Yeahsussu Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Hey all. I´m 27 years old and my closest girl friends are all about the same age. During the past year they pretty much all got kids, and one friend is pregnant. This makes me feel like I´m the "weird one" in our group, and I feel like I´m not that interesting to them anymore, since I don´t have kids and I´m in quite a new relationship (my friends have been married for many years already). We do try to meet as often as possible, but lately it has just been about once a month, if even that. It is of course understandable because they now have kids, but I just feel a bit left out. Nowadays when we meet they only talk about dipers, baby food, toys, equipment etc, which is not that exciting for me at the moment. I´m very rarely the person that takes initiative to meet (which I´m a bit ashamed of), although I´d love to meet them more often. I just feel like I´m interrupting in their life and that they don´t have time for me. But just a few days ago I sent them all a message if they wanted to hang out in the park next weekend for a little picnic, and everyone except my pregnant friend has so far told me "maybe". I know they have a full schedule nowadays with their kids but I can´t help but feel a bit sad and dissapointed that no one wants to hang out. Or am I just over analyzing? Link to post Share on other sites
kamani Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 Yes. I think you are over analyzing. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 No, I don't think you are over-analyzing. I don't think they are doing it on purpose (working and taking care of a baby takes a LOT of time!), but you have every right to feel disappointed. That is why friends come and go, a lot of the time. We drift from some and make new ones, depending on our direction and situation in life. It does suck that your closest friends seem to be in the process of drifting, but it seems that that is life. I do find it odd that you have NO friends who are your age and unmarried or at the very least child-free. I'm only a year younger than you, and while some of my friends have kids, the vast majority don't yet. Like you, I do find that I've drifted a little from the few friends with kids, but to me that's just life - we're in very different places in life now so our interests, topics of conversation, etc, are going to be very different. Are all your friends just from one social circle, say, your high school group? If they are, perhaps time to broaden your horizons and meet new people? Don't burn your bridges, obviously, but getting to know more people doesn't hurt. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Yeahsussu Posted June 19, 2013 Author Share Posted June 19, 2013 We´ve known each other since we were like 5-6 years old, so we kinda have this "we will always stick together" feeling, which is great of course. I guess I should just get used to not being able to see them as much as they have entered a new chapter in their lives and mine is just going on in the same steady phase. I do have other friends in my age that don´t have kids, however most of them live in another city so I see them even more rarely than my closest friends. But yes I do agree that I should also seek new friendships, you can never have too many friends right. I currently live in a VERY small town which doesn´t make things easier. I just don´t want to feel like I´m interrupting every time I keep in touch, but that´s kinda how it feels. That it´s too much effort to come and hang out, and every time we do meet it requires one week of planning to get everyone organized.. Link to post Share on other sites
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