DenverDude Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 I am going to try and make this as short as possible. All week my good friend and I had plans to go to the football game and tailgate and look to buy some tickets from scalpers. If we couldn't find tickets, the plan was to go watch the game at local bar. Yesterday morning (day of game) I texted him asking if we were still on. He called me, and mentioned that he wasn't too sure if he wanted to go - as he was up all night coughing. I said no worries, let's just watch it at one of our places. He seemed on board. He mentioned to give him a call a few hours before the game to finalize our plans. Well, I did just that, and he didn't answer. I then texted him asking him what his plans were, and again, nothing back... About an hour before the game I sent him one more text asking him if he was ok and that the game would be starting soon so I needed to know what the plans were. He finally texted me back after the last message and said that he was throwing up and thought that he had a bad case of the stomach flu.. I didn't think anything of it, and wished him well. Now, my other good friend knew I was supposed to be going to the game with my friend who came down with the stomach flu. He was hosting a party at his and his girlfriends house, and because he knew I was going to the game, and his girlfriend is friends with my ex girlfriend, he told me that she would be coming over. When he found out that my frined had to cancel our plans of going to the game, he felt really bad that I would essentially by watching it alone. I told him not to worry about it, and stuff like that happens. Fast forward to the end of the game. I get a text from my friend who was hosting the party. He said "I wanted to tell you this after the game, so it didn't ruin your afternoon.. Your ex girlfriend invited 'x' (my friend who I thought had the flu) to my party. I had no idea he was coming as you had told me he was sick. I just assumed it was someone else". He was genuinely pissed off that my friend had the balls to lie to me and he wanted to tell me before my friend tried to cover his tracks. Apparently, when my friend realized he was meeting up with my ex, at a house with a bunch of people who are really close friends with me, his face got really pale. Almost as he knew that he was "busted" in a lie to me. I'm not mad that he showed up to the party with her - as they are strictly friends and thats it. I am extremely hurt that he flat out lied to me after we had plans set all week. He tried calling me 2 times last night and I didn't answer. I know he was calling me because he knew I knew that he lied to me. The reason I am posting this is because I dont know what to do. I know earlier in the month he told me that he felt bad for being inbetween me and my ex, and at the time I told him it was no biggy. I told him he can be friends with whoever he wants, and he reiterated to me several times that he was my "bro" and he "loves me like a brother".. I am really bothered because we have plans to go to a concert on Friday and a boxing match later this month. I don't even know what to say to him or if I even want to talk to him again. What would you guys do if you were in my shoes? Sorry for the rant. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Dump him. You don't need friends like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Dontfindme Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Sorry if I'm stating what's obvious - but I have a feeling your "friend" is probably crushing on your ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Author DenverDude Posted January 12, 2015 Author Share Posted January 12, 2015 I really dont think he is crushing on her, nor she is crushing on him. He actually just started seeing someone else. But now that I know he is a liar, I have no idea. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 What an awkward situation. Very hurtful to be lied to like that. Going out with your ex, how could he think it wouldn't get back to you about that game day? It's a small world. I'd hear him out, but if he tries to cover his lies with even one more lie, I'd tell him to piss off. If he confesses all and apologizes, I'd tell him you don't give a rat's ass who he was with but that he shouldn't make plans if he doesn't intend to keep them. Now, if you feel he's disposable, then by all means take someone else to those events and blow him off. But if you feel he's a valuable friend you'll still care about 5 years from now, you'll have to forgive. I also think he's got a thing for your ex to blow you off for her. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 I'm not mad that he showed up to the party with her - as they are strictly friends and thats it. I am extremely hurt that he flat out lied to me after we had plans set all week. Denver, they are a couple. Hate to burst your bubble on that but they are together. No way would he blow off the plans with you if they were just friends. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 I really dont think he is crushing on her, nor she is crushing on him. He actually just started seeing someone else. But now that I know he is a liar, I have no idea. You don't know for sure. Fact is, he's close with your ex girlfriend. And unfortunately he chose her over you. He made up a story (bad karma to use sickness and lie about it - This will come back and bite him soon enough, he'll probably get sick for real soon) and lied to you throughout the day instead of just being honest. I'd be curious as to why he'd do that, so do talk to him once you've calmed down. Don't allow him to justify it nor downplay it. He had a better offer by your ex (possibly his new interest) he could have just told you, but he didn't. Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 (edited) I'd be pissed. Not because he's hanging out with your ex, but because he ditched you when you had plans to go to a football game together and didn't own up to it. It depends on how far you two go back, but I don't think I could be friends with someone after that. It'd be different if it was supposed to be a group thing and he chose to do something with your ex and another group, but to bail on you solo is messed up. You can't count on that guy for anything if he's going to ditch you without even the cojones to tell you why. Edited January 13, 2015 by rester Link to post Share on other sites
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