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-   -   Am I in the wrong to think about me and my girlfriend over an acquaintance's wedding? (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/friendship/636452-am-i-wrong-think-about-me-my-girlfriend-over-acquaintance-s-wedding)

CoolJoe 2nd October 2017 12:02 AM

Am I in the wrong to think about me and my girlfriend over an acquaintance's wedding?
 
I was recently invited to an old acquaintance's wedding. Truth be told, I was never close with him, and have barely spoken with him in the last 6 years. The invite didn't come out of nowhere as we used to be a church small group together, but it felt like a bit of a stretch. I appreciated his thinking of me but if I got married tomorrow, he probably wouldn't get an invite. Not because I dislike him or anything but just that we haven't stayed in touch much (or at all, almost) over the past 6 years.

Anyway, instead of going to the wedding with my GF and paying the $100 or so, I decided to do what I felt would be best for me and my GF. I am a people pleaser through and through but this time I decided to put down my foot and think about me and my GF. Instead of paying $100 to my old acquaintance and attending a wedding I really didn't care to be at, I decided to invest the $100 into a fun-filled extravagant date night with an activity my GF has expressed fond interest in trying. We'll basically be going out on a fancy date.

Part of me feels guilty for choosing fancy date with my GF versus attending this wedding and blessing my old acquaintance with $100 but I also want to be honest with myself and do what's in my best interest. I'm tired of trying to please everyone all the time and when I wrote to him that sorry I couldn't make it, it was like a sigh of relief... I finally said no and did what I feel is best for me (and my relationship with my GF).

Still, posting to see what people think. Was I in the right or wrong for doing what I did? I feel pretty good overall, but it never hurts to seek a second opinion.

basil67 2nd October 2017 12:23 AM

Given that you barely know him anymore, you did the right thing.

Poptree 4th October 2017 6:02 PM

I don't think you did anything wrong. People can't attend weddings because of all types of reasons. You're building a life with your gf not this distant friend. Also the only way that you could be in the wrong is if you already rsvp'd to go and then canceled but it doesn't seem like that is the case.

d0nnivain 4th October 2017 6:35 PM

Just because you were invited, doesn't mean you have to go. Conventional wisdom does indicate that the polite thing to do would be to send a small gift & card anyway.

iVisa 7th October 2017 3:39 PM

I totally understand you. Send a card and go out with your girlfriend.


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