LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Platonic > Friendship

Nearly 12 months later


Friendship Having issues with a friend? Get it off your chest!

Old 20th July 2017, 5:47 AM   #1
New Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 2
Angry Nearly 12 months later

I had this real close friend. We done everything together and was with each other every minute of the day. 12months ago we had a massive argument and since then he won't talk or even acknowledge me.

I realise he was a narcissist, I had to buy everything and he never had any money, I didn't mind doing it at the time as I felt so sorry for him. He is a drug addict and alcoholic.

Problem is I still really miss this person.

We live in the same building. In this building they have bingo on saturday night and bbq on sunday night. I am frightened to go to any events with the fear that he may be there.

I don't know if this is making since. I think I had feelings for him that could not be reciprocated. How do I continue to live without him. I am even scared to leave my room incase I bump into him. The not saying anything really kills me.

Any ideas? I should be over this by now surely
hugbear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th July 2017, 6:47 AM   #2
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Antipodes
Posts: 7,087
What exactly do you miss about him? And what was the argument over?
basil67 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th July 2017, 6:51 AM   #3
New Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 2
I miss his friendship and having someone to talk to.

The argument was because I did not stick up for him when a girl who he is still seeing was running him down. Because I didn't stick up for him I lose the friendship but the girl gets him
hugbear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th July 2017, 8:55 AM   #4
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,053
Quote:
Originally Posted by hugbear View Post

I realise he was a narcissist, I had to buy everything and he never had any money, I didn't mind doing it at the time as I felt so sorry for him. He is a drug addict and alcoholic.
For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing in pulling back from the situation. The only person that can really help him is himself; nothing you can give him or take from him will ever be enough. You can care about someone who is mired in addiction, and miss the person that they used to be, but being a financial or emotional caregiver to a long term addict is an unhealthy and untenable situation to place yourself in.

I'd suggest contacting Al-anon or a similar support group for loved ones and friends of addicts - you will get far more insight into your own feelings.
O'Malley is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th July 2017, 3:01 PM   #5
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 17,447
One thing you must never waste your time doing is trying to reason with or make sense of any type of addict. Their Number 1 priority is getting high.

How do you know he isn't skipping these building functions too? Maybe you could go because he is maybe not going to them for the same reason you aren't.
Also, you could maybe make some new friends at the activities. At least you should be going somewhere and doing something active and social to meet new friends.
__________________
"I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not better for it." -- Abraham Lincoln
preraph is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
6 months BU,ex follows me around in parties! Broke my 3 months NC and fell on trap Nuna Breaks and Breaking Up 2 29th June 2013 8:05 AM
3 Months Since Breakup, 2 Months NC - Seeing Each Other All The Time, Closure? UJK90 Breaks and Breaking Up 9 18th December 2012 1:04 PM
3 year relationship, 3.5 months NC, 1.5 months LC, need to move on for good havoc87 Coping 1 2nd December 2012 10:54 PM
after 7 months of relation n 2 months of no contact feels hopeless !!!!!!!!!! nishthac Breaks and Breaking Up 3 31st August 2011 12:14 PM
my girlfried of 18 months cheated 2 months ago. should i stay or should i go? yfulmer Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy 17 11th August 2004 10:39 PM

 

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 9:24 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2013 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.