Isolde Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 Sometimes, I just get so filled with anxiety about love, dating, and relationships that it makes me almost sick. Is anyone else the same way? I'm reasonably optimistic about everything else in life, so I don't understand why I'm feeling this way. I guess maybe because no one I was attracted to ever wanted to date me seriously. That's a threshold I feel I'll simply never cross, and if I did, it would be way too good to be true. I have these awful fears of settling for someone I'm not attracted to simply because I'm so starved for sex and affection and protection. I just don't feel desirable, at all, right now. The only guy who even asked me for a third date was someone I felt zero attraction to at all. I know there is someone out there, but I may never meet them. I have felt potential, that's the crazy awful thing, that potential teased me like you would tease a cat with a piece of yarn. I think I need to take a break from LS for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
Gremio Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 I know the feeling, but never settle. It isn't fair to you our your partner. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 8, 2008 Author Share Posted December 8, 2008 I know the feeling, but never settle. It isn't fair to you our your partner. Don't worry. I'd rather have an imaginary BF than settle. Link to post Share on other sites
prettybaby Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 lol I do think LS can mess you up in the head sometimes though So many strong opinions on here which people seem soooo sure about. That being said, I do understand the feeling. I think we all feel that way once in a while. Luckily, it never lasts Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 Honestly if you ever decide to go out and have fun without having thoughts about who you feel attracted to, that would lessen your anxiety. Link to post Share on other sites
zhsoj Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 Yes... In fact I've been thinking about posting a thread on how I think LS is unhealthy for me... But that would just draw me back even more... I used to be a content loner... Coming to LS everyday just reminds me that being a loner has disadvantages... Even worse it reminds me why I'm a loner... Oh well... This is why we have alcohol & the WWW Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 8, 2008 Author Share Posted December 8, 2008 Honestly if you ever decide to go out and have fun without having thoughts about who you feel attracted to, that would lessen your anxiety. I meet attractive guys when I go out, so how does that help Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 I meet attractive guys when I go out, so how does that help haha now that is a dilemma... wear a chastity ring and say you're devoted to God? what would you think their reaction be? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 8, 2008 Author Share Posted December 8, 2008 I'm just terrified of meeting the guy who is perfect in every way and not being attracted to him (not necessarily because he's ugly, just not being attracted)... Link to post Share on other sites
Nemo Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 Sometimes, I just get so filled This might be the time to take a ride on top. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 8, 2008 Author Share Posted December 8, 2008 this might be the time to take a ride on top. no, i like it that way Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 confidence is key, make eye contact, smile, don't kiss on the first date, don't be too needy, let him chase, brush your teeth, comb your hair, don't be too nice, see a counsellor, wear matching socks, strut your peacock colours, don't call too often, don't use email, don't be pushy, go for what you want, wear exciting clothes, make small talk, be yourself, keep it casual, never settle, have fun, filter out incompatible people, avoid the friend zone, follow your heart, call after 3 days, don't play games, assess the chemistry, grow your social circle organically, be a challenge, grow into love, don't be exclusive, never say i love you first, keep calm during the pullback stage, and above all don't follow the rules and do what you want, and you'll be fine. That's the LS advice, so what's to be anxious about? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 8, 2008 Author Share Posted December 8, 2008 confidence is key, make eye contact, smile, don't kiss on the first date, don't be too needy, let him chase, brush your teeth, comb your hair, don't be too nice, see a counsellor, wear matching socks, strut your peacock colours, don't call too often, don't use email, don't be pushy, go for what you want, wear exciting clothes, make small talk, be yourself, keep it casual, never settle, have fun, filter out incompatible people, avoid the friend zone, follow your heart, call after 3 days, don't play games, assess the chemistry, grow your social circle organically, be a challenge, grow into love, don't be exclusive, never say i love you first, keep calm during the pullback stage, and above all don't follow the rules and do what you want, and you'll be fine. That's the LS advice, so what's to be anxious about? :lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
