I unintentionally hurt a friend now she is on a tirade.

[Egychick]

I unintentionally hurt my close friend by neglecting to invite her to a prayer and worship group meeting. This is at a time where the situation in the country I am living in isn't good. I felt very very bad, and I have said sorry and have even prayed about it, I have asked for her forgiveness. I have even invited her to another prayer event at my place tonight. But since that time I hurt her, she has insulted me, called me stupid, arrogant, self-centered, immature, and ego driven. I have tried to make peace with her. But no matter what I do, she insults me. And says, she doesn't want to be friends with me, not even acquaintances. I understand her, I know she has the right to be angry. But to insult me, over a mistake that I made, unintentionally, I don't think is warranted to this degree. But then again, everyone acts differently. I have no problem with her, I even said I still consider her a friend. First she said, she forgave me, then she took it back and said she can't forgive me. She has deleted me from Facebook before, because she didn't like my friends (she later added me...then she just deleted me again after this mistake.) I have an older friend, who she felt uncomfortable around, so she said she didn't want to be around him, therefore she wouldn't be comfortable being in a place where he was. So, I didn't invite her. I told her, to give him a chance, and get to know him...and he is a nice man. Later, she realized it, and wanted to hang out again, I always asked her to join us after that. She says I exclude her...am I really to blame if she has sent emails and texts saying she doesn't want to be around my friends and she doesn't like my friends?! She also accuses me of things that aren't true. I know I don't call her every day, she calls more. But we hang out a lot. I have been there for her in key times. I am with her almost more than anyone else I know. I never insulted her, I accepted her for who she is...she snaps gets angry quickly, but I just let it go.

 

She also has this problem with many people. She has snapped and cut off so many people in her life. Someone makes a mistake, and boom, it's over! She tells me that I care about numbers. This isn't true. I know a lot of people...but the people who I consider close friends...is very few. She pushes everyone away. She can snap out in public, even embarrassing herself. I know she has gone through a lot in her life, and these bad past experiences are affecting her. I feel bad for the mistake I've made with her, cause I'm not sure If I am to blame for cause her to go off the deep end, or is she just wanting attention?

 

What do you all think? Is she justified for continuing to insult me? She will apologize for it, then continue to do it over and over again by message. But then saying, she is trying not to say worse things. What do you think I should do? Have I done enough?

Edited July 13, 2013 by Egychick

[It-is-what-it-is.]

Sometimes friendships end naturally and you should not fight it.

 

You made a mistake and you apologized there really is no more you can do.

 

Be the bigger person and let her remain angry if she wants, but stop being involved.

[writergal]

Leave her alone. It doesn't sound like you two are very compatible as friends.

Edited July 13, 2013 by writergal

[sdraw108]

A friend who is willing to cut ties because you didn't invite them to an isolated event, doesn't sound like much of a friend to me. It sounds like she has issues, and it sounds like they've been present with her previous friendships - you shouldn't blame yourself for what has happened.

[GG3]

Ever watch Dr Phil and he talks about people who have a "sunburn?" It sounds like she is very sensitive because of things people may have done to her in the past. It isn't your fault. All you can do is tell her it was a misunderstanding and if she doesn't believe you there isn't much you can do.

 

I feel sorry for her in a way.

[todreaminblue]

If she has had bad experiences in the past it may take her a little time to get over it.....no one is justified in hurling insults, and you have asked for peace with her....hopefully if she believes in the prayer and worship she does attend, forgiveness will be in her heart sooner rather than later...everyone makes mistakes....some take longer to get over hurts than others.......forgiveness goes both ways and even though she has hurt you by the insults.....I hope that forgiveness finds its' way home to both of you...hugs and best wishes....deb

[whichwayisup]

. But since that time I hurt her, she has insulted me, called me stupid, arrogant, self-centered, immature, and ego driven. I have tried to make peace with her. But no matter what I do, she insults me. And says, she doesn't want to be friends with me, not even acquaintances. I understand her, I know she has the right to be angry.

 

Trust me, you are so much better off not having her in your life.

 

You made a mistake and apologized for hurting your friend. Honestly what you did wasn't SUCH A BIG DEAL and your friend has greatly exaggerated this and made it into something else. D.R.A.M.A! Totally unnecessary too.

 

You apologized and she's been rude, cruel and hateful. Unforgiving for what? All because she wasn't invited? She is handling this so wrong... You say she has the right to be angry, OK fine, but she has NO right to treat you like she has. She's the one with the ego, and she's immature! Her reaction to this is so not normal.

 

Don't try to reach out to her anymore. Something is definitely "off" with her.