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Is Friendship Learned or Instinctive?


swedeace

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I recently began wondering this burning question. I guess I am looking for answers through a sociological-interactive perspective:

 

Is friendship something humans learn how to handle/maintain? Or, is friendship just an innate instinctive quality we possess?

 

I used to think it was just instinctive, but then I came across a certain situation that leads me to believe otherwise. Before I discuss those theories, I'd like some others' opinions. Thanks to all who reply. :)

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Both. We're social creatures.

 

Friendships are like any other relationship. You learn over time how to maintain it, if you want to keep it.

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Originally posted by 7on

Instinctive. Autistics don't count because their instincts are... off.

Oh yeah. Shouldn't forget the autistics.

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Thank you all for your opinions!

 

Hmm… it’s always been a touchy area, in my opinion. For instance, I have observed those individuals who seem to be socially-adaptive seem to not care about losing friendships. And those who are not as socially-adaptive seem to really hang on or let others determine if they want to drag out a friendship. Would that be because of those socially-adaptive people have higher self-esteem than those who aren’t? I’ve had that happen with befriending someone who doesn’t have very many friends. We are both in the same boat as far as being non-socially adaptive. We don’t have a lot of experience, but I guess we are both testing waters in our friendship. We are learning how to socialize and maintain our friendship through each other.

 

We have both come across arguments, disagreements and conflicts and still manage to maintain contact. We have met in person but now exclusively communicate online. How would that friendship weather via online? Is it still the same as being “offline” friends?

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Instinctive

 

Have you ever noticed little children together.

 

Their minds are so pure and have not be tainted by society and growing up to learn to hate yet.

 

When I was married and I would go to the playground with my step-daughter.. I'm thinking about the time she was 5 .. She would make friends with all the kids there instantly.These were traits she already had and nobody taught her

 

The older our children get their childrens minds get polluted with fat,ugly,black,white,skinny,rich,poor,

good,bad,nasty, etc etc... that they start to learn to seperate their friends into those catagories that are acceptable in their social circle.

 

Then they start only be friends with certain types and then their friendship has become more of a learned state

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