Problem communicating with others

[cbfan]

I've been with my boyfriend for a year and I'm happy with him but... I don't have friends. I do but I haven't hung out with any for a while. I have been invited to places from others but I would turn it down because either I don't feel like going anywhere, they're not the best people to be around (bad influences), and I'd rather hang out with my boyfriend 99% of the time; otherwise I would gladly stay home to do my daily workouts, paint, bake, cook, binge on Netflix etc.. All sounds good and dandy but I do miss the feeling of having girlfriends to have drinks with, hang out at the mall, have brunch, Pokemon hunting, etc.. Don't get me wrong! I love being with my boyfriend and he's such a fun person to be with hence why I always prefer him more than anyone else! He's my best friend as well and I'm so much more comfortable being around him, and because I trust him.

 

Anyway, I don't have much of a problem communicating with others but I guess just keeping a conversation going sometimes makes me stop, for the most part it gets awkward having the basic questions such as "what are you studying?", "what school do you go to?", "how's it going?" keeps me talking for a while but then I wouldn't know what else to say, then an awkward silence comes across and then I'll just say that it's time for me to leave. The thing is I'm really good at initiating invites but then I don't go through with it because of what I mentioned in the first paragraph.

 

Also what really makes me stop talking to new friends is when 99.9% of them are guys and 100% of the time, all they wanna do is get in my pants. I mean ****! I just wanna have friends, why does this ALWAYS HAVE TO HAPPEN?! Literally I don't dress appealing AT ALL, no makeup or anything but for some reason all guys that come up to me wants to be "friendly" with me. I don't flirt at all and I let them know I have a boyfriend. Of course I don't tell them right off the spot but for the most part that topic comes up anyway, it's either they continue to harass me or they completely stop talking to me once I tell them I have a boyfriend. I mean people who act that way I don't care for, sucks at times because I've met really great people but if that's their motive then they're out for me, my relationship means a lot more to me.

 

As for women, it's really hard for me to relate to them at times. I really only have one best girlfriend but she lives 500 miles away so I don't see her often, we talk almost everyday but that's about it. But as far as that goes it's usually men that come up to talk to me, and I can talk to men better than women. I really wanna change that!

 

Sorry for this rant I'm just trying to make you guys understand my frustration. I really wanna start having close friends who live around my area. I was so fixated on my two best friends (guy and girl) one living 500 miles away and the other living in another time zone across the country; I just kinda gave up trying to make friends. Before being with my boyfriend I always had that problem, never really ventured out and pursued other people, but only my two best friends. Also, besides my two best friends, for some reason I always attract bad influences. At times I tolerate it because they're my friends and don't want to be left out.. but I honestly don't like being around those type of people, and it frustrates me that I somehow always attract those types, men and/or women. Every time I make a new friend they're always trying to get in my pants and/or a bad influence.

 

I guess I need help making friends again. But friends who can inspire me to be successful and useful in the future. Friends who want to see me succeed and be happy. Anyway, that's all the venting , Thanks for reading ::

[preraph]

If you want to keep female friends, then you can't abandon them just because you have a boyfriend. No one thinks that is okay. You surely have enough personality resources and time to maintain more than one person in your life. As for the other guys, don't waste time with them when you're in a relationship. it will only weaken it and they don't want to just be friends. So free up that time and use it treating your girlfriends better or making new ones you don't put on the back burner.