Nemo Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 confidence is key, make eye contact, smile, don't kiss on the first date, don't be too needy, let him chase, brush your teeth, comb your hair, don't be too nice, see a counsellor, wear matching socks, strut your peacock colours, don't call too often, don't use email, don't be pushy, go for what you want, wear exciting clothes, make small talk, be yourself, keep it casual, never settle, have fun, filter out incompatible people, avoid the friend zone, follow your heart, call after 3 days, don't play games, assess the chemistry, grow your social circle organically, be a challenge, grow into love, don't be exclusive, never say i love you first, keep calm during the pullback stage, and above all don't follow the rules and do what you want, and you'll be fine. That's the LS advice, so what's to be anxious about? Hahahahaha. Very, very good. I think I need to take a break from LS for a while. Well, CP made some great points, but I think it's more about you taking a break from your recursive, obsessive thoughts. Chillax for a day or three, and try not to take life so seriously. For a week, say. Start small. I don't think LS is the problem, but whatever gets you through. Link to post Share on other sites
CandyGirlXO Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 I know how you feel, and even though I love LS, I think it is doing me more harm than good sometimes. I am not sure. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 9, 2008 Author Share Posted December 9, 2008 Hahahahaha. Very, very good. Well, CP made some great points, but I think it's more about you taking a break from your recursive, obsessive thoughts. Chillax for a day or three, and try not to take life so seriously. For a week, say. Start small. I don't think LS is the problem, but whatever gets you through. You're right, Nemo, I do take things a bit seriously. I'm just upset that not feeling desirable has such a profound impact on my overall mood. It shouldn't be that way! Link to post Share on other sites
Nemo Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 I know how you feel, and even though I love LS, I think it is doing me I know what you mean. LS has a way of creeping up on you from behind and inserting itself when you least expect it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 9, 2008 Author Share Posted December 9, 2008 I know what you mean. LS has a way of creeping up on you from behind and inserting itself when you least expect it. Nemo, are you a person or an inneundo generator bot? Link to post Share on other sites
Nemo Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 Nemo, are you a person or an inneundo generator bot? That sentence can not be processed. Please try again. Link to post Share on other sites
shadowplay Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 I guess maybe because no one I was attracted to ever wanted to date me seriously. Ditto. ............ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 9, 2008 Author Share Posted December 9, 2008 Ditto. ............ Time to whip out the imaginary boyfriends! Link to post Share on other sites
CandyGirlXO Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 I know what you mean. LS has a way of creeping up on you from behind and inserting itself when you least expect it. LOL! Thanks for the laugh. Link to post Share on other sites
orangehose Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 confidence is key, make eye contact, smile, don't kiss on the first date, don't be too needy, let him chase, brush your teeth, comb your hair, don't be too nice, see a counsellor, wear matching socks, strut your peacock colours, don't call too often, don't use email, don't be pushy, go for what you want, wear exciting clothes, make small talk, be yourself, keep it casual, never settle, have fun, filter out incompatible people, avoid the friend zone, follow your heart, call after 3 days, don't play games, assess the chemistry, grow your social circle organically, be a challenge, grow into love, don't be exclusive, never say i love you first, keep calm during the pullback stage, and above all don't follow the rules and do what you want, and you'll be fine. That's the LS advice, so what's to be anxious about? Brilliant. I'm going to print this out and post it above my desk Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted December 9, 2008 Author Share Posted December 9, 2008 Brilliant. I'm going to print this out and post it above my desk And then they say "Be yourself!" LOL. Link to post Share on other sites
orangehose Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 I'm just upset that not feeling desirable has such a profound impact on my overall mood. It shouldn't be that way! Ideally, yeah, it shouldn't, but it can be hard to just 'not care' when it seems like everyone around you has had relationship experience. I didn't have my first boyfriend until I was 23, and I did feel frustrated and wonder what was wrong with me in my late teens / early twenties. I assumed I must be loathsome to men, and that further exacerbated any shyness I must have projected. Good news is, one day you WILL have a relationship, and then *pouf*... all this will be a thing of the past. You'll have a new array of issues to face... Link to post Share on other sites
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