Does my male friend like me?

[TheVanishedOne]

I met a guy (and a bunch of other people) earlier in the year due to a mutual interest. I’m twenty; he’s in his late 20s. When I first met him I didn’t spend long thinking about him… thought he seemed a nice guy and that was about it. Over a few months I noticed he was really funny and likable…often made me laugh… but at the same time seemed slightly distant with me sometimes.

 

That seemingly changed overnight a couple of months ago and I noticed that he was suddenly much warmer. He started teasing me in a fun way…nothing nasty. Things like jokingly scaring me and making fun of silly things I do or say.

 

I didn’t think about any of this much until I saw him at a social gathering a while ago. It was after that I started to analyse (or maybe over-analyse!) his behaviour around me. To summarise things he’s done:

 

Teases me playfully quite often – as far as I’ve observed he doesn’t do this to the other girls

Teased me in front of his male friends

I once looked up and saw he was looking at me and smiling. He didn't look away when I noticed, but just carried on for a few more seconds.

One of our mutual friends/acquaintances made a sexual joke about us once. At the time I didn’t even look at him to see his reaction because I was laughing/slightly embarrassed. Now I kind of wish I’d looked.

When I was in fancy-dress for a party he stopped right in front of me and looked my body up and down rather intently. My costume wasn’t elaborate in the slightest, so that seemed a bit unnecessary.

At the same event hinted at a joke that was slightly sexual, but he decided not to say it because it was lame.

 

I don’t know whether I’m just over-analysing his behaviour or not. I know he’s single and quite an outgoing, fun-loving person, so some of it could just be his personality. As far as I know, he’s been single a pretty long time – he’s also a typical nice guy who doesn’t seem threatening in a sexual way.

 

I keep going back and forth on it all, between ‘definitely yes’ and ‘maybe’ and ‘no.’ I don’t think I’m attracted to him, but nonetheless I think he’s a great person and I’m…curious. We have a mutual friend who has witnessed some (although not all) of this. She hasn’t brought it up, so I don’t know whether that’s because she hasn’t noticed because it doesn’t exist or she doesn’t want to stir by mentioning it to me.

 

If the guy were my age this would be almost a no-brainer, but the fact that he’s older makes me question whether he’d even see me that way or whether it’s more like older-brother teasing.

 

What do people think? And is there any way of figuring it out without asking? (which I absolutely will not do.)

Edited November 26, 2012 by TheVanishedOne