socialize at a bar. But it took him until age 30 to find a woman like him! Don't worry though, you can meet her eventually, it might just take longer.

Do you think it might be becasue my dad is like one? I have always been close with him and he hates people and leaving the house.
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Old 22nd January 2009, 6:41 PM   #4
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id say u shouldnt worry... perhaps u dont meet so many people and perhaps u wont be in so many relationships... but that also means that there are probably less failed relationships. I'm a loner myself and my bf is to a specific extent as well. don't worry im sure ull find someone
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Old 22nd January 2009, 8:45 PM   #5
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OP, this summer, why don't you (assuming you live in the U.S.) take a month, go to Europe and get a rail pass and tour the country and stay at hostels or homestays (cheap). Don't try to meet anyone; just wander. IME, traveling forces one to get outside themselves; just the act takes you outside yourself, even if you don't wish to interact with anyone.

I remember, in 2006, flying to Melbourne, Australia and staying there exactly 24 hours. Had enough time to walk along the Yarra River and take in a pub or two in Southbank. My wife and I were back there 3 times in 2007 and made some fabulous friends, some of whom have stayed with us here in Cali when they visited. I didn't set out to meet anyone, but things happen

I've been a loner my whole life. Work at home, live miles from civilization, didn't get married until I was 41, do everything alone and am an only child. I know the routine well.

I recall in a past thread of yours suggesting that we go on a mileage run sometime, and you laughed. Yeah, I used to laugh too. Now I just smile, and people want to be around me. It's called being content within yourself. Hope it works out for you
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Old 22nd January 2009, 9:58 PM   #6
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OP, this summer, why don't you (assuming you live in the U.S.) take a month, go to Europe and get a rail pass and tour the country and stay at hostels or homestays (cheap). Don't try to meet anyone; just wander. IME, traveling forces one to get outside themselves; just the act takes you outside yourself, even if you don't wish to interact with anyone.
This is such a great idea. Backpacking through Europe really changed me in so many positive ways.
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