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Would it be weird to message a friend that you haven't spoken to in 10 years?


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Old 24th November 2014, 12:43 AM   #1
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Would it be weird to message a friend that you haven't spoken to in 10 years?

I had a friend from middle school, and she was just the sweetest person. Everyone loved her. I was very quiet back then, and so I didn't have many friends, but she was always so nice to me. We weren't best friends or anything, but we had a few classes together, and we always talked in those classes. She always invited me to her birthday parties and things like that, so yeah I guess we were pretty good friends. I feel like we could've had a close friendship, but I was so quiet that forming close friendships was nearly impossible for me back then haha.

I do have her as a friend on facebook, and her stuff always shows up on my newsfeed. I always remember what an extremely kind and nice person she was, and it seems like she hasn't changed at all. I'd really like to be friends with her again, but we haven't spoken at all since middle school. We were 13 then, and now we're 23. It's been 10 years which is a very long time. Plus, we live on opposite ends of the country now.

Would it be weird to randomly message her and ask how she is doing? I don't even know if she remembers me. I feel like the whole thing would be rather awkward just because of how long it's been. Should I do it anyway?
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Old 24th November 2014, 12:50 AM   #2
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I think it's sweet, I've received messages from old friends, and it was always a pleasant surprise.

The only thing to keep in mind is for you to not have too many expectations about the friendship - don't expect to start talking to her everyday, or even just past that initial exchange. Regardless of how nice she is, she has changed in the 10 years, and she probably won't become your close friend right away. Everything takes time to develop, and sometimes, it may not. You may also have to lead the friendship a bit, if you're looking for a more lasting friendship from her. Which should still be okay, I think.

And if it doesn't work out, that should be okay too. Some people just don't fit that well in our current lives, doesn't mean we can't be friendly, make an attempt, and leave the doors open for the future.
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Old 24th November 2014, 1:15 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by disneyfan90 View Post
I had a friend from middle school, and she was just the sweetest person. Everyone loved her. I was very quiet back then, and so I didn't have many friends, but she was always so nice to me. We weren't best friends or anything, but we had a few classes together, and we always talked in those classes. She always invited me to her birthday parties and things like that, so yeah I guess we were pretty good friends. I feel like we could've had a close friendship, but I was so quiet that forming close friendships was nearly impossible for me back then haha.

I do have her as a friend on facebook, and her stuff always shows up on my newsfeed. I always remember what an extremely kind and nice person she was, and it seems like she hasn't changed at all. I'd really like to be friends with her again, but we haven't spoken at all since middle school. We were 13 then, and now we're 23. It's been 10 years which is a very long time. Plus, we live on opposite ends of the country now.

Would it be weird to randomly message her and ask how she is doing? I don't even know if she remembers me. I feel like the whole thing would be rather awkward just because of how long it's been. Should I do it anyway?
You two are on each others facebook, so obviously she remembers you.

So, why not reach out and tell her that you have fond memories and just ask her about her life and then casually say if she ever is traveling back to where you are, to look you up so you two can get together. Go for it.
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Old 24th November 2014, 10:19 AM   #4
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That's the whole point of FB to put you back in touch with old friends.

Message away!
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Old 25th November 2014, 5:43 PM   #5
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It's been a long time- a decade. Why bother now?
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Old 25th November 2014, 5:54 PM   #6
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In the past two years I've reconnected with three friends that I haven't heard from or spoken to in over 12 years. It's been well worth it.

I'd message her but keep your expectations for a response low.
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Old 27th November 2014, 9:46 AM   #7
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Message and say hello!

Blimey... Its been 20 years for some of my friends and I but every now and then we message/ phone/ write etc.

Length of time actually means nothing. Just get in touch.
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