How do I solve this?

[ZA Dater]

Boutique clothing store, one young sales lady.

 

 

Friend: "ZA Dater, buy some clothes, you want a girlfriend don't you"

 

 

Afterwards "she is cute, if I were single I'd definitely want to abc with her"

 

 

Second clothing store

 

 

Friend "Cmon buy something, chicks dig designer clothes"

 

 

Am I being over sensitive when I say all of these things make me feel really uncomfortable?

 

 

I have told him I don't like him doing this, its happened before.

 

 

On a trip he says to the guy travelling with us, someone I didn't know well (said it quietly but I did hear).

 

 

"Shame he is desperate to find a gf"

 

 

Then it happened on another occasion with reference to a strip club.

 

 

When he does this I feel worse than ****, maybe I am over sensitive and should try laugh about it?

 

 

When he says this I am just reminded of each and every rejection and that at 31 I haven't kissed anyone.

 

 

Opinions and thoughts?

[La.Primavera]

The only way I think you can solve this is to dump your friend. He sounds absolutely toxic. Not only is he poisoning your opinion of yourself but he is also influencing how other people view you as well.

 

You have mentioned the same "friend" behaving like this before so this is clearly a pattern that will continue as long as you let it. That is a huge problem that could have negative consequences if you were ever to introduce him to a new girlfriend. Can you imagine the insulting things or sly comments he would make? I can, and I don't even know him.

 

I can't see the benefit in maintaining a friendship like this.

[ZA Dater]

The only way I think you can solve this is to dump your friend. He sounds absolutely toxic. Not only is he poisoning your opinion of yourself but he is also influencing how other people view you as well.

 

You have mentioned the same "friend" behaving like this before so this is clearly a pattern that will continue as long as you let it. That is a huge problem that could have negative consequences if you were ever to introduce him to a new girlfriend. Can you imagine the insulting things or sly comments he would make? I can, and I don't even know him.

 

I can't see the benefit in maintaining a friendship like this.

 

 

Sage advice. I think he think its funny and maybe he is trying to get me to try and chat up that random female. I am simply extremely uncomfortable at doing that, especially when I can see its someone way out of my league.

 

 

Every time he does this my self confidence of which I don't have a lot to start drops even further and I just feel so bad about myself.

 

 

Am going to talk to him about this again. Actually I am simply going to tell him my dating abilities are off topic and wont be discussed going forward.