Summershirt Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Ok I need some advice I met a girl (two years ago) but we have just been friends until quite recently when we admitted we like each other. She got jealous when I had told her I had dated another girl, her response was “oh” She admitted she didn't like it. But nothing came of my date. It was after that moment when I suggested we go out. She said yes but she cancelled (Never really gave a reason) She didn’t get in touch for a couple of weeks or respond to my texts but when I saw her next, she told me she had been placed on anti-depressants by her doctor, she cried and I offered her a hug, she held me tight for quite a while. We talked about depression because I have suffered from it (on and off) for a few years now. We re-arranged our date, she suggested a day and talked about it quite a bit, I text her a day or so before to see if we were still on, she said she was looking forward to it. Then really early in the morning (on the day) I had a text from her, she said she wasn't well and had to cancel. I have not heard from her since. I am sure her depression is the cause of her cancelling twice which I completely understand. I have text her and called to show her my support but I haven’t heard back from her. I am not sure what to do? Shall I leave her and give her some space or tell her I am happy not to date at the moment or what? I am worrying too much about the situation as I have been in the same boat and I had 0 friends to turn too at the time and I almost took my own life. Maybe I am worrying too much and I should just relax and give it time? Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 One idea sprang straight to mind. A really neat male friend of mine came to visit me one day when I was really depressed and he suggested we both make vision boards for ourselves, so we got cardboard and magazines and spent a whole afternoon cutting and pasting pictures of how we would like to see our futures, mine was full of tranquil places, piles of gold:laugh: ,couples looking lovingly at each other, guitar playing and happy children. It certainly made me feel better. Maybe you could do this with her too. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 She could even be having physical side effects making her feel bad until she acclimates to the new meds. I would just text her and tell her you'll talk to her later in the week and see how she's feeling and then if she feels up to texting/talking, she can initiate that in the meantime. Just needs some time/space. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 One idea sprang straight to mind. A really neat male friend of mine came to visit me one day when I was really depressed and he suggested we both make vision boards for ourselves, so we got cardboard and magazines and spent a whole afternoon cutting and pasting pictures of how we would like to see our futures, mine was full of tranquil places, piles of gold:laugh: ,couples looking lovingly at each other, guitar playing and happy children. It certainly made me feel better. Maybe you could do this with her too. this is a really cool idea very positive....deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Summershirt Posted July 17, 2014 Author Share Posted July 17, 2014 Its all gone wrong, I have not been quite honest... After she cancelled I called her on my work phone to see if she answered, I don't know why I did it, I guess I was just worried as she cancelled early in the morning and did not reply all day. She found out it was me (Not sure how) and now is not talking to me, I borrowed a mates phone and called her, she realised it was me and said "F*** sake" and hung up! I don't know what to do now! Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 Well, number one, stop calling. She'll either get over it or she won't. Caller ID. It's her move now. She'll either recontact you or she won't. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Summershirt Posted July 31, 2014 Author Share Posted July 31, 2014 Well....I went to her house last week with some flowers, she kicked off when I turned up but we had a chat, a said I was sorry and I tried to explain myself, she was ok after that, she kissed me a couple of times and we arranged to go out this weekend. She said my behaviour was like her ex- who became obsessive and began stalking her and in the end tried to hurt her, so she wasn't sure about me. But I text today and have had no reply. So maybe she just cannot deal with me. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 sounds like she has some problems and maybe a bit of fear because of her ex..she needs space let her contact you...she isnt telling you how she really feels and i dotn think she is ready to date by the way she makes dates and doesnt keep them......plenty of space for this woman ... send a text message saying you are there if she needs you(if you want to be there) and then say you know my number give me a call when you are up to it...dont contact her again after that.....so its closure for you and for her.....unless she contacts you again....you dont deserve to be stood up and she shouldnt feel trapped.....that is what stalking does ...makes you hide out and feel trapped... so dont harass her ...send that last text.... let it go..........deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author Summershirt Posted July 31, 2014 Author Share Posted July 31, 2014 You really think that is what I should do? We are supposed to be going out this weekend.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 You really think that is what I should do? We are supposed to be going out this weekend.... I would make a guess to say it wont eventuate......when it doesnt send the text..... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Summershirt Posted July 31, 2014 Author Share Posted July 31, 2014 I am sure she wants to go out... after we chatted she kept asking "where do we go from here?" I told her what I wanted and asked her if she was free in the evening, she said she only was for an hour so I asked about this weekend and we agreed. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Summershirt Posted August 2, 2014 Author Share Posted August 2, 2014 Well....what a ****ing surprise ! I text her in the week, no reply, I text her today, no reply, I went to her's anyway (straight from work, just to see what she was saying) and her car was there but no answer. What a ****ing twisted evil cow, not even a text to cancel our date. I wrote her a note and posted it through her door. I don't give a **** anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
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